#
It's very nice that ! #
Any carrots ? #
Any carrots ? #
Any spuds ? #
No , pork probably . #
in the morning . #
Oh , he knows what's going on . #
No , but when , when Reg car he said he might put his . #
About , it's all about money and he says well sort it out and he agreed that we're gonna get hard and all the rest of it so I'll just tell him ! #
I'll just say that #
Yeah . #
I'll just say oh well we're working on Saturday #
bit like that . #
That's all I'll say i in the morning and if he says yes , I'll say oh fair enough then . #
But I said oh alright then . #
Work till dinner time or something then , then we're going down , well I'll go in my own bloody car the next time ! #
In front #
No I'm not . #
Call me then when you wanna do the meat . #
Put the kettle on for a cuppa . #
Was it ? #
Was that cos the back door was open ? #
Yeah . #
It might have been in a fight or something ? #
Probably #
No . #
So did you stroke it #
it in the end or what ? #
With us , suddenly ! #
Funny about #
that cat didn't come back and ? #
He was a big one ! #
It's alright . #
Aye . #
Yeah . #
Yeah . #
Les has gone out to Do-it-all B and Q or somewhere like that . #
Some tiles for the kitchen . #
Presume so , aye ! #
That's right Ian's got that tile cutter ain't he ? #
I had it , remember and I gave #
it to Ian ? #
Yeah . #
Probably , I should think so . #
Three carrots isn't it ? #
Or four ? #
Just don't tell them ! #
No ! #
I don't think , has it got bathroom ones in there ? #
You can stick them in now anyway . #
No . #
Why ? #
Yeah . #
It might have been that thing that er that bloke puts in them . #
In our paper #
Aye ! #
You what ? #
Well , don't cut them too small ! #
Yeah . #
Aye I watched that ! #
Oh some singer man ! #
Some old er my nan knew it . #
No , I didn't know him from bloody Adam ! #
But my nan knew him he was some top bloody singer years ago ! #
And he'd just made a film and , we were watching something #
and , was it David McCallum or something ? #
He's plays the detective that's chasing him er , in it . #
Man from Uncle . #
Is David McCallum . #
The stupid slag ! #
You didn't mind not going to that pub tonight did you ? #
I didn't fancy going out . #
Mm . #
Was it that little pub ? #
Strawberry pub ? #
Ah ! #
Yeah . #
Oh aye ! #
You're going #
down towards the M fifty three lights ? #
I know . #
Not as far as that chimney place now , no ? #
No , no ! #
If I'd have Jan with Ben and we thought it was a new girlfriend . #
Dear me ! #
Well do you want all in bed I'll go ? #
. #
Yes er ! #
What will ? #
Well something's bloody burning ! #
But there again . #
? #
She's been at work today ! #
Why didn't she go back home for dinner ? #
Are they ? #
I thought he was going for the interview for the job #
What was the audition for ? #
Was it an orchestra like ? #
Yeah . #
Well #
Mm . #
Oh no ! #
How did you get on at that wedding ? #
Well your mum has hasn't she ? #
Ain't your mum said nothing to her ? #
Well your mum won't go in until Sunday will she ? #
So we will be #
Ah , somebody was oh they were with the gyppos or something . #
Yeah . #
Oh , on Radio one listening with my mum the other day . #
Well don't burn that ! #
Yeah . #
next door's , he said we can get some anytime , get you one when we get . #
Ooh ! #
No . #
Alright ! #
Longer . #
Yep ! #
Well that to eat all the meat today . #
Aye ! #
It doesn't seem long since , looking like Chris , just after Christmas it was ! #
Yeah , well they did because they all come in a quarter don't they ? #
They all start coming again now . #
Well they are ! #
Well it's just like phone bill kind of thing . #
Except for #
for the electrical bill . #
And then it was the cu , we'd payed that and then a couple of weeks after it was the phone and then it was the gas ! #
And then you have a quarter then it'll start with the electric , then phone , then gas again ! #
But they always around about Christmas time . #
My mam reckons that the #
The what ? #
There's nothing in it ! #
While you're going upstairs get us a bottle of beer please ? #
Can't . #
Aye . #
How many in there bottles now ? #
Get some more of this . #
No , not the one . #
On a quarter ? #
And then we put two pints in it after don't we ? #
Do we ? #
Yeah . #
Do you put salt in it ? #
I don't know . #
About forty eight bottles I suppose . #
I know ! #
Excuse me ! #
Yeah yeah . #
Yep . #
Yep . #
Well not one for here ! #
Mm . #
And where does she live ? #
It's a Port . #
Oh I know the ones , they're getting a or something ? #
Sad thing ! #
What like pleated little skirt things ? #
Oh bloody charming that ! #
Well , not in a tartan ? #
. #
loads of talking . #
That's all . #
aye . #
It's right though , it was in the paper ! #
You were gonna say fax it up normally you should just say fax it m'lord . #
Aye , that's what he might have said like before he could fax it up . #
Won't he ? #
What are you gonna now with that that football . #
And then I'm gonna go for a shower . #
Turn it down #
a bit cos it might boil dry . #
Oh it has ! #
That will do . #
I thought you had to put the lid on it for , if you did it for quarter of an hour ? #
Well it makes no odds really anyway ! #
Alright . #
Ooh , I'm sick of it !the election had already started couldn't you ? #
Mm . #
Half five . #
What's this I'm watching here now ? #
Channel four , what's on ? #
Train of Wars . #
It's not started . #
No . #
Aye ! #
Yeah I know ! #
Ooh I'll carry on watching this and go for a bloody shower ! #
You said , you watched it last week . #
Mickey Rourke in what ? #
I don't know ! #
Marti ? #
Yeah . #
He's that erm American actor . #
I dunno . #
Dunno . #
He's an arsehole ! #
Bloody black and white ! #
The trainer isn't . #
Mm ? #
I dunno ! #
Where's tonight ? #
Yes , I know what you mean , that's right ! #
Chairs are too . #
not there . #
Yeah . #
Oh aye ! #
Well then on Friday night they probably get #
a hundred bloody people in there you haven't got no glasses ! #
Russell at the bar , in fact , he didn't have plastic glasses , he had no glasses ! #
What glasses ? #
Mm . #
It'll probably go up now . #
down here #
It's #
it's been in a week er #
You might have to until he gets there . #
Mould into the brewery sort of thing . #
He's overcharging course #
he is , so he makes it up . #
Yeah . #
But I think he's got most of them he's gotta #
Uncle Charlie . #
Oh dear ! #

Yeah . #
That was first free visit there . #
It's all in your time , sort of thing . #
Cow ! #
Ah aye ! #
Oh ! #
Erm I take it we're we're going to the shops and you all #
Ah you're barred , you're barred ! #
He'll be doing it himself . #
He told me you knew Phillip was there . #
I think I'll stop on a stool , I'd sooner stop on a stool . #
Yeah . #
Aye ! #
Oh I'm alright . #
Ah #
Oh aye ! #
you don't know the full story , she might have had a bit of a #
before #
They've had to open a service for them , they're all getting their stamps #
or whatever she might have just said something in #
and he's #
and he's gonna blow it up ! #
I I I just hear it when never freed any more hostages . #
Yeah . #
Bloody type your ! #
She part of the family #
I know but family's like blood's thicker than water . #
Family is still #
family . #
Mm . #
I could just see if she wanted to adopt #
me couldn't I ? #
Yeah it's that . #
What ? #
Did you go #
She said to Susan will it be better than ? #

Being diplomatic ! #
Breathe in ! #
That film is not . #
Yeah . #
There was a film on B B C two #
it was on the Welsh #
black and white . #
And they had a little #
It's been advertised #
all the week what a good film it is . #
I went on , we'll watch that we'll erm #
A film you know ,six o'clock film . #
I put it , put it on , B B C two and it was that Gordon on the , on the box . #
Typical ! #
You silly git ! #
Forget it ! #
You didn't bring ! #
It was D E F , DEF it was like , like the #
I wouldn't i , oh you just told me you did ! #
Oh you got a , you're not exaggerating a bloody ! #
Like the ! #
Aye , aye aye oh ! #
Don't bury them like ! #
He was what ? #
Oh , I thought you said not young ! #
Did he have big lips ? #
Did he ? #
I'm used to taking like his lips are sticking to the window ! #

Did you see that programme last night ? #
B B C two about the stolen cars . #
Oh ! #
Bloody hell , the things they get up to ! #
You know if you buy a car that's been , like it's been pinched or something like that ? #
Yeah , buy it in innocence and if it's been robbed the police confiscate off you you get a piece of paper saying that they've got it , and that's it you've you've got nothing ! #
And the insurers #
don't have anything to do with it ! #
Yeah . #
Mm . #
But er #
they were on about that they ship them abroad and th , they were interviewing a lad in London he said oh , he used to get up in the morning and er go down to the phone box and phone this contact they know and he'd tell you what cars you wanted pinching this day and they pinch them to order ! #
Oh yeah how many would you say you'd pinched in year ? #
He said , well , he said there was two of us he said working together and er , I'd be look out for my mate or he'd be look out for me , he says erm ooh , between five and six hundred a year , he said they pinch ! #
I said and they . #
Yeah . #
What #
said , you know how , how did you get into them ? #
He said , well let's put it this way he said I can get into a Ford and start it without breaking any windows #
yeah quicker than I can with a key ! #
He didn't say what he did #
but he said , a Ford he said , I can break into a Ford without breaking any windows and start the ignition #
quicker than anybody with a key ! #
But he was a a reformed now he was helping other people ge get away from pinching cars like in a they have like #
you know , rehabilitation centres they . #
He said , what we used to do he said #
Oh aye ! #

and they said er #
He wasn't old was he ? #
Twenty four , twenty five . #
Sometimes , he said we used to take them motorway he said to junction whatever at Dover and they'd be somebody waiting there with the money give us the car we'd go back to London and they'd just take it up the . #
Ah ! #
Yeah . #
Up there ? #
Aye . #
Yeah it's all organised , it's not like like the gypo's will be doing like this #
this is all organised bloody down to ! #
They did . #
They'd have made a fortune ! #
Not without them garages ! #
Doing it make a make a fortune doing it #
legally . #
He said they're doing this as well . #
like you got your your chassis number and engine number and everything like that #
and you've a number inside the car as well on the bottom of the car on the floor so er some of them no , they don't so some of them take the mickey of them and putting different plates on of a written off car from a scrap yard so you can have like a brand new Sierra smashed up in a scrap yard and you buy it for like a thousand pound and you this Sierra with a brand new Sierra , so you change all the plates over and do all this on the car and then you got a bloody Sierra worth about nine or ten thousand pound #
brand new ! #
And you've paid a thousand pound for it , so he's making all this profit all the time ! #
And the the police were just showing , you know #
the ways that they do it sort of thing . #
Some of them #
just get the plate and er like stick it over with a bit of er filler or something like that and stick it over the top ! #
And , people are none the wiser they , if they can see it #
they go aye , that's alright , but the only way you can tell you'd feel a jagged edge where they put this plate . #
Or some of them they cut the whole floor out and weld a new take the floor old car and weld it back in again . #
He said , and the police said #
as quick as we find a way , to catch them they think of something else #
they bloody do it all the time ! #
Yeah . #
Fell apart in Manchester . #
There was one in Manchester wasn't there ? #
The Renault five turbo going down the road and had a crash and it split in two didn't it ? #
And they all bloody died ! #
And er said about it's a regular and er they're doing it proper , they're putting them on jigs so they're welding them and they're out of line and all sorts ! #
And they were interviewing this feller , he said , oh we went for a day out he said and I'd just bought this car and I was really made up with it he said #
Oh no ! #
He paid two and a thousand for this car , whatever it was ! #
I was real made up ! #
And he's travelling along the road and the next thing there's such a bang and it wouldn't go any further ! #
Bloody ! #
So he got out and he looked underneath and the drive shaft had fell off so he got it towed back to the garage wherever this garage was and they had a look at it and all the head were loose you could waggle them about ! #
And then he thought , this is queer so he picked the bonnet took the bonnet up like that and all the bloody front of the car had come loose and all all the welding #
had co come loose ! #
Bloody amazing it was ! #
So he said , you know you can't claim anything off the insurers or anything , so that's all his money #
straight up the bloody road ! #
And er the police , that was in Kent somewhere , the police weren't it ? #
Cos only so many police forces have got a certain group of men on the you know , sorting all the cars out and you can take your car there #
er #
you've just bought a car or you've got a car you can take it and the police look over it to see if it's alright . #
If it's been re-registered sort of thing , so there's a big line in cars all . #
And the police engineers go round with his mate and he's looking at the engine numbers and the chassis numbers and all those bloody numbers inside the car and he's looking like and er the interviewer said oh and this woman's in for a shock ! #
She's gonna find out that the car is stolen ! #
So she comes back and she had an Orion erm she sa , she said er oh well erm I got some bad news for you , said er your Orion's two cars been welded together ! #
Oh no , she said you're kidding aren't you ? #
No , no , it's right I said erm the back end is such and such a registration Ford Orion but the front end's off a Ford Escort ! #
And you know she'd but #
She'd lose the bloody car then , she'd lost everything ! #
Bloody hot it were ! #
Oh it , it was smart it was nice ! #
No they haven't , they'd been bought a car that had been like , that it sort of been written off and rebuilt or something like that . #
Yeah . #
Yeah . #
The D V L C , if you have a written off #
they'll re-register it as long as you can prove the year of the car , they register it #
as that year . #
But , the registrations if they can't prove it properly #
you get a Q plate on it questionable registration . #
So the D V L C don't look into it too deep they just send #
an engineer have a look round , oh it looks alright . #

And then there was an inspector from the #
Mm . #
Oh no ! #
Yeah . #
So you'd have been running ? #
Oh aye ! #
Yeah . #

Pint of Stella please ? #
A pint of Stella ? #
Ah . #
Yeah , I I #
Not Upper Parliament #
? #
Yeah . #
Yeah . #
Don't know really . #
How many time #
The only time I remember her , really was in . #
Yeah . #
Pushing him ! #
got stuck #
In this car #
No hang about ! #
We're gonna come back . #

they blame #
Like ? #
No , beard will have to go ! #

, I was gonna tell #
There was big football team from Saletiendi #
Should of got the extra ladder . #

We could do with a lot more #
Christ , so what , I can't think of it ! #
Who's a horrible man ? #
Once I get in from work , I'm knackered ! #
If it had been a summer night #
could of been tempted . #
Well . #
That was #
just a bad thing to do innit ? #
No , he's a bit rough ! #
Cos he ! #
Oh aye ! #
Well , no you can , aye ! #
Yeah ! #
Oh , you can buy a cheap ones with a just a tape on without the #
and record player #
Ooh aye , what them bloody cars #
they were in er #
Is it Southern Spain #
the Spanish police and er #
insurance investigators in Britain . #
pa #
is a like #
on the main road #
and anything with a foreign number plate they were #
pulling over #
especially the British ones #
and erm #
They were just stopping #
them and just #
taking the details #
chassis numbers and engine numbers and everything #
and er #
insurance etcetera and i , investigator whatever he was ! #
And he's calling the D V L C in Swansea #
they normally just #
and this woman was in her #
a little O Opel #
whatever it was . #
Little maroon Opel , B registration #
So I took all the #
the particulars , he'd get on his mobile phone #
and erm #
oh it was er #
whatever it is , oh yes that's er #
He goes back and he says I've got some very bad news for you #
Oh ! #
well , this Opel isn't an Opel ! #
Well what is it ? #
It's a Vauxhall Nova . #
You're kidding ? #
No er #
it's a silver Vauxhall Nova . #
they bloody changed it all about so that the ,O , little Opel , was a Vauxhall Nova ! #
Erm , so what happens now ? #
Oh erm #
the police are typing #
a thing up they'll have to confiscate the car ! #
Been #
stolen ! #
And they had that and a #
Toyota Celica , black #
No , she was living out there . #
she had a #
House out there . #
So it's #
she had #
and er #
it was just they had a big warehouse #
just full of bloody cars that had been confiscated ! #
There's was thousands of cars , cars that were stuck in there . #
Some little cars there was Range Rovers #
everything ! #
They didn't say , they didn't go into it . #
Aye . #
Yeah . #
They can't claim money for these . #
That woman I said about that had the #
she was in an Orion but the front end of it was a Escort #
the escort that it be #
it belonged to the i , the numbers #
So the chassis number engine number for this Escort #
and they #
chased the feller and he phoned him up and he said ooh my #
car's still parked on the drive outside ! #
So they were investigating him then ! #
Cos his car was still in the drive outside . #
Well bloody #
But they do it the other way as well . #
It #
He pinched a car in Italy this is a Ferrari #
Testarossa #
it was worth #
hundred thousand pound in Britain #
it was #
it had been shaped #
And they paid #
it was on a car park at Heathrow Airport #
and it had all the paperwork with it , it was gonna be shipped to Singapore . #
Well the same car in Singapore was worth two hundred thousand pound #
cos there's such a long waiting list ,tha that's the value of it out there #
so they they pinched it and got a buyer out there ! #
and they caught him , you know , mid-way type of thing . #
So th #

Yeah . #
Do you wanna lager bitter #
lemon ? #
Right . #
What crisps do you want ? #
Aye ! #
Or whether you scared him after to death ! #
That's it . #

goal #
He wouldn't care would he ? #
He used to do the same everyone else ! #
Well you wouldn't would you ? #
You can ! #
Bugger them ! #
I would ! #
And you put twenty #
Mm . #
Win a few . #
Oh yeah ! #

Aye , there's one in bloody #
No , no . #
Mm . #
It was on telly about them weren't it ? #
They reckon they're gonna find a cure for that . #
No , but people have died through it through le ye years #
we we #
You know and they'll through #
Mm . #
Yeah . #
Mm . #
Well our Susan when she was small she was the same . #
She couldn't have er she couldn't have a feather pillow . #
They , they thought of everything , oh have you got a cat , you got a dog , you got this you got that ? #
And in the end it was a feather pillow . #
But now she's alright , she had a feather of pillow for a couple of years it's like #
a bloody now ! #
! #
Aye , well she had hayfever when she was small #
you know a couple a years and she's never had . #
Yeah , but if you took the watch off it should stop . #
Mm . #
Always used to have it on her wrist . #
Yeah . #
That #
Yeah . #
Ooh , God I can't remember #
and #
she used to ,bu no , she us used to have one if she used that and she used to have to bandage them #
to go to bed at night . #
Well , if you're in your sleep you're #
And she used to bandage them tight #
and she can still #
in her sleep get her fingers down #

And I I was only bloody tiny then but I can still remember it . #
She used to wake up in the morning they were red raw both of them ! #
even with these bandages on , just like #
I can remember the bandages being on . #
She'd still get her bloody fingers in there though ! #
It's not like the washing powder or something like that , they reckon you said it's just you know #
you're cuff's tighter than #
anywhere isn't it ? #
rubbing on #
Mm . #
Mm . #
Well that corned beef , fetch us a quarter in on Monday mate ! #

corned beef . #
Yeah . #
That's with hayfever in Southport weren't she , after feeding the horses hay ? #
We went to see them horses remember ?bloody screaming ! #
Yeah . #
No it was #
Well #
I don't know , she said #
it was hayfever , remember #
when we went to them horses ? #

Yeah . #
No , it's it's it's no , he is aye , he's the director ! #
His big brothers run the firm . #
No , no , it's #
no it's whatever , it's Andrew and #
Colin . #
A , that's A C , I don't know what the M is , I don't know . #
Andrew and Colin , not Andrew . #
No , Andrew a one brother's Andrew , the other one's Colin and they're the partners in the firm #
so it's yeah . #
Well I don't know . #
Oh it might be Michael and Andrew Co , then . #
Michael is it's it isn't ! #
Ah , they had the money to buy they had every they could afford #
anything ! #
The highest one . #
Yeah . #
The , that horse was British #
champion , whatever this bloody horse was it was something #
stylish ! #
British #
champion at , whatever it was at . #
Yeah . #
Yeah . #
It was like all houses see there's a main road #
Mm . #
Mm . #
Mm . #
Ah , but where this house were along the road #
like yo yo your houses and the #
bloody gardens but all , the back of there , they owned everything ! #
You know there might ha , there might have been three hundred ya , three hundred yards of houses semis and detached and they had a bit of land , but all the back of that , that was theirs ! #
You know , it was all fenced they hadn't lived there long had they ? #
And it was all new fences and it had all been it had been . #
No it was old . #
It wasn't at first , #
Aye , but in that lounge , when I when I went that lounge it was , they were the sort of people that bloody don't open the curtains ! #
They'll save the blo , I presume save the bloody sun you know , fading the carpet or the curtains . #
Cos the carpet must have been worth a bloody fortune anyway ! #
All the furniture in there was all you know , really smart stuff ! #
Well I suppose it was antique , it was awful ! #
bloody #
hard wood , oh it was really smelly ! #
And it had a they had a stuffed fox . #
Stuffed fox . #
Tosh's dad shot it . #
And he'd been out shooting , but Tosh had give it to this feller #
and this feller taxidermist . #
seriously though , you ca you couldn't see where it had been shot . #
I had a look round it , oh it's this #
he was there really ! #
Oh #
like a little rigid bloody board thing ! #
Oh this was really nice , it was only #
a young fox . #
Oh it was really nice ! #
And they had another one #
that was er it had been done #
all like oh like , twenty years ago #
and the difference it was #
the new one , it was like #
it was there it was #
looked nice , but the other one it was all snarled and everything ! #
The person who'd done the old one #
in my eyes like , was more professional than the one that had done the new one ! #
Cos it was all all this #
you know ,and that sort of thing . #
It was all smell and I don't know what it was ! #
To look at you could just imagine that , you know , going for something looking like that . #
I had a dream didn't I ? #
I told you , I had a dream about er #
dreaming about the baby #
in the week #
It was a little #
it was a little lad , I dreamt it was a little lad #
and er #
we were going we were going the house #
Yeah . #
and we were going their house , but it wasn't Judith's , it was Rob's mum and dad's down Road and er we went in and you didn't know anything about it , and I walked in a Rob said she's had it ! #
I said what is it ? #
It's a little lad and I I looked through a window , I could see Judith holding this baby but you had to walk round to get to her and I knew before you'd got there and you were all over the moon about this little baby and everything #
and i it was all , you know #
It was only tiny but it bloody talk ! #
bloody talk ! #

wasn't sure that #
Kelly can . #
Oh yeah ! #
Oh aye ! #
Well she said herself she's expecting a lad though isn't she ? #
No , she hasn't been told but she , she's thinks it's gonna be a lad . #
Oh aye ! #
That was . #
It's , it's too bloody much ! #
the hairdressers . #
Somebody must of spent hours thinking #
of all them ! #
You brought the book home ! #
He was there today wasn't he ? #
Ah . #
Just bits and pieces . #
He's a bloody that idiot ! #
It's really timid isn't it ? #
Oh no ! #
And then it was rolling over and doing all sorts weren't it ? #
I don't think it's very old . #
I think it might even be that kitten #
you know ? #
Oh it's #
comical honestly ! #
oh #
Yeah , you can stroke it but it's , awful thing is #
Oh aye ! #
But you have to be really slow . #
No . #
It just run off . #
It has had an operation you know . #
You can see the mark . #
On it's back leg . #
Looking at it , yeah you can see it . #
The fur's starting to grow a little bit #
which mark innit ? #
Mm . #
Run away . #
No , I was in . #
It were a weekend ! #
He were on the shed roof ? #
Mm . #
But tonight before , well on Saturday before we came up like he'd been back and to this after , well this morning really and I , he'd disappeared hadn't he ? #
And I heard the bathroom window open and I went in there , I was just having a look , admiring my little shed roof there ! #

No I wasn't ! #
Anyway , , the old shed looks well there er , I dunno why I started to look out and the cat was on his back legs with his feet like that and he was looking up at me like that ! #
So I thought I'd , so I thought oh I better shut the bloody window , cos if he gets through it , you know , he be , get into it ! #
Sweet as a nut ! #
He has been a couple of times . #
Mm . #
He might #
be a bit hungry anyway , mighten he ? #
Or she . #
We have . #
If living is without you . #

ask for bloody Willy Wonka ! #
What's that ? #
Ah yeah ! #
That was in er ? #
What ? #
No ! #
These are good for another twelve #
months ! #
it's in the paper . #
The one with the . #
See you lad ! #
when we get over , lads . #
She was . #
Good God , she was only fourteen she had a deeper voice than #
delayed . #
It's gonna be one o'clock I expect when she gets in . #
Is she ? #
Paul been ? #
Good god . #
What the hell's wrong with him ? #
When's he going back ? #
It'll be too bloody late now . #
Oh . #
Yeah . #
We've got a cat comes to our house , a white one . #
Pure white like that . #
Comes #
from next door isn't he ? #
Lovely he is . #
No it's a different one . #
he's alright he you can stroke him but you have to go slow towards him . #
He's alright , he was rolling over on the floor yesterday with me wasn't he ? #
Well I wasn't rolling on the floor , the cat was . #
Mhm #
Where was that ambulance going yesterday ? #
He turned down here . #
We was we was outside our house and I seen it turning along there somewhere . #
Mm #
It's not her bloody husband . #
Who's Mrs ? #
Oh aye . #
Well it come with them bloody blue lights going #
through #
You could , you could hear him coming for miles . #
Ah #
Mrs eh ? #
Was she ? #
Oh dear . #
She'd be better in a bloody home wouldn't she ? #
Hasn't he ? #

Ooh that's a shame that you missed her , bloody hell . #
Ooh you'd have never got down the road . #
Aunty Beryl #
When was the last time you seen her ? #
Was it ? #
She must be #
Lost her bloody voice again perhaps . #
Well if you rung you could always say oh I'll have to go cos somebody at the door if she starts going on a bit long . #
Say ooh there's somebody at the door , have to go . #
That's the best . #
Well of course you can . #
Well if you didn't ring tonight and rung tomorrow and rung early on-ish and you'll have to say #
ooh our Michael , ooh , ooh there's somebody at the door , I'll have to go . #
Yeah . #
And you could have ten minutes on the phone and say ooh I'll have to go , there's somebody at the door . #
And then that's it then innit ? #
The ball's in her court then . #
Ah . #
Yeah . #
They're coming at Easter . #
Yeah . #
Mm . #
Did you watch Beadle before ? #
Oh #
Neighbours and Coronation Street . #
Mm . #
Have they ? #
There were a lot of crows when we went for a walk before flying round . #
Aye . #
Mm . #
Looking for turds . #
No . #
I went to the tip yesterday #
to the skips and in a fortnight they shut . #
They're shutting the skips down and then anything that you take then you have to take straight to the tip . #
And they're gonna charge you for going there even if you've got like household stuff in the car , they're gonna charge you for tipping . #
I said to the bloke I'll not bloody pay . #
He said well I've lost me job through it he said . #
Cos he looks after the s the skips #
and then he can have what they have to put price in and then they , they have the scrap out of them see and all the rest of it . #
So I've lost me bloody job because of it he said . #
And the nearest place to go to a skip then is in Queensferry . #
And if you just tip it outside the gates they're gonna fine you two thousand pound . #
Well he reckons they're gonna have like security there and everything . #
Spencers . , #
Nowt . #
Yeah . #
Where ? #
Spencers ? #
Mm . #
I said I'll leave mine out for the bloody bin men before I take it down the tippy . #
I'd put bags of bloody bricks on the front . #
And I'd leave the buggers there as well . #
If he didn't take them they could stop there . #
He said it's bec all because the tipping's been privatized or something . #
Well they reckon they've , they've split it all ready for privatizing . #
Because there's like post office parcels now isn't there ? #
And #
the post office counters . #
Like the post office down the road . #
And the post office letters and all the bloody rest of it , it's all been split up ready so they just privatize it . #
Not poll tax , bloody tolls . #
Did you watch the football this afternoon or that #
kung fu . #
Did you , didn't see kung fu no ? #
And the Antiques Roadshow . #
Aye . #
I didn't see that . #
It won't go any tighter , you'll have to put more paper in it if you wanna #
Well just leave it like that and let it stretch so the leather stays like that . #
That's where she had the bloody potato at the back of the bloody thing , there , pushing it in . #
It has stretched it hasn't it ? #
You'll pull the bloody leather from under there if you tighten it any more . #
You see it won't tighten any more , that's it . #
Well it just winds up and it pushes a wedge forward and splays them out . #
Well it's for like a a narrower shoe , a woman's shoe , #
pack it out . #
About the wedding ? #

Eh ? #
I dunno . #
Oh he's staining them . #
He should have left the bloody things off because they're gonna have to take them off if they have their carpets down and might have to have something planed off them or something mightn't they ? #
Mm it looks well now . #
But he was having today as well weren't he , his back door ? #
He was having his back door put on today weren't he ? #
Well he had an old one on , he bought a new one on Friday . #
Oh it looks well there now . #
Mm . #
Mm . #
Well he's had the fire plumbed in but the gas isn't on . #
I d well that's what he was gonna do , that's what Les was gonna do , put the fire in . #
It's only a matter of connecting the bloody pipe up . #
He's had an electric bill hasn't he for god knows how much . #
And he hasn't bloody used any . #
Mm something like that , or eighty pound was it ? #
I said what you gonna do ? #
I said you wanna send the bugger back , he said don't worry I have done . #
Well that's the one , he's had one . #
Aye ours will be , if you have yours in the morning ours will be here tomorrow or Tuesday #
I expect . #
Shouldn't be that much . #
Did you see that Stars in Their Eyes last night ? #
That Lesley Crowther with them people singing . #
That young girl was good weren't she ? #
Mm . #
Aye . #
But she s Marty's got a tape of the woman that actually sung that anyroad who she bloody sounds like her . #
She was good . #
Yes . #
Dopey little bugger that one eh ? #
Horrible little bugger . #
shed will be nice and dry now , there'll be no water leaking in #
I'll have to get some wood preserver or creosote and #
I'll do all the fences before #
Well it's too bloody late now , all the rain will have stopped by I finish messing about I expect . #
It's made the difference though putting that other stuff on it . #
I did it with some stuff before #
and er I was watching it when it was raining the other day , you could see the rain dripping off the wood rather than soaking into it so it's done something . #
Oh everything's been in the bloody thing anyway . #
Everything's in there anyway . #
No . #
I'm gonna get all the back tidy for the summer . #
I know it's not very big but #
if I get it tidy , put a bit of do all , get all the garden level and everything . #
Be able to , at least be able to sit out or something in the summer . #
And I'll put so bit more soil in that , you know that border thing that we've got there ? #
Well there was all concrete and all sorts on the top of that weren't there ? #
So I've knocked it all up so I'm gonna dig it over and put , get some more soil this next week . #
Well I don't know . #
I don't wanna pay for the bugger . #
I'll see Johnny , see if he's got anything . #
Mm . #
Well I'll leave ca I don't wanna do them till the summer , it will be too bloody wet now . #
It's wet as down there . #
Went down for a walk today didn't we ? #
It was slippery as hell down the fields . #
Mm . #
Mm . #
Oh aye he's alright . #
He was #
this morning . #
We was we give him an aspirin he was alright . #
Oh aye . #
We took a couple of photos of him again today . #
So if , he's got a fortnight #
He's got a fortnight before it's gotta go in anyway #
so we'll have this film developed #
There . #
We'll get it developed and we've #
we've got things on him as well so we find the best . #
Yeah he was comical wasn't he , tonight ? #
He had his bloody he had his cushion and he had his bloody , you know that one how we got him with his head on his cushion like that ? #
He was lying with his head on his cushion , eh #
god almighty . #
Do they ? #
Oh aye . #
Well I suppose they'll , you send them all in then there's eight semi finalists #
and then they'll just pick one out of that to go on as part of the calendar . #
For one of the months , I would have thought . #
The way , that's the way I read it anyway . #
Mm #
I would have thought so . #
I think that's what it'll be myself . #
I mean if you sent that one in with his head on his cushion er erm I don't suppose there'll be anybody else is gonna send one in like that . #
People's gonna be sending them in with with the dog #
standing there or doing #
whatever . #
But that one it , they might say oh you know , bloody hell that's #
good you know . #
That'd be nice to have on the calendar sort of thing . #
I know we , you haven't got a cat in bloody hell's chance of us going but #
Oh no . #
Aye . #
Yeah . #
Shall we make a move then ? #
It's had some knocks that bugger , it's never come down yet . #
Oh aye . #
Oh I don't remember . #
Right . #
Mm , take it if you want . #
Oh . #
Oh doesn't matter . #
Right . #
Aye we'll see how we get on . #
Take care then . #
Bye . #
See you . #

 #
Oh I expect so , aye . #
Susan won't ring . #
She said to her in the week when she rung she won't ring until I thought it was like midnight last night she was getting in and she wasn't gonna ring till today but it'll be tomorrow she'll ring her . #
Surely is . #
Well I might be , I don't know . #
Bloody ballbag'll probably phone me in the morning or something . #
I might be going to er Ellesmere Port , there's coffin stones to get up , they've got er hoist thing there so I don't know . #
I might be there or I might be with Roy , I don't know . #
We might try and put all the on tomorrow and if they do they'll just work till they get them on . #
I don't know . #
what I was thinking . #
what I was thinking then . #
Right . #
I think she #
Only said who he invited . #
I said , I said have you invited Aunty Joan and them ? #
He said oh I've invited Aunty Joan but nobody else cos I didn't fancy any of the others . #
Yeah . #
But he hasn't invited any to the night . #
I think I might have his conscience by saying that I don't mind . #
I know but an extra four people's not gonna cost that much more is it ? #
You little sod . #
Yeah . #
Why I asked him is because he had a wedding invitation for Rob and Jen #
Oh aye . #
No . #
No #
Ram him off the road . #
And that's where the survey's gonna be , right in the middle is it ? #
Oh . #
So you wanna allow yourself a an hour and half really don't you ? #
Do you think , or not ? #
No . #
Oh aye that's right I heard it on the radio . #
Yeah . #
Can you put the stuff on the walls ? #
Yeah . #
Like a pin board thing ? #
Mm . #
Like a conference type #
Oh aye ? #
Yeah . #
So what did she say about the money when you tried her for less money ? #
Or didn't you actually say ? #
And it's actually in the like the council offices ? #
Yeah . #
Yeah . #
thing is with them Welshies they probably haven't tried to bloody they haven't got the sense . #
If somebody else was trying to book it , one of those Welshy types , they haven't got the sense to ask #
Which field's Min in ? #
Is he ? #
Do you wanna go or not or go straight to your nan's ? #
Mm . #
What do you mean his partner like ? #
Is it just like a little firm ? #
And this Michael's one of the partners in the firm ? #
Oh aye . #
What the hell do you wanna go to Smiths for ? #
Did you ? #
Is it much of a place , Caernarvon ? #
They have a market there don't there ? #
What and do a photocopy ? #
Ah . #
Claim it back off the firm ? #
Mm . #
In the pouring bloody rain and howling wind I expect . #
Did you find them all alright ? #
All round the houses . #
Mm . #
Mm . #
Oh god . #
Winning some bloody jobs aren't you . #
What have they done , dropped their prices ? #
Well when's these in Caernarvon , the end of April ? #
It's the weekend after 's wedding ? #
Mm . #
You'll be knackered . #
Into the ? #
You'll have to er take the registration of every bloody car ! #
Jesus god ! #
It's probably because they're taking over the er accident and emergency department from Clatterbrick it's shutting down and it's all going to Arrow Park . #
Well it is . #
That's what's happening , it was on the radio the other day . #
Well that's what you wanna , so much quicker wouldn't it , just say the Escort D five one four . #
I won't get off at this one , no ? #
I'll get off at the #
Be a big job that will . #
Loads of money , you'll be minted . #
Better that way though innit ? #
Days go #
Here I turn now do I ? #
Well where was the turning ? #
I've never #
I don't . #
Mm . #
Well he must be fiddling it cos he , he's never bloody worked it . #
No , I don't wanna see Jean . #
Oh she's there . #
She's doing the n #
Are we late ? #
the chips . #

She's probably asleep . #

You'd better put something on it . #
No I'm alright there . #
That's right . #
Yeah . #
Yeah . #
Oh just one ta . #
Aye , just one thanks . #
Yep . . . #
Oh aye . #
One . #
Please . #
It's already on them thanks . #
Is your nan okay ? #
And cream . #
Mm . #
Thank you . #
It ta tastes nicer out of a paper . #

alright with this thanks . #
No . #
No we're alright thanks . #
Anything . #
Whatever's easiest . #
Mhm . #
Probably . #
Fish is normally about one twenty odd , oh aye . #
The chips are fifty . #

Erm three sixty that would be one eighty . #
Mm . #
get pots of tea ? #
Is your nan having any ? #

Yep . #
Ooh come on . #
Aye . #
Yeah . #
Mm . #
No . #
It was a good idea of mine I thought . #
You'll have to check them teas , one's got a little bit less sugar than the other . #
I don't know . #
all mixed up now . #
Mm . #
No . #
Er ooh bit sweet innit ?square spoon . #
With a square spoon . #
Of er sugars #

Best had . #
Yes . #
Go on . #
Brookside . #
Is it ? #
Oh aye of course it is yeah . #
Robert Lindsey his name isn't it ? #
Plywood that . #
Aye . #
I can see plenty that one thanks . #
I'm only flicking through it . #
Aye #
She could go as often as she wanted to the clinic , but they won't come out to her #
and being that she's not very good on her legs well , she has to have one to come out . #
Well only by getting a lift to the clinic , yeah , that's the only way she could get there #
No it's only in Buckley #
but with us in work all the time , time we get home from work the chiropodist's gone #
well she can only get a taxi I suppose #
No there's no buses run there #
Mm #
Well you know what she's like , she's not very stylish on her legs is she ? #
Yeah #
Yeah #
Oh yeah #
Mm #
Ellesmere Port #
don't know how long for #
Not much left there now , no #
begging jester then #
Evening Leader Office #
There's football on this side #
Liverpool #
Yeah #
What's that ? #
Yeah , well , he's like any little kids I think #
there's no stopping them is there ? #
Mm #
No #
Yeah #
Yeah #
Yeah it has #
Twenty five #
Yeah #
Aye it's been nice coming up #
Only , we work the Good Friday but we have the Tuesday off #
so we'll have the Bank Holiday Monday off and the Tuesday #
It's late this year though Easter isn't it ? #
It will #
I think we're all ready for bed , we're all yawning #
We're all yawning I think we're all ready for bed #
No #
No #
She used to years ago but she doesn't bother any more #
now #
No #
Oh aye #
Well this is it #
Well if the weather breaks a bit now , get a bit of sun , be able to get out a bit , with a bit of luck #
Aye #
Aye #
Oh good #
Oh aye #
Been lovely seeing you too . #
Yeah , I think I might #
Yeah #
Yeah #
ta ta #
You did something to the catch before didn't you ? #
That's it ? #
Yeah #
Good morning Mart #
Just a #
Mm #
Had er , I was gonna say wasn't in the game , I just thought he was kind of harden #

Hey , switch that bloody thing off #
I hope you're not selling this the #
He was very lucky , as well , it just happened so many times he #
Yeah , but if there hadn't , there hadn't of given that goal away and they were pushing forward #
and they hadn't given that goal away , they'd of scored another in that half #
I think #
I think there's a lot of hope and promise #
Every time , er every time the #
broke down , the er #
Not quite as long as #
Yeah really bushy #
Yeah #
What , what I'm gonna do is erm #
just shave that bit there and #
Or just shave me tache off #
No not to a point #
sticking out of his head #
You know I just thought of something really stupid #

Ah , are you still stuffing yourself ? #
Yes thank you #
Well I don't , I don't really understand myself what it wants , so I'm not in a position to #
Erm , is that three eight one five oh no , no sorry that's the wrong extension , er have you any idea if anyone can get to #
alright , thank you er , no I'll come back shortly , what extension should I ask for first of all ? #
Three eight double one , okay thank you very much , bye #
goes away , everything according to plan #
He's at Halford today and then he goes on his holidays for a bit #
Well he's off tomorrow anyway #
and now we're short of paper #
No , there's nothing downstairs , well Steve said he had the lot , the last box #
Yeah #
I get #
Yeah #
Don't beat him up ! #
Oh . #
How did you know ? #
I was in the army . #
And ca ! #
And then he says , then he says , no , we went to and he's in the gym so #
and they left me behind ! #
And what the hell do you think ! #
! #
Normally like the isn't it ? #
With the #
you know , you can have #
I hate it where that girl is ! #
You know you're not gonna get back to sleep until you've been ! #
Buy an engagement ring . #
Ah ! #
How long have you known him ? #
He sent me er to renew his #
and some #
Aye ! #
Aye ! #
Try and avoid him . #
about eighty . #
I think she's right . #

No difficulty . #
The idea is that's the one tha that's generally . #
That #
Oh , that , that's just er that was er quite reasonable #
really . #
. #
Is he ? #
Do it yourself ! #
I know you ! #
Well jus haven't you got enough to be getting ? #
It's last years . #
I just . #
Does that mean I gotta phone Judge cap in hand ? #
I'll see him #
Well I'll see if I can the te telly I must have a . #
I think they were , were . #
I'll see er I'll see to . #
Good morning ! #
Can I speak to please ? #
Hello , is that Tammy ? #
Hi ! , #
hi , it's Rob from the Moore office . #
Erm I'm of er I'm been asked your #
insurance er #
certificate . #

The R A C book #
of . #
What about the er #
certificate and it's last year . #
Yeah , I'm sure I'm I've #
I think , I'm fairly sure you've er sent me one previously . #
Yeah , if you could send me I'd appreciate it . #
Okay ? #
Lovely , thanks a Tammy , yeah , and you . #
bye bye ! #
Tell Jan there's one on the way . #
See if there's a letter on the file . #
And if there is read through it and see the you know ,li and then Peter will . #
That were just the temporary passes for the motorway that we had to return to department . #
Er , . #
Well when they put they put sixty five staff before the surveys ? #
Well I dunno . #
Four two nine six . #
No . #
Yeah , smashing ! #
Er #
Documents erm , from first of January this year . #
I'll put that on this slip of paper . #
And there oh ! #
I want to see it's bloody silly ! #
So these agree ? #
I think we should have somebody in here you see . #
Erm so , put on here since January . #
So that re , will just be a couple of reports and something #
Alright ? #
So that that's of erm as big a task as we'd really like to . #
Ah , these agencies use them to . #