# When you go to your mum's tomorrow , or when we go out tomorrow we'll take it with us , in case we meet anybody I can be taping cos I can get as many people as I like , when you go up to Ken's take it with you , put it on your pocket , but then say to them , if you object we won't do it . # I've got to get as many people as I can . # The tape is already in that # Is it on ? # Oh , # Go on # excuse me # Oh what's happen then ? # Don't know what ? # Yeah # yeah # Oh no # Is that what she said ? # Oh she should of , why they addressed to you then ? # Did you check to see if that was going ? # Oh yeah it is # Well why should it # Don't she get herself in a # tiswas # does she # Was it good ? # Good # I tell me self just done that , I haven't even boiled the kettle silly me . # I don't know what I doing . # Hurry up Jonathan # I said hurry up . # Oh I # , # I don't know # You look marvellous # is it ? # Oh yeah . # Where did Matthew get it then ? # Oh # Jonathan are you going to start your tea please ? # It's gonna get cold # No # Well let me # You know what it is I bet they're pruning in the field # That leaves off , bet that's them out in that field messing about # Oh , they nearly got to , up to the roof aren't they ? # Now why haven't you been doing very well at school this week ? # Well you won't get that will you ? # Eh ? # Why haven't you been getting on very well then ? # I suppose you get some weeks like that when you don't did Miss get on to you then ? # Did you get anything on the # Oh I forget , forgot to get it # How did you get on at football ? # How many ? # Did they all behave ? # I know they are did Luke play ? # Oh , is that what's upset you this week ? # let that upset you . # not in then is he ? # there for you not for him . # Well why didn't he use yours and # , I don't mind , but # I didn't Matthew's football ? # Oh # But you're not that interested in football # Well yeah . # It's alright ,what else did you # Yeah did she realize that the two # Would you have # Did you get many chips today Jonathan from school ? # Did you ? # What did you have for sweet today ? # Weren't a lot of choice was there ? # Why was that ? # What # He must be # Now these hope there # It's a what ? # No # can't understand what you're saying . # What # Eleven # them for ? # Forgot to put the sugar in . # What you mean ? # Seems a bit # when she goes , yeah # Any more bread # Oh # a bit silly ain't it ? # Well it's got , erm Mike in it # do you want some of those # I wait on you lad , left , right and centre I do who's washing up tonight ? # You must be joking you must be joking , wish # huh , dad said he wished he did # do you want some blackberry Jonathan ? # Ooh , you got to make sure you've got your tickets next Friday then . # Hello , yeah ,for you # No , sounds like he's at home # No , no , say you might have some , # well see how you feel . # Alright . # Goodness me Jonathan # Oh help yourself # Do you want blackcurrant ? # Pardon ? # Yeah , # Oh I'm not messing about with that # Well # Oh yeah , I didn't mind wrestling but I don't like # yeah but it's that . # Oh # Oh # How long's Matthew had erm , Sky television then ? # You know what I've gone and done Jonathan ? # I've done them all strawberry , all blackberry I mean # Is that alright ? # Cor , that's lovely , great that whatever was you and John playing at ? # Dinner time at school # I don't know , said he . # What did he want # Did # Yeah who called it up then ? # He didn't # Expensive one that # Oh # Quartz ? # Oh # Oh that will be # No I wouldn't , too right # You should be # I go and get you some don't worry # I was on about the necklace and you said it was a bit pricey # there's another twenty five per cent off if you go in there tomorrow , so how much would that be ? # That was thirty six , if you take twenty four per cent off what's that ? # How much ? # Well I'll go and get it then # I'll get it then for her , for Christmas present # We'll do that tomorrow # Well we said we was going up to Wisbech . # No she ain't , cos she ain't coming down here for the and I told her that we would be nipping to town to so we can do it then when she ain't with me ,the offer's only on till tomorrow . # , pardon ? # Who's what friend ? # from me , you and Jonathan # Samuels # You told me that was Westgate last time I # Well she would if you told her , wouldn't she ? # I'm sure she would . # That's right , alright ? # Yeah we had this morning . # I don't know how you do that ? # Eat erm fruit , and the bread and butter together , I can't bear that bear that . # Well I don't think it's very nice . # What was it ? # What was it then ? # had something to say every day at school dinners . # I never cooked something every day the same . # Oh you mean perhaps I'd cooked jacket potatoes and you had jacket potatoes at school ? # Oh yes # well what was it ? # Yeah , but what is that ? # We had it at home as well # Oh I see what you mean # How come you got it on your own then ? # Vegetarians there are people who are aren't they ? # Oh they , they've never had them at school they have erm scrambled egg , they never have a proper egg # You know why don't you ? # Cos it's powdered . # It's powdered egg , they're not allowed to have , use raw eggs round school . # No , I suppose cos # of salmonella ain't it ? # That's right . # Do you ? # You make erm egg on toast as well don't you ? # Egg in the batter ? # You mean erm # scotch egg ? # Well you wouldn't like that surely , cos you don't like sausages . # Oh yeah # Yeah # Well I hope you are different # what you mean ? # Them or these , erm erm brown one perhaps # yeah # I don't know what they're called love , I don't know what they're called Jonathan # Jonathan is a weird child at times # Well the fifty P ones look better I must admit # No , nor would I # six # I'm watching the news in a little while # What you put that somebody please # I'll do me ironing perhaps in the morning # Oh was on today's on quarter to six . # on please Jonathan # yes , you've got all tomorrow to watch that , I should save it wouldn't you dear ? # Jonathan what about tidying yourself up you just have out , # Well she said she'd be back just after six . # Oh , she got # Yeah , but she'll be back at six she said you know # So we're not at John tonight then have we ? # What was I gonna say to you ? # Here you are # Well yeah , and I , it's a bit short notice keep can keep cancel . # It's not very fair is it ? # Well I don't think so , did you put that tape in right , I bet you did # oh it's oh , so what # So what's Ivan , happened about Ivan's little boy then ? # Or was it his little girl ? # Didn't he have an asthma attack then ? # Did he actually have an asthma attack then ? # Does the other one stopped having it now then asthma ? # The oldest one has # how # What ? # What ? # Yeah # dunno # you know what they're like # I told him the price when he ordered them # and he knows he's not like you doing for money , cos I shan't be very pleased # Who's he working for now then , double glazing again ? # I reckon er when it is # however did they employ him ? # He's had more jobs than I've had hot dinners # Well you , that van's always up there . # Think they go round travelling then like travelling salesman or something # they've got a place down at Markets ain't they ? # I didn't think they were in a big way # Who's being barred ? # Well what about the Mr then ? # Do you believe # Oh . # Oh # Oh I didn't do you the # yeah . # What ? # Yeah , I said I'd up here tomorrow didn't I ? # What's he got now ? # Surely ain't got any money # Why ? # That's not fair though is it on people , you know , people through that # that's what I was thinking about like that girl you know , typical , about that car # about the er , Orion # did you actually put down on that form ? # Oh , but you didn't # But Susan was saying she can't see how one thing's got anything to do with the other , she didn't go joy riding # She was saying she wouldn't let it rest . # That's what I said , well we've got , that'll be in her # Yeah , # Oh yeah , that's right , yeah but odd really # that , that bloke has got , she said if that was me I'd write to the Chief Constable about it # Yeah , and what happened they lost the letter # that needn't of come to a head like that really . # Twenty past two , why ? # Well it later anyway no . # Jonathan , Jonathan , dad wants to watch the news in a minute please , so hurry up and change it over You'd think they'd save that You don't know , I wouldn't be surprised you will well that's marvellous isn't it ? # I said I think we're gonna have to start still doing what we said , erm , getting the money beforehand I think . # You know it's ridiculous isn't it ? # Well you don't bleeding know whether them other people turned up do you ? # Did your mum take it to let you know ? # Oh Sarah should have her roof on by this week did you hear what I said ? # Sarah should have her roof on this weekend . # They're soon gonna put the roof on , yeah , soon , soon it # no , but as soon as they've got their thingy in the they should be off . # They've got someone standby to do it or something . # Great , I said well that's the best thing really this time of year to get it # all covered in # well I would have thought so anyway . # Why's that ? # Oh never mind . # Was it good ? # Oh I see . # Well that sounds good then . # He said he gets brain damage I said well that sounds good then . # Can you just put the freezer stuff up ? # Well you should have turned the heating on . # Mm . # Do you like profiteroles Sue ? # Profiteroles . # Oh yeah , that looks nice . # Mum'd like that . # What have you got in your little side pots ? # Oh they had the hazelnut ones . # Tut oh ! # What ? # What book ? # Cor ! # It does . # Yeah , it's quite hard . # Pass me your mum's book . # Pass your mum's book . # Oh she got that from Gateway . # Is that where you've been ? # I know . # It doesn't surprise me . # I've still got your bottle of champagne in there Susan . # Erm # I thought Susan had got the kettle on so I unpacked these . # Oh , I need them What darling ? # Yeah . # Excuse me Jonathan , let me just # What ? # Jonathan put it on . # Yeah . # Where do you get your cake from , Superkey # I see that in there the other day and I wondered were them cards alright for you ? # I've got more cards . # Yes I can . # I can smell it . # That's up this corner behind me . # Yeah well what you've gotta do is put a bowl of vinegar down there . # Yeah well put a bowl in there and let it stand and that and that'll erm go into the vinegar . # You ought'a got some of that cat litter stuff . # You can get some spray that you put on your cat litter tray to deodorize it . # No but I mean if mummy put a # You can write my cards out for me if you like . # I know you love the job . # I don't know what they're like , I just # I just went for the price . # Yeah I know some of them are more suitable . # Yeah well , he can have the ones what are suitable for him . # Oh yeah . # No I can't say I . # What ? # I've seen that card before . # Now these have gotta go in the freezer Geoff . # Would you just do it then I'll make you a cup of coffee . # Is that what you're having for your tea . # Cos I'm having that french bread . # There's some ham and tomato and lettuce in . # And that can go in the freezer , what ?aah . # Erm have I got one set ou cos I was gonna leave one set out case you wanted # Yup . # Yeah , that's alright . # What's that mate ? # Oh yeah . # Think they're quite good . # I only looked , I did take quickly a look at them but , you know I thought oh I ain't got I didn't really have time to mess about for long you know . # Yeah they're not bad for that . # It says family selection so that's what it means well for adults and children . # Er # Yeah there is a few about here somewhere . # Wait a minute I'll just get this done then I'll make you another . # Didn't they ? # Oh ! # Was you disappointed ? # That don't take long to unpack it really , does it ? # Yeah it do , it full . # Which one ? # Where ? # I found it in the car . # I wiped it . # Cos I thought well I remember what you said about cold sores . # There's a good film on tonight Sue . # What's erm something up to jaws innit or something ? # I'd like to see it . # He didn't actually say . # Till , I suppose till the same time tomorrow I suppose . # He didn't actually say . # Yeah cos it don't get there # I don't know what they were . # They're nice dishcloths # Good . # Well I'm ever so pleased what I bought you today . # No , well tell him . # Put it here look . # He's just er tidying his clothes up . # I hope he's putting them on hangers . # Sat here and I thought what i whatever am I gonna do ? # And I thought oh I know I'll have a look and see if I # How long you been here ? # Oh ! # Yeah . # Well Mr said he hadn't been , sort of erm himself all week . # I wondered if that was hurting a little bit . # Yeah could have been . # All his mates . # So I think probably that's what it was , but I don't know . # Well Luke's only reserve . # Don't think Jonathan Jonathan wouldn't have minded if he was in a reserve , you know ? # Well no not really Sue . # Well they can't pick him just because they like him . # Well no er and he didn't seem that bothered anyway . # Nothing . # Do you want them ? # Well you can take them if you like . # I to make one . # Do you want another one Sue ? # Just got to get . # Where's me other box of cards ? # Let's put them in there then I can put them upstairs . # You can write them for me when . # You're not you know you like writing them . # I'll show you something in a minute . # I don't know whether this is a bruise or what but this morning my leg was burning . # That was burning and the next minute that was black . # There was a load of rubbish . # Go and tidy your rubbish up darling . # There's a good boy . # Yeah well mum had to go # upstairs quick , didn't I Jonathan ? # So I got my I got my first christmas present . # Yours . # Oh no , that's the third . # Just wash it . # Oh yeah we're prams and toys to have his transformer checked . # On that you know that racing track ? # The transformer's had it . # I said and he's he's only played with it about six or seven times so we're gonna she told us to write to Hornby's about it . # She said there isn't a flicker . # She said it's not # Have you ? # Why don't why don't you get out the way ? # Well every time I go to do something Susan I have to keep walking round him . # Why don't you play that side if he wants # Can you just put that orangejuice somewhere for me please . # Well I don't want everybody to start well I got it for christmas really . # I don't want although it don't really matter I suppose . # Just put it on top # I said I said well now someone can buy him the other one for christmas . # He's got one # Well you can save something on here look . # Wrestling save the world wrestling premiums . # What's that mean ? # I was up before Geoff this morning see . # D D Dougan . # Yeah . # I bet he could have got it cheaper if he'd have waited . # Yeah well only cos Matthew told him they were . # Bloody peerage for him . # Well I should think she has . # It's cold # Yeah . # Well that's like her . # She wouldn't take no notice . # Pat ? ? # Yeah . # I wouldn't be surprised if he does . # Let's face it Geoff he ain't paid you . # Do you know he rang twice last # Geoff had to get up and down last night to pick him up . # He had the bloody gall to # ring me today and say that's got diarrhoea , he'll keep the car today but he don't want it tomorrow can you find someone else who wants it . # I said that's the last time . # Go and pick him up . # Geoff said if I hadn't have wanted the money I wouldn't have bothered . # Well we ain't got paid anyway yet . # No I didn't th I should imagine , I thought he said you didn't , I would imagine he gets paid at the end of the month . # Well that ain't a very good firm is it really ? # But then I suppose they don't get paid until the people # Where's mum's little black bag Jonathan ? # My bag . # Karate ? # I've lost my handbag anybody . # I don't want to leave it in the car . # Oh well perhaps I left it up I'll take these up while I'm . # We seen the end of it . # Oh it was # Erm what day you wa me and Geoff'll take will take your erm # Your mac to Morris . # He's doing it again . # Cos I thought I'd lost my money didn't I ? # I dunno how we could do it before Friday , not unless erm # You would ? # Ooh that smell of like cat is awful in here . # That ain't . # That's near that washing machine . # I shall have to have the washing machine out . # No # That is definitely in that corner . # Here you are . # This is what I always # That will do it . # I know # No , I go like that . # I stick a bit of that in . # Yeah but it is ! # But she keeps doing it she done it again last night , didn't smell till yesterday . # The kettle's not on . # Oh no it isn't . # Well yeah but the only point is Susan she perhaps don't like the smell of orange but then she might go in my room and pee in there if she didn't have nowhere else to go . # I'll tell you what it is , that's since you've had that ginger cat she's done it . # She is frightened of that ginger cat Susan . # She's petrified of it . # Well you can't tell her that can you ? # Are you off then ? # See you in a minute then . # Oh I feel shattered today . # I ain't done a stroke of housework . # all your christmas shopping ? # How much was that ? # Well do you think she'd want another one ? # What are they ? # Well I'm not gonna get her one of them am I ? # You can't get it though can you ? # You don't think that teapot is a good idea then ? # They're all in . # There was two little boys come in his age come in # and er they was # looking at them . # I said are these all the craze at the moment ? # He said yeah . # Wrestling . # Yeah . # I've got yours Val's and Sarah's and some of his . # Some of yours . # No cos I didn't know you wanted them till last week did I ? # Someone 'll buy you some . # And you want a vide erm computer games as well don't you ? # You'll have to break down what I want # Oh . # Well that's something somebody could get him . # How much is it ? # You make enough noise . # Don't be silly . # That little pussy cat come from the pet shop . # I just wear him cos I quite like him . # He reminds me of muggins . # I got this out of mother's catalogue . # Trouble is that picks up the dust . # Picks up my navy coat , cor don't they pick up the bits ? # Where you going ? # Yeah # not get up early in the morning ? # I'm not getting up early tomorrow . # Well I ain't gonna cook dinner . # We're gonna go erm # So I gotta get your birthday present now . # What was it lis on your list ? # I can't remember what you put on your list . # You never give me the list . # Oh do you know , it's a funny thing when I had my ears pie ear pierced years ago that poured blood # the other day . # I reckon there was a little blood clot or something behind it . # A mole . # That is a mole . # Yeah but it is a mole , I can assure you . # That's brown . # Moles do don't they ? # I'm tired . # I've been up since quarter to five . # I done the ironing this morning . # Well no , I shan't get up ear definitely shan't get up till about eight tomorrow . # Well I did do all my housework , you'd never know I'd done it . # Just I've been all round look . # I changed it this morning , I've had all them glasses out # I had all my corner cabinet that corner cabinet out and put it down this end cos I've wanted to move it cos I've wanted me christmas tree . # What did he say ? # Why would you go in there for ? # Is that that one who died ? # Yeah . # Yeah , that transformer . # Do you know how much a new one of them is for that game , that ? # Twenty three pound . # So she said write to Hornby and tell them . # That is Hornby . # What is it then ? # Well it should tell you on it . # I got one christmas present . # Ow ! # Wait a minute , hold on I'll . # No , well I don't think we'll be able to # because erm we ain't got # Has Mr bought anything see we ain't got Mr in for Sunday . # Have you ? # he hasn't booked . # Because he's booked it for Monday you see . # No well you see Geoffrey's booked it out . # And of course I went and , I I never handed in my book well of course I went and booked the other one out . # So Geoffrey's gonna ring the bloke when he he's gonna try and get hold of Mr later on and ring him because we've got to let this other man know you know he can't have it . # Yeah but we ain't got it here for Sunday you see . # But he knows # Well no I haven't but you see he's got it Monday . # We usually have it Sunday to Monday . # So # Geoff's gonna ring him and perhaps # perhaps be home soon from wherever he's gone # Yeah well he might not be home till late you see so we've got we've really got to wait so Geoff will probably ring this man when he come home . # Alright then ? # Oh alright . # Yeah Yeah . # Okay then ? # Yeah bye . # I know . # Oh it ain't getting very warm in here yet is it ? # We'll go and sit in the room soon # if it gets warmer in there . # I meant to tell you # No I'm like that . # Right , let's tidy up a bit Jonathan I # Yeah . # We never did did we ? # That looks a bit tidier don't it ? # Well he will do if he that . # Jonathan . # You wanna come and feed your . # Here Jonathan . # Whole load for it . # Make sure you properly . # She is absolutely petrified of that cat . # Literally petrified . # It doesn't seem to be getting very warm in here to me . # Well it's only on about seventeen . # Twenty . # Well they have theirs on one con continuously don't they ? # See we don't have our heating on continuously . # Well I was cold down mum's last Sunday . # Oh yeah . # Yeah well there's three of us have baths . # Jonathan . # Don't keep banging . # And her mother does all the all the washing for the when she us does hairdressing does all the washing , all them towels , hangs them out . # Buys this , buys that . # She uses her mother's electric . # Telephone . # Mind you Val said I can't help her out sort of financially cos she hasn't got it , but she said I can he , I said well you do help her out financially . # I said in that way . # She said well I can't give her any money cos I haven't got any . # Yeah so I mean really the twenty five pound a week she's not paying her mother she could go to pay a mortgage . # Twenty five pound a week . # What , for the boys ? # That's still thirty five pound a week . # That's a hundred and forty pound a month . # So twelve months that's twelve # Well that's why she don't need to go to work innit ? # Well I couldn't live off my son like that . # Mind you she is , let's fa she does help that youngest one out . # She is helping him out cos he ain't got a job . # So you know she she said he gets it back in the long run . # Oh she said he absolutely loves Tesco's . # She said he's hoping they're gonna give him full employment . # Yeah . # I don't like shopping in there , let alone working in there . . # Well I've done that job stacking shelves . # That's a # and you , it was alright , and guess what he stacked the first day he was there ? # Turkey ! # Yeah ! # She said he said er I couldn't believe it but she said he didn't mind cos it was all frozen . # So she said weren't it marvellous . # Well worked with Geoff at Turner's Turkeys he lasted three days . # Yeah . # His wife ? # His mother ! # Duane . # Hook it on . # That's what I thought . # Well wouldn't do very much well at that cos too short . # Mm . # He said he was always on another planet . # What was that thing come through from Les this morning ? # Do you think you'll get some tax back Geoff ? # How much will you get back then ? # Oh so you might get some of that back ? # When should you get it though ? # In the next few weeks ? # Mm . # Let's hope it does then . # Well that'll be just right for thingme for christmas then , some more money . # He wants you to ring him you know . # Ring him Geoff because of # Yeah . # Well that's what I thought myself after you'd been there ring him then . # What you hoping then that the building society are gonna lend you the money so you can pay your bank draft off ? # How much were the repayments on that thing ? # The worst thing we ever did . # No not yet . # No he's not gonna pay them off . # He's paying what he ow got behind . # Yeah but then he'll , we should be able to manage then to pay the mortgage and pay them and keep on the level peg . # That's right . # So we're paying # Yeah . # That's right # Well that's what he's said . # He'll p , all he , all the money we get we'll just put into the building society and pay the bills from the building society . # Geoff can go # They're ha quite happy to do it once a month but like you said what they will not do erm obviously is to have a lot of sort of things like standing orders and that sort of thing . # They don't wanna know about that . # Yeah but you don't want to do standing orders then do you ? # Yeah but if you if you # Yeah but Geoff if you keep a record when you took money in when you draw it out . # We'll keep a complete record of it . # Yeah but then if he had to find anything then # They're gonna want to know why . # Yeah but then # yeah but yeah but then on the other hand , let's face it our business # has fluctuated . # That's been on a real high and then gone down to a low to nothing . # So you don't get many names in that book anyway . # And that is how it has been . # Yeah . # Yeah ? # Yeah but what # Yeah but if you do it above board I can't see # Cory oil ? # Yeah but I can't see how they can say anything as long as you've got a legitimate receipt for it . # See that you have done . # Well how do you go on then ? # Yeah but on the # yeah but on the other hand Geoff if they took that attitude with everybody , nobody would # Well why don't you just prewarn them before you're gonna do it and say look I'm no longer gonna use this bank I'm er # Yeah alright Jonathan # Jonathan . # Geoff . # there's Joe . # For you . # No , . # Alright then . # Ah , what time have you gotta do that ? # What time do you finish ? # Cor that's late Ashley isn't it ? # Aren't you tired the next day ? # Yeah . # Does Jody swim as well ? # How did he get on ? # Oh . # Oh . # Come on in Jonathan . # Don't be silly . # Out his own money . # And who is he ? # What are you gonna do now then ? # Do you like them Ashley ? # Oh . # Are you gonna sort yourself out then Jonathan ? # So I can # so I can get on . # What are you gonna do , play in your bedroom or go outside or what ? # What do you wanna do ? # Come on then cos I've got a lot to do mate . # Do as you like . # You can play in your bedroom if you like . # Oh alright then . # I say talk of the devil , I was just say Mrs thought you and her were gonna get together . # Oh yeah . # Well I didn't get what I wanted to get . # I've been trying to find Sally to do your mac . # We've got it in , Geoff's got it in the car we're gonna try again on the way home . # Sue's , Sally's shortened Susan's mac . # We're early today . # We are . # Oh we went and had a wimpy today . # Does it ? # Nothing . # I've , we was working out how long I've had this jumper . # Six years I've had that . # Well I haven't # What do you say ? # Jack gone back ? # Tell Juney what you told me I nearly # choked over me dinner today . # Nearly collapsed . # And his name's Alex . # I said to mum she needn't , mum didn't get none of the bleeding details . # What ? # Knock . # I got one . # We di have run out you see . # I tell you he's got a lot of blooming skeletons in his cupboard ain't he ? # I # It's odd but no I said he's a bloody dark horse # him or Joey . # He's as bad . # Well , he says one thing to Emmie and something else to me . # And that time we saw him he said he definitely weren't going on that holiday . # Next thing I know he's disappeared for four weeks into America . # Isn't he ? # Hey ? # I said in one breath he tells me he's not going to erm going on holiday with Linda . # And then the next little breath he's off to America and you don't see him for four weeks . # Yeah I know ! # ain't got any more gossip to tell you . # No , she was chatting this morning and that . # I'll have a look out there see what's out there in a minute . # I'm going out there in a minute . # What's he still chewing ? # He won't get that till his seventeen . # How's Auntie Alice ? # What , ain't they nice to her still ? # Did she speak to you ? # Yeah . # Did you tell mum ? # Well if he wants . # I don't bother me . # If he drinks it now , today he won't have it tomorrow will he ? # It's up to you . # Oh find me your list cos I wanna know what to get you for your birthday . # I've got your christmas present . # Does she know ? # No , haven't told her . # Hey look I've got an envelope in Geoff's book . # The money's fallen out but there was # Yeah . # Don't knock it off . # There you are look . # What you gotta say then father ? # Has this gotta stay on here ? # I've had a phone call from Pam this morning . # No she was just asking about christmas presents . # Well she said erm tell you . # What sort of things we like . # Well she must have rang # Did she ring you before me then ? # Or # Oh I tell you what else I like . # Yeah I said I liked them # Jon pop your shoes off . # Yeah but yours ain't very clean . # Yeah but # Well I bought her a vase but I said # pair of them chunky earrings in . # Cor that's a smelly cigarette . # Oh no it's the match I think I can smell . # Who ? # He does not . # Well he don't want , you don't want to do that . # A pretend one ? # Yeah but you don't wanna get in the habit of holding something in your hand like . # Cut your nose off if you start that lark . # Yeah well cos that does something to your lungs don't it ? # if I'd have known , I'd have gone down there . # Well if I'd known I'd gone down there . # Down the back , if you # Tell nanny what that means cos I asked you yesterday . # He bought himself # He wants some more of them . # So if Pam don't , wants to know what to buy him , he wants some of them . # Yeah . # Cos if Pam don't know what to buy him she could buy him one of them or two of them or whatever she # I don't think she'll buy you three . # That's Wisbech though innit ? # Where was you # where was you then when I saw you going out in your car ? # Oh . # Cor he pipped and nearly made me ju # He pipped me mum and made me jump out of my bloody skin . # Well that was said last week it was going up . # Has it really ? # Oh . # Mm . # No . # No . # I thought you weren't staying the night though ? # Yeah alright . # Well I'm up anyway , you know that . # What time did you get up this morning ? # Yeah . # No that was terrible . # Yeah but I missed the flipping bit how he killed it . # How does he kill it ? # back no he said and it was dad'd tell you more he he said # only got one eye . # He said when I looked at it was coming backwards . # Yes ? # Yeah . # Yeah . # You'll break it . # Did you see The Generation Game ? # I watched that last night # I watched that for a cha , we watched that for a change last night cos we watch Blind Date . # I think I like that better than # I'm getting fed up with Blind Date . # Well I don't know whether I think she's having it still . # Why ? # Well I dunno . # What do you say , it's no good to me ? # You did ? # Oh . # They're not mucky ! # They're clean I'll have you know , look how shiny they are . # They're not dirty . # Hot feet , yeah . # His . # What was Pam on about yesterday then ? # Father . # What was Pam on about ? # Oh dear what's happened there ? # Well she abuses the woman . # Well . # Get back ! # Oh no ! # I've got the key . # No you ain't got the new one cos I've got it . # The old one I've given him # Yeah cos I was # thinking about that . # All the time we keep losing them little stubs you wanna leave the gr the whole complete thing on then we won't lose them . # Quarter to two Geoff . # You've got time . # Now which one's ours ? # One's Pete's and one's ours . # You get a # Take them both . # I had it on a little bit of elastic band and I've , I've lost it . # Geoff . # Batteries again . # For that . # That's flicking . # Oh no they're not , them batteries ain't no good . # It's a tape recorder . # Well you better bring me two back just in case . # Just in the kitchen drawer , you know where I keep my club things ? # Yeah , it's flickering now . # Where I keep all my club things at the end there where the medicine thing is . # Yeah . # Yeah well it don't matter . # Th that should carry on but them , them batteries isn't any good . # Oh ! # Well no . # She said you can't talk when it's on . # He don't like it . # She said you're going to the V E T's . # No . # No don't do that Jonathan . # Oh yeah . # Yeah but you do , you only # Well now would them girl would them girls say , she must have said more than that mother . # You know what she's like . # Well she does cause a lot of # Well why the hell does she # Which shop does she work in ? # Well I wouldn't have thought she'd have gone in a shop like that anyway cos there's some more expensive stuff in there . # Yeah but the whole point is # I mean she's always saying she's always saying how you know she , oh my kids this , my kids that . # Well if that woman loses her job through what Pam has said she's not gonna be very nice to her children is she ? # Well Paul don't like never used to like it . # Well that ain't her fault . # Mm . # You what Jonathan ? # You don't like her ? # Oh . # They ran after them . # No he's not in the field , is he Jonathan ? # Nobody . # Well he likes to , I don't know whether nobody's cleared up the field , that looks a mess . # Yeah . # I thought Liz Taylor was dead ? # What ? # Well if you want one , have one . # Don't let us stop you . # Winnie ? # Aah ! # Why , what's on Sky ? # Oh . # Oh . # I see . # I'm surprised father ain't had it . # Jonathan do no . # Hey , when have you been treating yourself to that one then ? # Oh . # He keeps buying all these things . # People could buy them . # Oh . # Oh I see . # Have you seen it ? # Oh . # No because they're in a plastic cover aren't they ? # Which one's that ? # Oh . # Jonathan . # Don't keep doing that . # Yeah no don't . # Yeah alright . # Cos that picks it up . # Whatever does Geoff Geoff ain't bothered if she does your . # Oh I shouldn't worry about it . # I do it . # No , suppose not . # . # No that's alright . # You want to hear it . # How much ? # I like them Chippendales , I think they're nice . # Wonder why they're called Chippendales ? # Well I suppose Chippendales is er antique furniture innit ? # They're male strippers . # Would you like to see them Sue ? # Are they ? # Cor Sue if ever you get any tickets to see them , we'd better go and see them . # He's still up there look . # Skeletor ? # He-man . # I reckon that was one of the then . # Did you did you do any more ? # I'll perhaps get up there next Sunday and do it . # If it's a nice day I'll go up . # Yeah well I'm lighter than you aren't I ? # Do you know mum we're do Geoff's got he's done all down the sides , all round the back so he's he's threequarters of the way # Yeah but you've done all round the kitchen bit haven't you ? # And all that # and he's now going up the point of the house but he can't get no further . # So I've gotta go and do that point bit . # So I said well if I go up me being light , I'll go up and he holds the ladder # Well he went on it . # He did it . # Yeah but I said Geoff said well he what did he use ? # I said well that I said but he's a lot taller than you Geoff # isn't he ? # He's got the height to do it . # Big . # Yeah about Bobby's stomach around isn't he ? # What Brian ? # He's quite big , Brian is isn't he ? # Oh no . # No I haven't told him . # Sue you tell him cos you know how the story goes . # No . # Geoff . # I wonder who the ? # Yeah but he did go out with a girl there for a while didn't he ? # In London . # They reckon she was # What is it Jonathan , what are you doing ? # So you ask . # What's he got mum ? # No don't # No he don't like children Jonathan . # He's frightened . # No erm Fuji Juji she'll play with you , look . # Yeah so it sounds as , he's got a lot of skeletons in his cupboard . # I think we could write a book about our family , what goes on with someone ha going out with someone else and blimey ! # So do I . # Haven't they just . # Yeah but he ain't rejected this kidney he's had has he ? # Cor he looks # He cut him up or something didn't he ? # So he was waiting for him ? # It's surprising thumping him in the back didn't kill him with the kidney failure innit ? # Did they have the ambulance and that ? # And they found him on the floor ? # But that that bloke , that bloke he'll thump anybody won't he Geoff ? # He used to carry on with that # carry on with that girl up the road there didn't he ? # Yeah . # What's she like now ? # Is she married ? # Yeah I was telling mum . # I said we could get get our house inside it . # Twice . # Well believe it or not that tells you how people are lucky . # They've bui got out a new what is it ? # A new roof tile . # And this firm he thinks because he's gonna have his roof done with these roof tiles , these new type they're gonna give him them ! # To show them . # And he's gonna get his house re-roo # all roofed for nothing . # I said my god ! # Cor ! # Money goes to money . # Well no . # Don't put that on there Jonathan . # It don't play . # And build # No , it's further round # And he's gonna all them # Yeah but he never picked an we did . # We picked them . # He never sold any of them . # Never sold a plum at all . # Yeah but he was s that was him who was saying they use a lot of plums and puree stuff in babyfood . # But now they're not using plums any more , they're using marrow . # Cos it's cheaper . # So , well you imagine what go into bloody babyfoods ? # Yuk . # That's all water and starch isn't it ? # No it goes moul goes mouldy # very quick . # Yeah . # What you mean ? # But it was mouldy ! # Geoff's mum got me a piece of cheese last week from Superkeys . # On the Friday . # I opened it on Saturday and it was mouldy . # Wrapped up and we thought that had perhaps been # Oh yeah cos he said he'd # I did press it . # Perhaps I didn't press it hard enough . # Are you supposed to press them at the same time ? # on there . # Yeah . # Taboo ? # Tayboo . # Aah ! # That's orange juice and we we had a free sample one year . # Them , that girl give a free sample . # Orange and erm oh like a vod # What is it , vodka orange and # and something else . # Jonathan don't do that mate . # Well do you know # Cor . # Yeah . # What was I saying ? # Yeah and we was looking at the the wines and spirits in there . # Cos I like that , that erm Lambrusco # wine . # Wine . # It's a white wine , it's ever so ni # Lambresco . # And in there how much was it ? # In Gateways . # That was three pound # Yeah two forty nine was the ordinary wine . # And it's two pound in my village shop . # So I said to Geoff I'll get it up the village shop . # Yeah but you could get Lambresco again # but non-alcoholic . # And that was what ? # That was only one forty nine a bottle . # Which is cheap cos a lot of non-alcoholic wines are expensive . # What do you like to drink ? # Not bothered ? # No . # ? # Oh I might have one of them # You've got some . # Joey bought you some . # I ain't drunk mine yet . # I ain't even started it . # I got a bottle of gin a bloke bought me three years ago . # That should be some powerful stuff . # Bugger me . # That was bloody revolting . # We tried it . # Oh my god ! # Don't hurt granddad's toes Jonathan . # What ? # Tabasco . # Well it just suddenly come to me . # I knew I'd seen it but I'd never tried it . # Oh what is that then ? # That's orange juice and what then ? # I think it's orange juice and rum . # White rum . # You know erm # That's # Yeah but you could put something with it if you wanted . # Oh Geoff it's dreadful in there . # Oh the smoke hit you , don't it mum ? # Well when I go , I went u I just won't have washed my hair on Sundays cos if I go there to get mum , I know damn well my hair's gonna stink , so I might as well not bother . # are they ? # You'd like everything . # She lovely for her age ? # We've got a picture of her in the health club in a leotard doing a pose like that . # In a white leotard . # And she's right , as you go down the # corridor you go to the studio at the end then the toning tables there . # If you look down the corridor there's a big picture of her # on the end wall in this white leotard . # And then I always say I definitely . # She's over fifty you know . # Mind you , you don't know how much help they have do you ? # Where is that ? # I was just # I done a one the other day that was twenty five pence it was some charity thing . # You'd got # What you had to do they're making a giant they're making a giant # christmas pudding . # And you've got to guess how much it will weigh . # So I put seven hundred and sixty five # pound five ounces . # And the first prize is two hundred # fifty pounds worth of carpet . # So I thought I'll have a new carpet in my hall . # Yeah . # What are them three doing ? # Whatever would he win ? # Why ? # Why ? # Er erm # it's alright still is it ? # aren't we ? # Well I did , the other week I'll # We'll have to sort that out soon won't we ? # Yeah cos otherwise spend a lot more aren't we ? # Well he sai he did say he was gonna come and see you about this money . # Well yeah and then # that's besides of what he's # Yeah ? # Well perhaps you can just forget one of them and do the one . # Yeah . # Oh Susan does look a # peculiar colour . # That's that lady's . # Oh wait a minute , let me put me feet up . # . # Oh that's better . # Was she really ? # Bless her . # . # Touch wood I wouldn't get as fat as Mrs . # Oh crumbs . # don't worry . # I'll pick them up . # Is she ? # Cor and the brickwork # I'll tell you something that's better brickwork than that is beautiful brickwork . # No , she's got sort of a medium brick but she's got a brown mortar . # But that , that that is innit Geoff ? # I've seen , I've I've not seen brickwork like it . # It is immaculate . # That is really good innit Geoff ? # Well he's not piecework is he ? # Well it's only a bungalow is it ? # There's three men been working on it all the time . # I get fed up with it . # I may go to bed early and read me books . # Oh if I was me and I was on my own I'd ha I'd have to have the telly in the bedroom . # I tell you what I'd like to do in Jonathan's . # You know he's got his telly standing on that dressing table ? # What I want , you can bu # You can buy a little thing # My portable aerial works lovely . # What I want to do # Course you do . # Well I'll get a lo well # that telly was mine but I've got a lovely picture when I used to have it in the kitchen . # I used to sit there # Yeah . # No aerial . # That was a nice telly that . # Yeah . # Yeah . # Yeah well what I want for Jonathan's bedroom , you can buy them . # You put them in the sort of the corner , Mr 's got one , you extend your telly . # Yeah well one of them'd be handy for Jonathan's bedroom # No , not too high # Yeah to put that portable telly on and then he's got all the space on the top for his computer . # Cos there ain't a lot of space for the is there ? # Well yeah we could I tell you what # we could put on . # We could put under there to hang some bits and pieces up , some of them little sticker things . # Then you can hang some up under # Like mum's got her tea towels on . # Or put some well I don't wanna start drilling holes in it . # What do you wanna hang on it then ? # His dressing table . # Yeah well mum's yeah but you can get them # Well a desk . # You can get them little hooks like I hang my tea cloths on . # Some pretty little ones . # If you put it underneath the desk , a few of them . # And then the light gun could slot in that . # Pardon ? # A stollen ? # Never tried it . # You're not making a christmas cake are you ? # I've got a dundee cake . # Well they do # Well I got a little Dundee cake . # Well I ain't bothered cos Geoff'll eat it for his lunch . # You like a drop of port don't you Geoff ? # Mm . # Well do you know if I'd thought about it # No don't Jonathan . # If I'd have thought about it , that wedding cake she give me # If I'd have took that icing off that cake was as moist as anything , I could have re-marzipanned that # and re-iced that for christmas . # But Geoff has eaten it . # I I sent his # I sent his friend , cos his friend loves cherries # so I sent his friend bi when I cut it there's some bits got ever so many cherries in so I sent his friend up with the cherries in . # And what did you do ? # Give him the cherries and ate the cake and then Geoff told him . # And Geoff was # and Geoff was eating them . # I shall put him a bit in tomorrow though . # He don't have no dinner . # His wife don't pack him up # no dinner . # He's huge ! # No . # No . # She come downstairs well not for the first half hour . # She came downstairs , she slopped all the way through to the kitchen made herself a cup of tea and sat # down n yeah she was dressed sat down and ha she didn't even , she walked past Auntie Alice , she didn't even say good morning grandma good morning nan or anything . # And then she slopped herself down , got a fag and just about choked me and Auntie Alice out and then she did start to speak . # So well she obviously needs a fag and a cup of tea before she # Well that was quar that was about twenty past eleven . # was still in bed . # Well Auntie Alice said you can't wonder they stay in bed . # She said they bought theirselves a a bottle of brandy last night and erm # some Babycham and she said they'd sat there and drank a bottle of brandy and Babycham all night she said . # Well they have erm three bottles of lager on a Saturday night and they're them big bottles like that , you know them plastic bottles ? # Three bottles they drink between the two of them . # Couldn't you think of that ? # We had , that's like we had a letter the other day we had to sign for Jonathan . # That and I said to Geoff what's D O B ? # Yeah . # Dob . # Yeah well I I said to Geoff I thought about it , but I did that come to me quite quickly but Geoff couldn't think of it could you Geoff ? # Yeah . # Mm . # Blimey . # How confusing . # Why do you have to do it over Marks and Spencers ? # What's the time ? # Yeah we shall have to go soon Geoff cos you've gotta take that man back . # And then I'm # We've gotta see if we can get Susan's coat drop in . # If anybody's there . # Well if they're not there I'll ask her to ring me # tomorrow morning . # Well yeah I'm trying my best Susan . # I've tried twice . # But that is easier to leave it at Pam's you see . # Then Sally can pick it up . # Cos I don't know what state , I don't know whether Sally's gone back to work yet or not . # Well she had # sort of virtually nervous breakdown . # Dunno . # Well # Oh yeah . # You see she was being si she's been sick continuously day and night . # Sally . # Sally . # Sally . # Yeah . # Dunno . # Emma what ? # No . # Well she must be thirteen . # She's about thirteen . # She'll be four # Yeah . # Yeah . # He's got er sons of eighteen and nineteen . # Dunno . # Sally's boyfriend . # Does Punch and Ju # You wouldn't like that mother would you ? # You hate it don't you ? # Mother's frightened of Punch and Judy ! # Golliwog . # He's still got it . # still got it . # You bought him that from the garden fete . # Yeah you never very often see a golliwog do you ? # Don't think we're race but # I can't see nothing wrong with golliwogs anyway . # You can't get them . # Oh talking about dolls # I tell you what I saw on the telly this morning . # They showed , that was on the children's thing where they do the toys . # You know how they sort of bombard the telly with toys # and children want them all don't they ? # There was two dolls , a boy and a girl doll and the boy was actually like a boy . # If you know what I mean . # No but it was . # Definitely . # Yeah . # He looked li . # It looked like a little man . # Oh you would have liked the dog what er was a woman outside , they was eating their things outside cos they'd got a dog # Well there's no end of dogs . # There's a white scottie dog . # There was no end of people walking dogs through there . # Well I can't help that if they were there . # There wasn't any . # What today ? # I might go round # And Sainsburys . # Halifax ? # Cor that'll be I'm er we said when that big new Tesco's open # There's great big new Tesco's in Wisbech # soon isn't there ? # That'll be good in there . # I shall be going there I think . # I know ! # Well we was only saying we'd spent eighty something odd # pound no , ninety one # Jonathan . # I'm trying to talk to nanny . # Er ninety one pound in there . # And you couldn't really see much what we'd got , could you Geoff ? # But we had eighty one pounds in stamps . # So that helped out a lot . # That used to be for # Yeah it was forty seven . # Now it's sixty two . # I said this ,thi this next year I'm gonna try and m make no end of jam . # Cos Geoff only eats strawberry well I oughta make it all really cos that'd be far cheaper wouldn't it ? # Not if you keep the top on . # Yeah well you know why . # Cos her house is a bit damp . # Well I'll I'll tell No Geoff has a jar a week you see . # A jar and a half some weeks . # We have one of th we have a la we have a large jar of coffee of that a week , and we have er a jar and a half of jam a week . # He does . # I have two pound of butter a week . # I have I have two # I have two pound of butter a week . # Six loaves of bread . # A big jar of coffee . # Erm jar and a half of jam . # Don't I ? # And that and that's without all the rest of the groceries . # No I don't . # He does . # He does . # Yeah then he has a flask you see . # See and then he has # I d I I drink two or three cups of coffee a morning . # But then I don't drink any more . # I don't drink any all afternoon , coffee and tea a lot . # Well I wouldn't , I wouldn't drink er coffee now , this time of a night cos that gives me a bad head . # Well I don't need nothing to keep # me awake Susan . # I'm awake half the time # I was saying I can virtually survive on four hours sleep , I can , at the moment . # Yeah you can have a couple . # Well Geoffrey seems to need more . # Geoff could go to sleep at seven . # Well you see I go to bed , but I don't always go to sleep . # Sometimes I'm reading till twelve # I read till twelve and then I'm up again at five . # Half past five . # And you said you was feeling a bit better didn't you ? # He messed us about this weekend didn't he ? # He really did . # Oh I know what I was gonna say to you . # Did you get any envelopes ? # Cos you've gotta or are you gonna er sort that out with Susan about that # money for him across the road ? # That's today the # Yeah well that's what I mean . # You , I should give it him quick . # That's what I would think # I did have your pen mother . # What did I do with it ? # What did I do with it ? # No . # Oh she's got it look . # I'm gonna tidy up a bit and # Oh that reminds me , we've got to get a telly licence . # Oh that's done is it ? # Finished ? # Oh good . # Oh good . # Well do you know Ken and Sally haven't have one for six months . # Longer than that ? # Well she's alread they've already been done once . # Yeah . # Hundred and eighty four quid they # She's already been done once . # Now I ain't gonna be done for a telly licence . # It ain't worth it . # Well we see we've been saving the stamps so we had believe it or not # believe it or not we even had fifty pound towards that which is a bloody miracle . # Yeah we do too . # Yeah but you don't dad , do you ? # Well that's right . # Now where did I put your money ? # He ain't getting one for christmas is he ? # That ain't no good to me mother . # No I have erm # We have Tetleys . # You're quiet father . # Do you want me to put this in the bin mum or do you want it ? # Do you want it or # It's in the bin now . # Well you don't have the bloody teabags you burk . # Oh I think I may have to go to the toilet before I go home . # Tell you what # Oh that's better . # What ? # Well how the hell can you do your books in advance ? # she could drop dead over night . # Put your shoes on Jonathan cos we're gonna go in a minute . # Now don't put it near anybody cos that'll cut them . # No . # You mustn't do that # Go go and put your shoes on Jonathan . # Jonathan . # Stay in here with it . # Come and get your shoes on . # Get your shoes on please . # Well we w Geoff nearly had # Well Geoff nearly had a fit about this firm who owes us two hundred pound . # Yeah . # I'm ringing them in the morning . # Well , in the afternoon I think that's better # cos they're never there , seem to be there the # You'd better send the mafia round Geoff . # Susan . # The boss . # The boss had it . # Yeah but the boss had the Belmont as well in the first place because erm # he couldn't have the Sierra cos the Belmont was the only one what was there . # Twice . # Well they had it so long anyway . # Yeah . # The engine out . # And replacing it . # But I said to Geoff I think it was quite legit because a young boy come down with him # who'd just started working for them and he w he didn't look # that type of boy . # He looked he said I've not bo been with them long . # I've only just started so he said er I've just come down to you know . # Well we know who they are ! # Beck and Pollitzer # They've been hiring us for ten years but we , we ain't gonna hire no more if they're changing the bloody engines . # But they've never paid us yet . # A month . # Yeah . # So I'm gonna ring and # I've got two or three people # So we'll have to ring them tomorrow . # Yeah well at the moment we could do with that in the bank couldn't we ? # I like him in that jumper and my friend gave him that . # Isn't that nice ? # Let nanny have a go Jonathan . # Well I think it's about time we was going Geoff if you've # gotta deliver that that # bloke coming back in that car . # Well it's no good taking the tape with him cos he don't talk . # Well turn it off then . # Have you turned it off ? # Oh . # We'll just get # Yeah , most of it . # We got a good session this afternoon # Yeah , third one . # I've turned it over . # So I perhaps could get # Oh # Mother had . # Bugger me she said . # So where do you come from mother ? # Baow . # Cor lovely Susan . # Oh yeah # I could do with some # what other colours do they do ? # Oh yeah . # You'd like to go did you say ? # Perhaps we'll have to do that in the new year # if things change . # No # I could do wi I want some erm p I'd like some peachy colour ones for my bathroom . # You ain't got no peach ones you don't want have you ? # But them ones Bob erm Pam bought me last year was it last year or the year before ? # You can't use them cos every time you use them you get # you get covered in blue dye . # How many tins you got Sue ? # Susan , how many tins you got ? # Oh # Yeah well we're now gonna come . # Yeah will if if your cat won't eat them , don't throw don't erm I'll I'll pay you for them and # Oh . # Ging ? # I tell you something I wish I'd never had that cat round my back door . # Because my cat is my cat is # weeing all over the place . # She's petrified of it . # Well yeah but he still does . # Well if you'd have seen that I mean I and she sleeps in the airing cupboard she's now started to get in there , but she's half out on the landing . # You can't shut the blinking door ! # Well my cat's going most peculiar at the moment . # Well I I often shut erm Fudge in the boiler cupboard . # Well he won't hurt it . # He's definitely gonna be taller than her . # Isn't he cos he only # Lovely . # Well you'll be big enough for big school # Well do you do you know Geoff , Ashley weighs more than Jonathan . # Yeah . # They g they had to be weighed last week and he weighs more than Jonathan . # Fay . # And Terry was nine and a half . # Kilograms . # Are we going then everybody ? # Cos we said to him the other day how much is so and so Jonathan ? # Well he can't work in pounds and ounces # cos they don't work in pounds and ounces today . # We we are wrong by by doing it . # But he , you see he's learnt the right way . # Yeah . # Well they ain't learned nothing at this school yet . # Oh they're doing about homosexuals at ? # Yeah I did tell mum but I can't say in front of Jonathan . # No I do I think that's wise to teach them in schools because they learn the right way . # They learn properly . # And then after that , what happens after that they know the basics . # They know what's going on this that and the other . # Is that off now ? # Is it off now ? # Well you're h # Fine thanks . # Yes I've got a seminar # when I've that poorly cat's into that walking a can you smell cat's wee in here , I'm surprised # you can't Brian ! # She's done nothing but wee in my kitchen and now she's in that corner ! # Yes it's such a disgrace , is that what you're saying ? # Hello mate ! # Did you come back in ? # Is she coming , ya I've just come home . # She's hurt ! # I wish I hadn't I wish I hadn't started feeding it but I can't I can't stop now it's not # Yeah I know . # I can smell it , I've ! # That's just here somewhere , and it's over here . # No . # Well I suppose what's but you see I don't know whether she's doing it that must be her that done it in that corner , cos he ain't been in here ! # But # he he don't erm the cat don't drudge her get # in the way of , but she's just nervous it for some reason . # Yeah # Once they've I'd get a little tray in here overnight , I reckon . # Ah now there's a love . # Isn't , isn't he looking well though Brian ? # Yeah . # But do you know that er # but ever so fussy ! # you know # Ooh they used to play all the # time , terrible ! # Yeah . # Never mind . # Oh are you ? # Carol's having one , did you know ? # Fourteenth . # Not with I always # Yeah well I wasn't really here for my birthday this is my birthday one this is . # Oh God what is it ! # You'd have . # Yeah . # Yeah # we go what we do down there this year . # Did she mention that ? # I'll be there next year . # I know I've just # I said I'd make . # he was tearing a # bit off # Well I said # I said well perhaps Ell could go up then , cos I'm later ain't I ? # Well how we gonna get that bit down then ? # Oh wha wow ! # Oh well that ain't gonna help , you don't want ! # What ? # Yeah . # Well why don't you get one of tho for Sunday # then ? # Yeah . # What about oh it was out there . # Where is that ladder ? # Well I keep telling you to move that away from the house I said talking about your rising crime , you're giving them a ladder to use as well ! # Your cos we put it in the paddock didn't we ? # Where ? # Well there's isn't gone then ! # It's in # the garage . # Well . # I tell you what we ought to do , I keep saying to Geoff , if we locked the garage door , you know the big garage lock , they can't get out can they ? # Yeah but you can lock up can't you ? # Oh I was gonna say , if you could stop them from undoing that door , they wouldn't never get it out of there would they ? # Yeah that's a good idea put a on it and then they'll go # yes but # No . # Well after you just put it # Wonder why everybody's going that way , ? # then ? # Well you # You should be alright , cos you got the rottweiler next door . # Yeah well # we're doing it I'm # doing it . # You can say # whatever you like . # Tha that is on . # Yeah but # say what you like otherwise you # gotta do it . # No you can't be forty one . # Yeah . # No # Brian ,Bri he was i # he he'd a a harmless little man . # twenty five # Yeah . # Of course they are # Well that man's , there is a tiny little ma , well he stopped me going out with Dorothy . # Whatever for ? # Yeah . # Yeah he did , yeah . # Come on ! # Well they must be . # Speak . # If he knew you # You'll be different on there to what we are . # Spencers for doing it . # Yeah . # Well # That bloody thing's always barking . # Queue up Bartons all flipping day when she's in there . # My God if she's got if she's got that thing on a door , I should the ! # Oh yes # I know , he said I daren't go near that ! # Well he went up right to the gate # he said , cos he's coming back , didn't he ? # Oh he looked ever so frightened ! # Yes but this was a little old man ! # Well sh she practi she's that worried anyway cos erm I said to him well I won't do anything until I've spoken to Geoff , I'll go out # and speak to Geoff there , I thought well I'll go and make sure # I was quite convinced it was quite alright . # And er he comes home at half past three and he then sort of told us what we'd got to do in it . # Well if you'd have looked him Brian you could of told what sort of # type of person he was , he was something like Geoff's dad . # What have they got in there , what's so valuable ? # Bet she wanna , she ought to be well insured . # Oh yeah I shall , I don't want that ! # Ooh you want to tell her when he goes when he leaves me in here with this door unlocked ! # Geoff does , four o'clock in the morning ! # He never locks the door properly and anybody could get in and # kill me in my bed ! # I keep telling him , I said lock it up and post the key through # the letter box , he said what I've gotta come back # Oh it ri # Joe ! # Jonathan ! # Don't you forget about bath time ! # You don't want your shin pads do you ? # Well look how filthy they are ! # Well I wouldn't ta I'll scrub them up tonight if I get a chance . # Ashley never scrubbed them very well did he ? # They're bloody filthy ! # What ? # Well he don't borrow them no more then ! # You shouldn't let Christopher he # He can't afford to look after them a bit better . # Is that money alright like that Jonathan ? # That's your dinner money . # But bring the change home ! # Not them other little things cos they know you've got them at the school . # Yeah you don't need to take them as well do you ? # No I don't want to ! # Them football boots stink ! # Oh hang on a mo # Where's your dinner money gonna go ? # And mummy ain't got an envelope so that'll have to # do won't it . # Great that's that done . # Coat ? # Try and keep your trousers clean Jonathan ! # If you're playing football hold them up ! # Not just round on the floor you know will you please ? # Well you're going a bit early aren't you ? # Oh alright . # Bob will ? # Why not ? # Well at least if it's wet and dull you've got # You can if you're not gonna use it . # Well perhaps his mum don't want you borrowing his brother's . # bedroom . # Yeah . # You ought to have pay for it Jonathan , I'm gonna wind it up again ! # You know I don't know why you don't have or ! # I bet it does . # . # Yeah , do you like that ? # Oh , remember they told me , alright ? # Ian ! # Hello ! # Well I mean christmas presents . # Why ? # I don't care . # I didn't realize that was the time . # What ? # I thought well I'll just # . # I love these . # I think # Oh ! # Ooh this is pretty , who done that ? # Cor ! # So that'll be number six as well # can't flatten the ribbons . # Did that last year . # Course I will . # Where do you get all your bits from ? # That's lovely . # Yeah I think if you put them in polythene bags and staple # them up . # Ooh I rang the the club # yep , we won't be getting anything , we're eighty pound behind . # Anybody think that was a fortune wouldn't they ? # What altogether aye ? # Nothing at all coming ? # June's came as well . # Yeah so they perha they perhaps still come . # But they did say four to five weeks on the coat didn't they ? # And two two to four on your thing so # they could still come you know so # Yeah . # Yeah . # Why ? # Well why can't she go out for christmas dinner ? # You told me she was having done . # Yeah . # Yeah . # So we what is ha what is she doing ? # So she's not coming ? # Yeah . # Yeah . # Don't have a go at me ! # What ? # Whatever does she need a big kitchen for ? # Her and that little boy ? # It's hers if he comes round . # Then won't she have the other girl # Well I can't what , am I gonna go up the hospital then with her ! # Yeah . # So , are you gonna go out now then ? # He wants to because he doesn't want to go anyway . # Just us and the as I call them . # Well that ain't gonna be so good though , is it ? # So you've gotta co you've gotta cancel that then , cos she might have to pay . # Yeah but you ought to let them know . # Or whoever is . # Well I should leave it till the weekend things could change . # Whatever's the matter with the girl ? # So there's Julie , Ian and James aren't gonna go to the meal at all ? # So # Well why can't if John and Jim ain't gonna go Marie's not gonna go , why can't Cheryl still go and then # So she's gonna have a he heavy work # again ? # But that's got nothing to do with it ! # Well I # That's mucked your plans up as well innit ? # Cos you # all enjoy going together . # I'll tell you something , why don't you go and invite Carole and Brian ? # Well I would , I should go up there and have a word with Carole and Brian cos they sit on their own all christmas virtually ! # They do well last year they had egg and chips ! # They # they tried to go out for a meal , I don't know whether it was christmas day or boxing day down in and they couldn't get n in nowhere , I said well you wouldn't on a boxing day ! # Yeah . # So is Gill going with you ? # Oh no ! # Well a yeah it's nice for Gill really cos he don't enjoy it . # Oh well ! # But then you can't in # Yeah well then that's gonna be awkward really if you invite Carole and Brian and then just dump them off ain't it ? # Do you see what I'm # Oh what a # Oh what a shame ! # Yeah but they ma they make # You don't know when Nick's well her mother don't come christmas ! # No ! # What # Oh they have to bring # Yeah and then if I can't # bloody go , yeah that's right . # Well that's embarrassing for you to do that though won't it ? # Well I I know where I am so I ain't gotta worry but boxing day we're going to well I was going to mum's I'll come up and see you boxing day though . # Like I normally do . # Well we're going to mum's but Geoff said well I I hate them cos Bobby and Pam are going I think this year he said well if I get fed up doing that evening he said I'll come home early . # So I said oh fair enough , I don't mind . # That's entirely up to him what we do but I shall be up for dinner you know and sort of see you and then if Geoff wants to leave early , we will . # Yeah . # yeah # Oh that's no good is it ? # But # but you can go straight for the meal , straight round hers . # and then is she coming back to you at all ? # We will they ? # Yeah well even if they came sort of late afternoon , turn up about fiveish and had a a bit of tea and then spent the evening with you that won't be too bad would it ? # Well that's ridiculous ! # What's the matter with it ? # Well what's does he he just shows her how to # Well innit ridiculous ! # I better go in a minute . # Well you see children need routine really , you need to get into a routine , when you get into that # Well he wouldn't be would he ? # Yeah and that # Well that's gonna wear her , that's gonna make her ill . # Well what # But it's silly to let a baby rule your life ain't it ? # I mean or anyway , it isn't her baby is it ? # I know it's her grandson but # Well she had erm Sam one night didn't she ? # Oh I bet she did , I bet she didn't treat him like that ! # Did she really ! # Good heavens ! # Well if I'd have known , I'd have had it ! # No but you don't you don't do that sort of thing . # No # Well then that's her fault isn't it ? # What can you do about that ? # Well I think really if he's if he's # gotta say to her and now you gotta stand on your own two feet everything we do you keep changing so # Well look # No . # Well they do get like that # at that age don't they ? # No . # Well that's a disappointment for you Val isn't it when you get ? # The whole thing ! # Because let's face it Val she is a type of person , you get her in a party or anywhere you know you're gonna enjoy yourself . # I know she thinks says things you know she embarrasses me at times # but I know you know if she's there you're gonna have a good time . # You know erm and I if she if she goes to emba cos I think she does it for the purpose really to people # she tries to embarrass # them you know # I try to ignore her , if I can wha # Yeah when she tries to d # Like last time at the party well I just ignored her , I just looked the other way well Caroline she well # No way ! # Ooh ! # Oh no ! # Proud ? # That's it , I'll be going on holiday there . # He did tell me they were going . # He's been to France . # My God ! # That's a nice area and it's a house # that's just the area he's in . # I said mine are getting it three times ! # Cor I wouldn't have been proud ! # You mustn't walk away you know cos I shan't be ab you're supposed to be on my tape ! # Well it don't matter what we talk about , we can talk about something naughty if you like ! # No Jean , you ain't gotta say who you are nothing like that bye ! # Have a nice day . # Well that's a good job it went on # cos ahead . # Yeah , oh yeah oh it's alright for some innit ! # Well ! # Yeah , that's right . # Whatever's all them people for to , ooh ! # Why did they keep coming ? # Ah ho ! # Well now how did it get in # Well honestly it's terrible isn't it ? # They get worse don't they ! # I'll go straight to my and I do with some coffee . # Makes you feel a bit # downcast really don't it ? # You're not sort of good in it ooh look at washing blowing Sue ! # Well I got some sheets and that . # Have you ? # Did you really ? # Well I've got # I might bring my take my cotton things in before I go peach . # Yeah and then that by the time I get back about fourish # they're damp ! # Do you know I could go out on mine , couldn't you ? # So's mine . # See they look so tidy but they oh I don't know how they keep them like it ! # Nor do I ! # Do they ? # Did Jenny and have dinner with them all ? # Ooh crumbs ! # I bet ! # Yeah well I don't take a lot a notice of Dorothy on that score because she go she says , I don't know why I do it ! # But she always told me # Yeah . # That lady's gotta big job doing that ! # Yeah . # Yeah . # I bet than mine # some some of mine are getting old and you can't get them clean . # They look a bit well grey looking don't they ? # No . # I'd cos er sometimes my tea cloths they've still got little stains on them . # They're clean but they're # Hello . # You can't # get the stains out # And I bet it never come out . # Yeah . # Yeah . # Yeah I find that oh Val they've got some ha Christmas trimmings up . # Jonathan wanted us to put ours up the weekend and I thought well # Well I don't really put I suppo I usually put them up before birthday . # Ooh that's Geoff's mummy's birthday this week . # Well I got Geoff's mum's and Susan's # Then Ron's who else , someone else is in December I can't think who it is . # ? # What a horrible day to have a birthday ! # Oh not him ! # Yeah # Well did you ? # Did you know you was gonna have him on the twenty # fifth ? # Oh so you had him early # then ! # Oh you had him quite early didn't you ? # They never know properly anyway . # I'm sure no one 's caught her . # Oh that cabinet in there Sue look ! # also don't it ? # Oh was she alright ? # Yes don't take a lot # Yeah . # Yeah . # Yeah . # Yeah . # No that's good , and yet prob yeah probably with his friends going # you know # She'll do that for a long time , I bet . # Yeah . # Yeah # Yeah it hits you like a ton of bricks # I should think . # Yeah it's not very nice is it ? # It's awful ! # She wants to give herself # Well some people # you know ,bi would rather be flowing about and you know ? # But if she feels like she wants extra time I think she ought to allow herself extra time # don't she ? # Well it's a big thing losing your son at that age isn't it ? # Was he ? # Yes . # Yeah . # Trudy . # Mrs # Yeah . # Why what's the matter with her ? # I heard she was in hospital . # Oh my God ! # What's she got cancer or something ? # Oh my God ! # Oh how terrible ! # Yeah cos she's a nice person . # Yeah . # Yeah cos she used to teach here in the school # a little while didn't # she ? # Oh ! # Yeah oh dear ! # Makes you wonder don't it ? # Ooh I thought he was a flipping turnover that ! # Who did ? # Did you have a good at school ? # What've you done ? # Did you have a lot to finish off ? # What guards ? # Oh ! # Oh yeah . # Oh you like doing them don't you ? # Is maths your favourite subject ? # You like art as well . # What is your worst thing ? # Yeah but your handwriting's a lot better . # How's James getting on now ? # Is he getting on better ? # Oh dear . # Still the same is he ? # You play with John a bit more now don't you ? # Dunno . # Oh dear ! # Well don't be horrible ! # Bet he read it out , I know Is it ? # Oh ! # Yeah , go on then . # Oh oh ! # Yeah ? # Ah ah . # What is it at home then ? # Oh yeah ? # Is that an expensive one ? # Oh someone might be able to buy you that for Christmas . # What's that ? # What's that ? # Well where are they ? # Erm that's upstairs . # What you mean , where are they ? # Yeah well I put it upstairs . # In your bedroom . # I don't know where I put it actually , but it is in there . # Well go on then , what else you gotta tell me ? # What do you do in the afternoon ? # Who got that ? # Is he going ? # Why ? # Well why ain't you then ? # Why don't you try harder then ? # Of what ? # And what a story or something ? # How many did you do then ? # Yeah I know , so has Pete , did you hear him ? # Almost like he's dying ! # have their tonight . # No . # I know . # in your bedroom . # Whatever would he do on there ? # Oh he didn't again ! # No ! # Oh how disgusting ! # What about # Ah how that's horrible ! # He's what ? # I haven't seen it Jonathan . # No . # No thank you , I don't want to . # Is it ? # Maybe his dad doesn't know that does that . # They ain't you wanna be careful when you're walking down that park it's # all over the . # Makes mummy feel sick . # What ever's that # Yeah . # Yeah . # What ? # What the big house right down there . # Yeah . # Yeah . # What do you mean about ? # Well what does it say on this file then , about the people ? # Well why ? # Oh God ! # Oh yeah , what is Julian's one ? # He reckons he's gonna sell his . # What ? # Who does ? # He won't be getting that . # He won't Jonathan . # Cos his dad said so . # I thought you was gonna play football today . # I got all your things ready and then you didn't play ! # Who said that ? # What does he want you to play with him ? # Well no but you both yeah but you wanna play football if you want to Jonathan don't you . # You know play football on the # Why don't go today ? # If you wanna play it , you play it , you know don't let Matthew put you off . # When's the next match ? # Well you're obviously are not quite good enough , are you ? # And he's a naughty boy as well ! # Is he naughty in class ? # Is he in your class ? # Is he ? # Is he ? # When's his birthday then ? # Oh he isn't much younger than you then really is he ? # oi ! # She was ! # Jonathan ! # Take her out please will you ! # Pick her # up and take yourself out . # That door make sure ! # I'm not doing that again ! # Come on I know . # Okay . # Won't be long . # Smack in the ear hole ! # I thought you wanted that headphone set ? # Well you can't have everything # anything in other words ? # Well why don't you just say you don't mind any of them ? # Well I tell you something you don't wanna spend all your Christmas money do you ? # You know what you wanna do with it ? # Put it away and then # er # for your holiday , yeah . # And then you'll want some for the holiday , when we go just to Cromer won't you ? # Meaple # Why can't you wait ? # You'll have to . # I wish these chips would get done cos everything else is cooked . # Oh . # Lasagne . # What you on about ? # No ! # That's cos I've I've filled that's all . # Whichever one you like . # You are greedy sometimes Jonathan ! # I don't know what time to expect dad tonight . # You know you gotta go Grandma on Saturday ? # No you don't sound like that cos she was nearly like and Grandma . # Not like this # Well you can't not at Grandma's can you ? # Well no Grandma's gonna have you all day . # Or I might be home a lot earlier than you think . # What ? # Well I don't think so # I don't know I shall have to see . # Something with style ? # You don't want a lot do you Jonathan ! # No I know you don't realise I don't think how much # What ? # What ? # Where'd he get them from ? # He told me at Westgate . # Jonathan , don't talk like that , it's not very nice ! # Can you just get out the way please ! # Well no ! # It's dad's place . # Well yeah I suppose you can , and dad can sit there . # Well it , yeah but will you put on on the end of that ta at right at the end there , so they're out the way . # Dinner won't be long now , I just can't get them back in . # Erm Sarah is . # Daniel ? # Who is it ? # How old is he then ? # Is he really ? # Oh who's been telling you all this ? # Do you like Darren ? # Er , oh yeah ! # Who ? # Yeah I'm gonna meet you up there . # So what do you say ? # Yeah well what I'm gonna do , I'm gonna meet you at the village hall . # They'll be other people coming won't there ? # Fay will I should think . # Oh no ! # No she's going tomorrow isn't she ? # I'm not going at all . # Not this time . # Mr asked me to come Wednesday when you went . # Who's # is in your group then ? # Yeah . # Ooh my goodness me ! # Can I just # move the chairs round ? # Elizabeth any of your own mates ? # Yeah . # So how many people are in your group ? # Well you isn't said seven ! # What about James or someone like that ? # Who are you actually with though ? # What ? # Who ? # Oh you like being with her don't you ? # you're gonna filthy ! # I don't , cos he's naughty at John's . # The sausages are done , I'd better turn that oven off . # Yeah # Oh John's alright . # Alright Jonathan ! # Don't be silly Jonathan ! # Well perhaps he is a little bit weird but don't be silly ! # Well they've just come out of the chip pan # I should they are hot ! # Why and you leave it in the tub . # No it's not burnt ! # That's the top bit , that always goes like that . # Look , it's lovely ! # You don't want to take yours out . # Have you ? # Yeah . # hasn't got to do has he ? # has . # Do you like the ? # Do you want a chip ? # How many do you want ? # We'll leave the rest for dad . # Before I forget I'll put them in the microwave . # What's hot ? # Urgh ! # You ain't putting tomato sauce on lasagne surely ? # Don't be silly ! # You are Jonathan , sometimes . # That's enough ! # Don't keep saying that ! # Yeah it's not very nice ! # Alright . # Is it nice ? # It's not six o'clock ! # Already ? # it is . # This is the what mummy usually has when I go out with the meal at work . # Mm . # Yeah . # No . # Cos dad'll be working I think and Miss Mrs isn't going and Mrs can't go , I might as well go . # Erm I think it's a Wednesday night . # Can't can't can I ? # Cos I don't usually have a car , somebody usually takes me . # And anyway you've gotta get up for school in the morning . # About seven . # I'd rather go out with dad anyway . # I dunno . # What ? # Prawn cocktail Jonathan ! # Why do you say prawn and ? # Prawn cocktail ! # Oh whitebait ? # You didn't did you ? # Or the # Oh . # Do they all talk at school like that ? # Mean mushroom ! # Aunt Maggie videoing you the re-match ? # Did he say he'd come round here on Sunday ? # Did he say he'd come round ? # have a look . # He don't normally play with him do he ? # Oh . # And what did you say while all this was going on ? # Oh . # Was he ? # What does he do now then ? # Oh well he wouldn't hurt you . # Is he really ? # Well Matthew don't take after him . # Cos he isn't no taller than you . # Oh . # Brown . # Brown . # Blue . # Yes . # Yeah . # Well greeny tinge I suppose , yeah . # If two people have got blue eyes the mother and father the children always have blue eyes I think If the mother's got brown and the father's got brown they don't have a blue eyed child . # No . # What's that noise Jonathan ? # Oh makes a funny noise don't it ? # Didn't eat all your dinner today ? # I thought you'd have liked that cheese and egg pie ? # Yeah you can't always eat pizzas Jonathan ! # Oh . # Yeah Who's going with Mr ? # I said who's going with Mr ? # friends though isn't there ? # That's very nice Jonathan . # Couldn't eat a bit more than that . # Mm . # Here's Daddy . # We couldn't wait no longer ! # Ah bread ! # Don't worry you'll . # Mm I've just had it . # Alright ? # Yeah . # Well yeah you know go Mondays . # Monday afternoons . # Well I had to come all the way back didn't I . # Because I don't like his van . # I couldn't , you can't really see on it . # I couldn't see , I ain't got my glasses on me . # Yeah but I've gotta make so I had to come all the way home ! # Well I've made appointment for Wednesday so bloody well keep that ! # You need to change them batteries , the batteries isn't very good at all ! # No it can't be cos we've only just just turned that one over ! # We did . # Is it ? # Oh good ! # I taped I want you to check it for me , I taped me and Sue walking home cos I have to do around the school you see . # So I can do it walking home can't I ? # And I've had it on the . # He's on holiday for three days . # I think he's getting his . # John ? # Yeah well Pam says he's got three days holiday . # I didn't hear a word you said . # What ? # And he wonders why he's got a # Something wrong with his he's likely to . # Still with the money he saved he's got enough . # Well that's quite some money , fifty pounds worth of # Well he can put bought as much as we're gonna buy you can drink yourself silly for thirty one . # No I thinks that sounds silly . # What ? # That's hot ! # Pete's gone down to the shop and got yourself a bottle whisky . # Well he's got a cold , a very bad cold . # Gotta bring him up to scratch . # He has really got a bad cold . # Sounds awful ! # No he wasn't coughing . # Is that enough ? # Is that alright ? # Right , done it ! # you don't want here are . # Oh alright , give it to them . # No don't wipe your dirty one ! # I'll get a clean one Just turn that water off for us Jonathan ? # Don't mess about with that ! # The boiler cupboard . # Oh wait , let's see what you gotta tell me today . # Yeah well I couldn't so I had to come over and and buy them a flipping new one ! # Ooh I number again , I'll take it out in a minute . # And er she said well , I said I'm ever so sorry but she's anyway so I thought oh God ! # That's a step in the right direction . # I rang # You can't , you don't go through to that office at I go further on # but they are amalgam is it # amalgamating , with another firm so the paper work probably has got lost So I # she said she was gonna ring me back , but you see I haven't been here this afternoon so I'll perhaps ring again tomorrow . # Well I couldn't do nothing about it really , she said well that'll be sorted out in she said I'll treat it , we're now sorting it out today what we're doing . # So I said well I hope it's not gonna be too long I said cos we're not a a very big firm and I said , you know , we want the money ! # She said well I should imagine that's what's happened the paper work here has got muddled up with the other . # So she said I'll do I'll sort it out straight away for you well I had a phone call at # eight o'clock this morning , who the hell that was from , I don't know , I was out the washing line I come flying in but I never got it , and nobody's rung . # Not unless I get a few phone calls from been here today . # But you must get that portable done cos then that reaches over there I can # I bet it do I bet it will ! # Yeah well that'll be ever so handy , well you can try it can't you ? # Yeah . # Yeah don't go very well the other way we said , didn't we ? # I dunno why . # Well # too bad . # You must get it sorted out though , after Christmas # there isn't much point now but # Well you see He'll # He'll be breaking up the twentieth and how long you on holiday , fortnight ? # I thought you had a long Christmas break ? # Yes you do , you break up on the twentieth ! # Christmas Day , yeah precisely ! # Christmas Day is the twenty fifth ! # Do you want a cup of coffee Geoff ? # Who said that . # I'm just going in here # to have this , # Jonathan . # Tell your dad what time we got up . # This morning . # That was last nights . # That's it . # Yeah well I've I've just done that . # So I just put you on it . # Well you are on it , you twit ! # See I got Sue on it as well . # Erm , what else can I put there ? # We was at home # having tea # then what can I put ? # Yeah but that that is the Sunday thing that's how I get muddled up with the date , but that's on the same tape you see ? # Oh I'll put that Yeah go on what was you gonna say ? # Frozen . # Yeah . # Urgh how disgusting ! # Oh that's absolutely disgusting ! # Cor I couldn't le urgh ! # Oh and we eat a lot of baked beans # I hope he don't work there still urgh ! # What what time shall I put on there ? # On here oh I'll put about # yeah cos me and Jonathan started talking on it before . # You know ? # Mm . # I ain't made too many mistakes oh I've put them marathon . # Nothing exciting happening , there's them poisoned dwarf . # Why's that ? # I bet he didn't like that ? # Was Bleep in ? # Why ? # Oh , what is Val's accent ? # is it ? # Yeah . # Well I don't know well that'll be on there if they want to know anyway now , you've just said it . # Well what's the council man got to do with that ? # Well carpets ain't got nothing to do with it surely ? # Oh . # I thought he would have to tell them got his carpets down . # Well he's got a lot to do then . # Cor ! # How's how's the thing between Blue and # Good heavens ! # Oh I think she's the trouble maker there myself . # I think that's what started it all off I think she's running off . # Oh whatever you done ? # Yeah . # Oh . # What you mean ? # Yeah . # I didn't know Julia hadn't been in for a long while . # She'd erm was erm getting a pie out the oven and cos some of the juice went on the floor , she wiped it up thinking she'd wiped it up properly and she didn't , she slipped , she's broken a couple of bones in her foot . # She hasn't been there for about a month . # I suppose she must have her foot in plaster . # Well I see him walking about the other day ! # Oh . # Has he ? # Well I seen her at even the other day . # I think it might have been Saturday possibly . # Well he goes up to do his shopping don't he , in town # and walk up . # What does he do for Christmas Geoff ? # Cos he's got a son away hasn't he ? # Perhaps goes there ? # Does he ? # That must be a lonely old life for him living there all on his own . # What happened to his mum ? . # His wife . # Oh I don't know ! # I thought she was dead or something ! # Oh I dunno . # Married someone else . # Oh ! # Perhaps it was her . # Oh crumbs ! # And thi and this # They didn't ! # Yeah cos he's a nice little man ain't he ? # Yeah ever so harmless little fellah . # What about what Brian said last night ? # About , cos that man was sitting outside May . # He weren't sitting outside her house at all , he was sitting up here ! # Oh well he might of done , yeah . # They're paranoid for people breaking # in arn't they . # I was telling Sue about it , oh my God she said ! # She said well they didn't look the type , I was going well now # quite honestly he didn't ! # I said and he's quite and inoffe i inoffensive little man he was a nice little man . # Well yeah , but he was a nice little man . # He knew what he was talking about . # No , none at all . # Ooh I rang the club and sorted that out , done # that . # So she said well don't don't put them down again I'm doing it by the computer . # So I said well do I get the things now ? # So she said well no cos she said you're you're in the re in arrears a bit . # Ooh I said , oh have I ? # It ain't a lot ! # So she said I'll do it on the computer and and I'll let you know so we're eighty pound behind well course we never sent one month at all ! # No ! # So we got behind So I said well we'll tr I'll try and get caught up sort of , in the new year you know , get them a bit . # Actually I think I'm gonna finish that catalogue anyway I'm just # Grattan . # And just have the other one cos they're such a peculiar funny firm they are ! # So I explained to them , I said well that's cos you changed over and I sort of never put it across through oh she said well don't worry I've done it now , she said you haven't got anything to worry about now , I said well it did bother me a bit to think that I didn't think you had my payment ! # Oh yes she said , we've had it I thought well why send me letters ,then ! # Well that's what she said , that's a standard letter . # Well you get some little old dear what runs the # catalogue to # get a little bit of pocket money or that's the only way she can get anything ! # Oh they're out in that car again out there . # Damn ! # They're up to the roof aren't they ? # What's # I didn't think Sarah didn't go to the ol lo oh had oh I wouldn't of thought that was a pair , # Well Val was telling me Caroline got the kids all in a row and said something about erm you know , more or less to say well I want to leave your father she said # what do you think about it Sam ? # And he just put his head down . # And what do you think about it Erica ? # And she burst into tears ! # And what do you think about it erm what did I say the other one's name was ? # Which one did I say ? # That'll be Ben the oldest . # No it was Sam . # Yeah well anyway the other one # he said well I think that's the best you can do father , he said we've had enough hassle for you for all these years ! # So she said quite right , she said he's done nothing but bully you lot ever since you've been children ! # So she said and I felt very proud of my son , ah I said I wouldn't want a son of mine who said that to his father ! # I wouldn't of wanted it . # Yeah but all said and done Geoff , they are his fa , he is their father . # He you know what a big head he is . # Well she said he he's done nothing but bully them . # Well you heard what he said he wants his children to have a good education and he pushes them all the time , they've gotta if they do anything # they've gotta be brilliant at it But # you see some children ain't got it in them and you know # but you heard what Ashley said about swimming . # Well , to me if a child has got a by all means encourage along but you shouldn't push them into anything cos later on in life they get a bloody complex about everything you know if they # if they've got a job or something they're frightened they're not gonna do well and # Well I do it all look at it's the way you say it . # Well yeah but I wouldn't # Well would you like your son to say I think # Well no . # But he's always been like that with them kids you know yourself if they do anything it's gotta be done # They've all gone off to Fiji . # The parents , he said he was going didn't he ? # So she said , Val said I thought good for you mate , you didn't get pushed out he's gone they're all gone till the new year innit ? # Well I wouldn't of wanted to go with them myself . # I wouldn't of thought so I would of sa I would of said well if I bloody ju good enough for living with I bleeding come on a I don't think she'd want him on holiday with her anyway and her sister said is she hadn't got enough money , she'd pay for it . # That's right that's what Val told me . # What ? # Who hasn't her sister ? # No she just says he's a bloody big head ! # Well yeah . # But I think he's quite harmless really Geoff I don't think he # means any harm , that's his way . # Well he's always been pleasant to me you gotta # Well I find her boring . # I find her very boring although she's a very kind person . # I'm surprised you know , she isn't stuck for them children mo any more if he'd been # like this that's it . # Well she hates him ! # She literally hates him ! # Well I think that's awful I do . # Well she might as well get rid of him now , I suppose while she's young enough to find perhaps find # somebody else . # Well whatev whatever's all this big house in aid of then ? # I bet they're gonna build it and sell it ! # Well yeah , I would've thought so because le # Well let's face it erm he's got a , a half a half a right to it . # He's worked hard , he's worked he ain't he does work , when he works . # Well I dunno . # And he does it now does he ? # You never see that erm do you ? # Well yeah cos when you think like that if they do pack up he's got no no nothing . # Well not unless they they don't sell that house well look at poor old Dick ! # Yeah but he's still gotta have a home to live in Geoff ! # Well that's like er # but then they've got er er said they they asked if they could rent his house off him until they got themselves sorted out . # No bloody way he said ! # I thought to myself well yo if Laura had a house and then thought Pete was in that in that position , I'd of helped him . # Yeah well they've had they've had a big today . # . # Well I thought she said I ain't gotta then have they ? # A hundred pou thous thousand in debt they had two lo two bloody great Morgan cars ! # Well I reckon that's her either his mother or her mother . # Cos when I was coming home from Pete's a bloke stopped me er whatever's that noise ? # A bloke stopped and he said er can you tell me where is ? # I said well you're in the oh he said I'll tell you what I want , a little black and white house I said it's just there look I said nearly you're nearly on top ! # He got a few yards down , he said so I said well have yo you haven't come round to view the house today have you ? # Oh no he said , I said because they got a funeral on , he said that's what we've coming for , we're coming to pick granddad up . # Well I thought well I didn't want people going round there # Well that was a waste of their time if they'd have gone round there to view them , weren't it ? # So that was not having a lot of flipping luck is she ? # But they haven't put them out their home . # Alright , but I think they've gotta re-house them first haven't they ? # Well yeah they just shove you out on the street , they gotta especially if you got children they gotta re-house you . # But I dunno whatever's whatever's this bloody world coming to ? # Well you never guess what she said today ? # Well I wa she said I'm gonna start up drinking June I said you're not ! # She said I bloody well am ! # She said you can up and have one with me if you like sometimes , I said alright then . # She said well he's got his fags , she said I'm gonna start drinking ! # I said well be warned Val ! # She said I know when to stop , I thought yeah but # Yeah but # that # Jonathan what are you doing ? # Ooh and there's ooh something else happened as well ! # She erm # Sha Sharon's not going out with them now for Christmas . # Cos Marie's going in hospital having her operation . # She said and I'm not leaving her to you see ! # But Val said them children them children have they manipulate her . # I thought well manipulates you Val . # So she said erm I'll bloody told her straight she said ! # But she said there's Geoff worried sick about that old girl # because he's said well she's go she's they got her this little place , didn't they ? # Sorted it all out for her and carp it was all carpeted everything # now she's gone and moved down in West . # But he Val said it was that flipping rough # and the house is like a tip ! # And she said Geoff kept saying to her oh I wouldn't move from where you are , you know you got your place lovely i if you the reason she moved was cos she wanted Tony to get the breakfast round What was said that's what Val said . # So she said the 's go out with them don't they ? # What ? # What does ? # Well erm # I didn't think Ken liked the woman . # Well Ken don't like the woman anyway , does he ? # Well I certainly wouldn't sit down at Christmas dinner with them that's why # they're going . # And er Mervy . # And that's all now so Val said she said I said to Cheryl now don't you go and take Mervy away cos me and Ken certainly aren't gonna go and sit sit with erm the 's all dinner time so she said what they're gonna do , they're going out for the meal and everything and then they're Ken are gonna go to Cheryl's for the rest of the day So I said so that's upset your plans then Val she said isn't it just ! # She said I've been really looking forward to it June . # Have a break looked like she gonna cry any second ! # She said # Do you know me and Ted have been married thirty year no not thirty , they've been going out together thirty years # then she said do you know these last six months we do nothing but argue she said we've never argued so much ! # And she said oh I think it's only the pressure . # I said well me and Geoff argue more , I said we never used to cos we never argued a lot did we ? # Well we have done I felt sorry cos I hadn't really when she phoned me up over there I was up I thought oh my God ! # Cos I'm a bit worried we gotta get things sorted out so I rang I said I didn't to get onto you , she said no I know how they feel she said her granddad always do things like that . # You know break appointments I said well that only worries # well I said I suppose Geoff couldn't get away . # I said that that worried m that really sort of worried me so I rung her back anyway , she's alright . # But you must go Wednesday Geoff ! # And she been # Yeah . # So you could of gone to that appointment tonight ? # Yeah well you can't go there not washed and changed . # But you got an appointment fo you could of had one for tomorrow but I thought Wednesday is a better day I thought . # Why erm why do the ministry keep coming down there then ? # Do they turn up there ? # I'm surprised they warn them that they're coming . # Not hygiene sort of thing ? # Mhm . # It's gotta go on a special one ? # I'm surprised they use wood . # Yeah I suppose they would , yeah . # Do they ? # Bloody hell ! # Well then that is , that's gotta be sorted out because if you # had a fire there , somebody wouldn't get out properly ! # What way do you go to your nearest exit then ? # Yeah well what about if the fire was down that end ? # How would you get out ? # Yeah well what about if the fire's between the box room and this exit ? # Where are you going ? # What ab oi ! # Don't ask then ! # I mean I won't even talk to myself am I ? # I didn't tell your mum that I'd got it on you see she said now all that I've been saying ! # So I said well no , no they won't take no notice of that , I said anyone that's been # I said they ain't gonna say ooh that's Val on there , I said the # What is it ? # In Cambridge got something to do with , what was that he said ? # Well anyway something about University you know all these studies they do . # Geoff and Joan thought erm someone was trying to rob us along here ! # Poor little man ! # I said I don't know what hollering for , he's got a bloody # rottweiller there ! # Oh yeah . # But how pathetic ! # yeah # Well I can never understand him . # If we ought to had him mate they'd have thought he'd come from # another planet ! # No I must admit I can't . # And did you get it right ? # Yeah # She got those to # I like her hair tha that colour do you Geoff ? # No ! # No . # Well that's cos it's always been so light # isn't it ? # Ah I like it I knew there was something # different to me have a at least when you have it down Sarah # Yeah . # Oh yeah # isn't you really ? # Yeah I think you do feel tidy if your hair's off your face . # Yeah . # Yeah . # Yeah . # Oh yeah ! # I wonder where you find one of them from ? # Well they must do them Sarah , mustn't they ? # Mm where's a ? # Yeah . # And or perhaps a real sort of top hairdresser , they might have them they sometimes have bits and # pieces don't they ? # Well that used to be all the rage once , didn't it ? # Oh yeah ! # O yeah # No . # You're not ! # You want a change ? # How # was you thinking of having it cut ? # What short short ? # No so short # short hair would suit you cos you haven't got it all over your face have you ? # Yeah . # Well I think if that was me I'd have that done now in case you don't like it by the time you you get married and that could be growing again . # Oh # you'd have it cut after ? # Oh . # Yeah . # Yeah I do do you know I don't like to see brides with their hair down if you've got long hair i # but I don't think sometimes I think well if it looks nice but some of them brides on there that just hangs don't it ? # Oh yeah ! # Oh yeah ! # Yeah . # Oh yeah ! # Oh that's sounds nice ! # Yeah . # Yeah . # Well you'll have to have it done a couple of times # sort of try two or three styles then sort of how well you gotta think about your headdress and that first , haven't you ? # What you're gonna have and then pu guide your hairstyle to go with it we or # or your wearing wha # well , yeah . # What you be doing in the new year Sarah ? # Mm . # Yeah . # Yeah but you aren't # you haven't got a white skin Sarah have you ? # You've got a sort of a bit of an olivy skin haven't you ? # Yeah so you will have time to # get a # tan won't you ? # You'll have time to do that . # No . # You're right yeah . # Yeah . # Will you have your bridesmaids dresses made ? # Had you thought about your bridesmaids yet ? # Oh are you ! # Yeah . # What ? # Oh . # So you want another little one ? # Are you having any page boys ? # Well didn't you just have # Why don't you have the # with the page boy ? # Instead of having another bridesmaid , have a page boy and so the two little ones go up together page boy # and erm bridesmaid and then have your bridesmaids behind . # I think that'd look nice # a little boy and a little girl together . # Yeah . # Mm . # Oh I think that'll be nice ! # Yeah . # Then you haven't gotta worry about finding another one . # Couldn't you ? # Well , Jonathan don't do that while that's on because it ain't no good doing it ! # Well yeah get over Christmas and then you can start sorting yourself out really . # Mm that's right . # There's just a lot to think about isn't there ? # Yeah cos tha once Christmas is here , that'll soon come won't it ? # Jonathan goes to soon . # Next # Yep . # And won't you Sarah ? # You get the first week will seem a bit strange but once you get the first week over you're alright then . # And you're working . # Hopefully . # Well yeah , if he can get a job that is ! # How the job situation is these days ! # He can't a job . # Well he's a labourer really . # He erm , he didn't have a job for two weeks ! # He said he can't get unemploym erm the dole or nothing cos he's self employed ! # What ? # Twelve is it ? # He can't get any money se so so he can't get erm what do you call it ? # Social security # if you've got money in the bank ! # Well I said that's terrible that our boy should suffer because he's got money in the bank , and saved his money ! # He's gotta live off his ear off his money ain't he ? # Well he isn't certainly gonna dwindle # Too right Sarah ! # Yeah that's right ! # I said you're paid the same . # Well I ain't got any but they won't give me any ! # Well Well I think , I , I don't think it pays you to save up er # for your retirement and so you'll be comfortable off cos you might as well live off your state like everybody else . # You might # as well enjoy your money as you go along , why bother to have any ! # Why bother ! # Well I certainly isn't going to , Sarah ! # I shall get as much out the system as I can mate ! # Well I told you that . # Oh yeah , I think I've heard of that . # He's # Oh ! # Yeah . # Then they pay a lot # Terrible isn't it ? # That's right it wasn't # Alright fair enough they want you to buy your own property but now . # Oh ! # Phone Geoff ! # Well that's like there's jobs like # your dad and Geoff they pay a stamp at Turners don't they ? # They still have to pay a self employed one as well you know ? # I didn't know whether your dad knew that ? # You still have to pay it back , I said well I don't think you should have to pay it back ! # Yeah . # Well yeah , Geoff wouldn't be there if i if his business was running alright ! # Well I said I don't think that's to e you should pay two stamps myself ! # Like bloody ! # I feel like giving him away but I don't know whether I would , but I feel like it . # I'm surprised someone hasn't . # Which erm relative of 's has died ? # Well I reckon that's her mother or his mother . # Mm # Yeah because erm as we come home from work these two sort of big saloon cars , black ones sort of come up , mourning cars I suppose you call them and they stopped at 's and picked a load of people up . # No ! # But you mean , no not them Jonathan ! # And then as we was coming home from Pete's , a chap stopped us and asked us where was so I told him where was he said I'm looking for a little black and white house I said it's right there look ! # He was right up to it so I said well I don't know whether you're going round to view the house cos that's on the market aren't they ? # cos I said erm no I haven't actually , stop cos I said that # they got a death in the family today and then he said that's what we've come , we've coming to pick up granddad , so I reckon that is # her mother or his . # No ! # No ! # There was some smart cars round there today . # Well I said they haven't had the house yet ! # I bet that that's pretty as well . # haven't you ? # When I said , I think that's wrong ! # Well we have ! # Why have you got it ? # You haven't got to pay it ? # What about that last lot ? # Well you haven't paid it . # Well you can't stop paying it now . # Ooh good ! # Ah but perhaps Ken's the same as you then ? # Cos I shouldn't think he's made any profit . # Well you had a loss . # So a I said it's a shock # we didn't know you see , well Geoff paid it last year , well he di he di he didn't have to ! # Yeah we have . # Yeah made a fortune didn't they ? # And now he's nowhere earning # nowhere near that amount . # Mm . # He's halved them wages # has he ? # But I mean I I wouldn't even mind earning two hundred a fifty a week . # Yeah . # But then you want it . # They # So you're gonna get tax back as well , like you was told ? # Gonna get that back so I mean all these little bits # everybody else . # That's right Sarah . # You was . # Eight o'clock . # Geoffrey # wants one , don't you Geoffrey ? # Yeah . # Yeah that's right # Yeah . # Well forty pound a week's forty pound a week extra # innit ? # Yeah . # Jonathan ! # Would you go and check see what the heating's on ? # Oh # Nobody is ! # To get what ? # Oh bloody hell ! # Cor ! # Oh yeah . # They are peculiar breed ! # Cor ! # That's right . # Cor ! # Yeah . # Yeah . # All they seem to do to me is drink coffee ! # What again ? # Yeah well and think about all the other weeks he gets ,half term erm # Yeah . # Sometimes we get what they call baker days . # You know , so they don't do too badly they do quite well really . # Yeah . # Always bloody moaning ! # aren't they ? # And she said she even # taking her home Sarah ! # She weren't there , I had to go round the house knocking on her door and oh # Well yeah you don't mind giving anybody a lift # if they make their way to you . # Oh she actually told her then ? # Yeah . # Yeah . # Yeah Does she do any hairdressing yet or ? # Yeah . # Yeah . # No . # That family has more handouts than anybody I know ! # And the , what is the the thing what annoys me is they're working ! # That is what annoys about it or fair enough if they haven't got any money they get these handouts but when they're working and they still get them that's when I think it's wrong ! # Well course we are ! # My mo , I think my motto's gonna be , see if you can't beat them , join them ! # Been funny ? # And then they get divorced ! # Yeah . # Yeah . # Well you saved hard for it , so then why shouldn't you have it ? # That's what # you want to do with your money # that's up to you . # He's important # Sarah ! # About as big as your dad's bungalow ! # If you look round here cos he's right # opposite us . # He put # Well he's # I said to Geoff when you get your footings in they do you think to yourself , cor that ain't gonna be very big ! # But as soon as it builds up , you see how big it's gonna be so I said well that's gonna be like erm Buckingham Palace I should think ! # And do you know he's getting all # well he thinks he's gonna get his tiles for nothing isn't he , Geoff ? # No , but he's , he went to the Ideal # Homes Exhibition # and course they're doing this new tiles . # Cor must be really ! # he can help them ooh you want to ring him a my bricks should of cost what did he say ? # Four hundred or four hundred and forty or something erm and on , I can't remember what he said he was getting them for I # But we # Yeah . # Cos you see we was lucky how we got our bricks didn't we ? # Weren't # we Geoff ? # Well how did you get to know about them ? # Yeah Geoff sold him the car # and he said well he'd # got a load of brick , where did he have them # So we bought his bricks . # And that's how we got them . # He and Geoff went over there and loaded them on the trailer . # Yeah we do a we went over there and loaded them all on and then got a puncture in the trailer , ! # Yeah . # Geoff was getting the bricks . # Well we didn't do that but # Well I imagine there is . # Alright then I'm sorry that's not in there . # Yeah you can get it , yeah . # Yeah that's right . # What ? # Oh oh didn't look . # Yep , so what time is it , half past six is it , or do you want me quarter past six was it , or half six , what time do you want me ? # No , I'm home till quarter past eight . # Yeah . # Yeah , I'll come up to you then . # Yep . # Yeah , alright then mate . # You can turn that off now Jonathan . # Jonathan you , have you turned that tape off ? # Well turn it off now if you wanna watch in fifteen minutes . # Have you got all your school things ready ? # You got your trousers all muddled up . # Well it's not , very nice going to school with . # Your flys are undone ! # Ask him to have his undone then ! # Is he ? # And you don't play in blooming class will you ? # Erm what was I gonna say ? # Why don't you put your belt on them trousers ? # Go and get your coat then . # Do you have to go so early ? # Well why do you go so early ? # Oh . # Andrew who ? # Andrew ? # Why does he like going early ? # Oh do your coat up . # Don't forget your bike tonight . # I wondered if you'd help me out in the garden , perhaps like if it's still nice when you come home from school ? # Clear some of the leaves up . # Yeah if it's nice . # Yeah yeah that's right . # Pardon ? # You're not going today , you're going tomorrow . # Yeah I'll meet you up there look , look at her look , look who's looking in the window ! # Yeah go and let her in . # Hurry up ! # Alright then off are you ? # Yeah . # Pause it . # Yeah . # Yeah . # No ,because I'm frightened o I might I haven't done that . # No not now , you can perhaps try today . # Say bye to her . # You know what she wants . # Yeah and guess who hasn't been fed either ! # Ginge . # Alright then do you want to go then ? # Bye bye be a good boy won't # Oh yeah I can do bye then ! # Yeah bye ! # Twenty please , and have you got a birthday card for mother please ? # Ooh ! # Isn't it cold ! # Ooh I better have a grandma as well please ? # Oh crumbs yeah ! # Ooh ! # Ooh and I want a packet of sage and onion stuffing , whereabouts is that ? # Anywhere here ? # Yeah oh yeah Ooh God I'm knocking all the shop down ! # You got some good slippers on ! # There's always something isn't there ? # Is Rene here today ? # Oh that's nice with the little bunny rabbits on That's a nice one , the little bunnies innit ? # Oh shall gi and one for Jonathan erm nan # Oh those two will be alright . # Yeah lovely thank you and do you have stockings ? # I'll just have a look # Pop socks # Well # Tights # Are they all tights ? # Yeah that's not really the right colour for her erm what else can I think of ? # Have you tried this V P sherry ? # Well she drinks sherry you see I thought well is that a sweet sherry ? # Er # Cream sherry , that should be fairly shouldn't it ? # Yeah I'll have that then well the lovely thanks very much . # Did 's grandma die or something ? # 's # up the road . # Oh . # Oh the funeral was yesterday weren't it ? # Yeah where was she buried down here then ? # Cos she lived do # Oh was she ? # Oh I didn't know . # Oh . # Yeah I se well I happened to be coming home from school cos I thought there was a the hearse coming and then I watched two mourning cars two flashy great big things ! # I thought crumbs I bet that cost a lot ! # They do don't they ? # I thought how the other half live ! # I must be doing something wrong ! # Yeah it must be it's not cheap # to die is it ! # Crumbs ! # Don't worry about that Val I'll do it when I get home . # Yeah . # Did you really . # Yeah . # Was it really ? # Cor ! # Was it ? # Was he erm in the # Oh he's all sorts of things then ? # Yeah . # Yeah . # Yeah . # Really ? # Oh lovely . # Oh hello , I haven't seen you for ages ! # Hold on , do you want the fifty seven if I've got it ? # Yeah , I've got it five six seven . # Right lovely thank you Ah I suppose I better be off to work . # Yeah I don't wanna take a bottle of sherry round , the school will think I'm gonna be on the booze all afternoon do won't they ! # Pardon ? # Well yeah . # While they're talking about me they're leaving someone else alone aren't they ? # Not that I'm bothered what they say about me . # Right . # Cheerio ! # Yeah tara Val oh ! # You don't mind me doing this do you ? # That's alright is it ? # Alright then . # I switch it off now before I go out then ! # Ooh you weren't ! # Have you seen what's across there ? # What he's got in his back yard ? # Oh but one of these isn't gonna be ready for Christmas . # What . # Oh yeah , yeah 's have got them that was , that funeral was at 's that was her grandma I reckon that's # why she hasn't been to school she was in erm the . # Also got a bottle of sherry in here , I th people think I'm going on the booze ! # I bo just bought one up the shop for Geoff's mums birthday well she's now # starting to have a glass of sherry every night , well I thought well # if she can get a few bottles # that's saves her paying for it herself don't it ? # And I got her a box of Black Magic so that's her birthday present sorted out so she can eat and drink then can't she ! # Well she don't want ornaments and things like that , does she at her age ? # Ooh no # Does he like that ? # Yeah . # Well yeah he hasn't gotta buy # Well no . # See my dad likes videos and things like that but he wa he , I know he likes aftershave , he likes that Old Spice and that so I thought well I'll get him something like that or I thought I sort of saw cos I'm going shopping Saturday , I'm trying to get it all Saturday if I can . # So I thought well if I can sort of get think to myself a rough idea before I go Jonathan's going to Geoff's mums cos Geoff's gotta work all day Saturday you see ? # Well that's something to do with they're working this Saturday and then they break up a bit earlier or something . # Something like that , so I said well that's a good job I'm going this Saturday innit really ? # Ooh ! # I'm frozen ! # Mrs won't be there . # Oh yeah she was going with you mum isn't she ? # Who has she got , does she know ? # No probably not , no course she wouldn't I think Jonathan's with Mrs . # Oh yeah , she's going tomorrow no tomorrow , they go don't though . # Ooh ! # What this morning ? # Ooh ! # Oh ! # She isn't bringing the boyfriend is she ? # No she wouldn't would she ? # She wouldn't ! # Oh perhaps she's gonna try and # sort of you know , sort of get peace with you again Ooh ! # Oh ! # Yeah . # Oh ! # Oh ! # Yeah . # Perhaps she was frightened that she'd gotta # see you on your own . # Oh ! # Ooh you ha wait and see Is Graham at work today ? # Oh that's alright . # Oh yeah ! # Oh . # Morning ! # Yeah . # Has it ? # I think that's how it goes , you see , this is Geoff's busy time . # Do they ? # Oh ! # Oh yeah yeah # Well yeah that's how they go don't they , yeah . # Ooh ! # I'm in the infant end today aren't I ? # Can go in the hall can't they ? # Well that's right yeah . # Yeah cos I definitely shan't be out first shall I ? # Yeah . # Yeah and that's not fair , and that's cold today isn't it ? # Yeah . # Ask Eric yeah yeah cos there won't be that many will there ? # Ooh ! # Yeah do you know my washing was virtually dry when I went home yesterday . # I ju I # Yeah my flannelette sheets were virtually dry just # popped them on the radiator for ten minutes and I i well I ironed them I usually do my bits # Oh yeah . # Oh she wanted to do all sorts did she ? # She likes her granddad does she ? # Oh ! # God she didn't know ! # Oh yeah ! # How old is she now ? # Ooh so when would she go to school ? # Ooooh ! # Yeah . # Well they will do , cos they do here don't they ? # And does she like it ? # Yeah she's that type of little girl , ain't she ? # She's a , sort of outgoing isn't she ? # Ha ! # What she want for Christmas , did she say ? # Oh ! # Oh . # So what does Jack want ? # Oh ! # Oh yeah Jonathan used t # Yeah . # Does it ? # Oh she'll like that then won't it ? # Jonathan wants this erm this Lego set that's got well I have got it actually and it's a big lorry # with a helicopter and all that on the all on # the back I says # Is she still as blonde as ever ? # Yeah . # Does he make a lot of fuss of her then ? # She just took to him . # Oh . # Yeah . # Well that's good . # Ah ho ! # So Shaun's well in favour so he could look after her , I think she'd stay with him . # Oh , some of the older ones down the infant end again Jonathan went last week so I said he # I thought he weren't gonna bring them Sue ? # So she said I dunno so I said is it awkward to talk ? # She said yeah I said alright then so whether they'd got someone there then I don't know . # You don't know do you ? # Margaret's on this tape this time . # Ooh I don't how old Margaret is fifty two I think . # What ? # Where ? # Oh yeah ! # It seemed quiet in school today , didn't seem so many children , is there ? # I told you about Mr wife didn't I ? # Very poorly ! # Very poorly ! # That's a shame really innit ? # Ladies , L a d i e s innit ? # Arrived , A doubler i v e d # yeah . # Well I don't know whether Nick went today cos I see his car . # Oh what a shame ! # Oh ! # What's the time Geoff ? # Three thirty innit ? # Am or pm or is that ? # Well he'll perhaps get an interview fairly quick won't he , if they want people ? # Cor hey you , we're swearing a lot on that was they doing that for my benefit do you think ? # Cor blimey I wouldn't want to be there ! # What's the date today ? # Cor I wouldn't like working with that lot then ! # Mm . # They didn't . # Do you go in there then ? # So was Sally . # Well blow me ! # Well you were right in checking it , cos you sold her Escort didn't you ? # Well you'll have to tell him , you've done it . # Why can't they do anything till February ? # Oh alright then Er # you know we're going to your mum's tonight ? # And you know what I wanted , some Fairly liquid or they've gotta go up and get it . # Yeah . # Right Geoff . # You didn't go to Bound Zoo # Cambridge . # Mm . # so look # I put them # with my other little ducks . # He was very pleasant on the phone , very pleasant . # Well we were talking about mating . # Erm # You # They ain't got a mask or anything like Tutenkhamen has , have they ? # When do you see him ? # What ? # Oh no ! # A lovely little man weren't he ? # Why ? # isn't mentioned in the papers . # Well what has he done with it then ? # Cor , it didn't do that ! # Well we'll have to get our own then won't we ? # We're short on twenty two . # Where did you get the twenty two from then ? # Well Jimmy ought to tell her # Yeah well that don't help with getting your money though does it ? # Saved his money . # There's a problem . # Did he say , I'm desperate for my money ! # Why did it gobble his card up then ? # Ooh my God ! # Oh ! # Could you have that done to you then ? # You couldn't have that done to you ? # Alright . # And you said he's only just paid it , well # Well they should by law , surely ! # So he paid it ? # I don't feel like going up # thingamy tonight do you ? # But we ought to . # Well you're only going to grandma's . # He thought you meant going to Aunty Hilda's . # Well I'm gonna wash # up when I get back I suppose . # Well I can't wash up , I ain't got no Fairy liquid . # Well you just can't do nothing ! # You loved that did you ? # Cor ! # What did ? # Ooh it's for ages ! # He did promise # he'd bring some down . # Yeah . # Is he a Liverpool supporter then ? # My God ! # Ooh . # And he did . # What just cos Liverpool didn't win ? # Oh why do they do that to him ? # Ooh are there any strawberries in that ? # You like yoghurts don't you ? # Mind cos it's all down # Strawberries in syrup dad would like strawberries . # You ever tried a little bit of that ? # Gosh , you know it tastes crea , don't taste like yoghurt . # No dad don't want it # it might make him feel sick . # Dad was gonna ring you up at eight o'clock before you went to school and say # have a nice day and # someone was on the phone . # No . # Why's that ? # What is catty then ? # Well they come from the right area , don't they ? # Let's face it . # You can't get any worse than that can you ? # No ! # Why ! # Yeah well I would of thought it'd been nice , been nice to have # somebody happy around instead of miserable . # I suppose he does it on purpose don't he ? # With who ? # Why ? # Why aren't you drinking that ? # They fell over . # Ooh Christ ! # Oh ! # and then # So what he say ? # Well that's silly comment can't be doing him any good ! # Well then what did he say ? # Well he must of had that amount he must be contin , he must have alcohol in the body continuously . # So he never gets over it does he ? # And got up at four . # I should think he looked like nothing on earth did he ? # Well he's gonna kill his self isn't he ? # Anyway he's just rotting his bowel , he'll be rotting his liver next ! # And what did he say ? # Nothing . # Well it is a shame innit ? # He was a different man . # Mm . # And that makes him worse , really . # But they talk # behind your back ! # Yeah , . # Gonna see him ? # And say what ? # Well he perhaps won't do it any more now you've told him . # Well for heaven's sake , how many does he have ? # How many bottles does he have ? # What and forty pints in a night ! # Well is he an alcoholic ? # Well he's happy enough behind all this isn't he ? # Well I'm , I must admit I don't know . # What ? # He's rotting his stomach isn't he ? # Yeah . # You can put up with that , good God ! # Yeah . # Well I should think that's acidity in his stomach innit ? # Where's he get the pain ? # In his side ? # I think he's rotting his liver , that's the feeling . # . # Well I still alcohol . # Yeah alcohol # Guinness is a heavy drink ! # That's surprising he don't have such a bad head ! # Ah Cor ! # Well fancy being a like that all that time it's bad enough when you've been out on a binge and you get that headache then . # Well how are you all gonna get home ? # Well it isn't worth it , you can't afford to drink and drive can you ? # Mel's got her lights up , did you see them ? # . # Oh alright then . # I thought you'd done that , you was gonna do that ? # What do you mean ? # Did you tell him that ? # Malcolm . # She'll know . # And just do it on the money you owe on the house . # Yeah but that don't help us with Malcolm does it ? # Give him as much as yo , we can , when we can . # And can you do # What , is he gonna lend , what's he gonna lend you then ? # No there's no problem that we can # have it ? # But you can't have it till February . # Yeah . # Well we can manage that probably # couldn't we ? # But you'll have to ring Malcolm and tell him Geoff because he'll be on the phone to Miriam . # Was he alright ? # Malcolm or # Ah we ain't but you must pay your mother too , Geoff ! # And then there's Andy as well . # Well why don't you pu yo well did you # use that other thousand ? # Or is that still in the bank ? # Or have we used it all now ? # Well you do dad's two you give to him # Yeah , well then you had that rest well there should # be quite a bit in that account because there was only one six that went through for this insurance and there hasn't been a lot more going through this month . # So you got erm quite a bit . # Yeah well come on then cos I want to get to mum's cos I'll do that washing up when I come back shan't I ? # Well then tha I hope you should help erm this weekend # Ooh for goodness sake ca can't you write a cheque out for that David ! # And that other one's got to be paid within seven days so we # Well , how long has go got , till next week ? # Oh . # Alright then . # You ain't drunk your coffee , do you wannit ? # And I'll wash up when I come back . # Well you'll have help me # when I come back I thought . # I won't get a Fairy Liquid , your mother might have one . # I ain't gonna bother to count it # cos does the mortgage come out of that sixty grand # dunnit ? # No , what I'm gonna say to you about this # Have you put him in ? # Get and you lot never told me that Renault went out last night ! # Nobody told me about that ! # That's a bloody good job I didn't have a booking for it . # Yeah but I I'd rather know , cos I ,don't know where I am ! # Erm see Mrs can have # for fifteen . # Let me cross her out and put fifteen in there . # Thirty five , that's there . # Right ? # Then the 's want you to fill the bus up with petrol . # They're a hundred and seventy miles . # Well I'm sure that's why I've put that there look , that's the same colour pen no one else is got anything so it is them . # Erm , I think she's bringing that back erm early hours of the morning , at # twelve , about twelve o'clock . # So , but what I'm saying is you've got a twelve here and oh well that wouldn't make no difference cos she'll have that back , that'll be ready for them na yeah well then we got a twelve there as well ! # That's what , that's what I was trying to tell you . # So now he's gonna have the twelve minibus erm what do you call him ? # Darren ? # I'll put Darren well that is clean cos I cleaned that up . # Well we got a lot going on this haven't we ? # And I've got to try and get to work , get home , get my jobs done and get these cleaned as well I don't know how I'm bloody gonna do it all ! # I'm hoping your not gonna be home too late . # Well see Carole and them are bringing that back tonight at her erm his son is gonna come back and then # they're gonna leave that here # so if I get up there and do it early in the morning , well it don't get light till half seven # well I could do that first I think before I do anything else so that'll mean I've got to do so that if the long is clean # Is it filthy then ? # Oh get off , sorry darling . # Yeah well that's gotta be cleaned as well sometime , for him nine o'clock that morning , well I can't get all that done , by myself ! # Well that erm well it all # depends what time I'm back from you see I , I wanna try and get them hours in tomorrow # So then that means me fri , I like to leave Friday # free . # So the Sierra I can do ready for you to take to Kevin on Fri Friday night is it ? # Yeah well that isn't a prob well well perhaps that'll be better if I had er long wheel base down here and do that first , that goes out first ? # But how can I I can't get it down here you see , not unless you go and dropped it off like # Yeah well now that bell gone it's out on # so you gotta tax that . # So get your papers ready and everything tonight # and we'll give it to your mum tonight . # So # Oh no , well don't worry then . # So and the estate I've gotta clean up . # Now did Jimmy have that , today ? # Oh ! # I don't know what you done with it , I never see it . # So what's today ? # Wednesday erm # What ? # Oh well you can write it on again can't you ? # Do it when you come home I'm just saying a bit # Did you find that other bit of paper ? # Ooh Christ ! # Well that's there somewhere Geoff , cos I wouldn't throw nothing away , you know I don't . # Ah ! # Is that it ? # Oh bugger me , that was inside # that book ! # Give us that here ! # I put this is where I put my # stuff I want # to keep ! # In there . # Here Jonathan , here's your mat , now # And I must do my cubs this weekend , both of them . # Ah look ! # Come on petal . # Yep , well I want to get going Jonathan cos I've er # Do your flies up . # Go and get your shoes on jacket on . # Cos I gotta wash up when I come back # and sandwiches also . # Go on . # Come on love , . # I'll turn this off now shall I ? # Fairy Liquid . # We thought we didn't know what to buy you and I know you like chocolates and I know you've started to drink sherry , so I thought well # They were what ? # What ? # Oh does granddad have one ? # Seeing as it's your birthday , yeah that's right , happy birthday for tomorrow anyway . # You'll be at cup final on Thursday . # Let's hope you win . # Well I was gonna change them but you might as well . # Ooh lovely I do like them walnut . # I said and they already # Mending the cars and different signals . # Yeah we got one using six # Yeah . # Well I thought well if # we come earlier we can go back earlier cos of Geoff cos you know so I fetched him . # I get to feel like anyway . # Yeah . # Well I thought it was a little bit different myself . # I like rabbits as you know . # That's what Susan bought him didn't she , for his birthday last time ? # He wears this one for school . # That's what he bought today . # And he bought , he bought me # and Geoff a lovely # little duck . # I said he are , give him the money to spend on his self ! # I didn't as , I did tell you you shouldn't of bought me anything ! # That's brown ain't it ? # Are you working tomorrow granddad ? # Oh . # Oh I thought he'd finished , he'd finished ? # Yeah . # I thought Val said he was having three days holiday ? # Well somebody said # . # Well I don't mind . # Well that's what Val told me . # Well he hasn't has he ? # I said that's bo , that's bothered me about that bleeding , I like him a lot . # Blow him ! # We don't want him grandma that's why he can't get # a vehicle from anybody else cos I think he's messed # everybody up there ! # I tell you I think he owe a lot of money . # Well we've got a tenner to go have we ? # He was desperate to get there desperate ! # Absolutely # desperate ! # Not till today . # Well he weren't gonna have my vehicle . # Did you read them that couple in there ? # He had what ? # That's how he was in the first place though . # Jonathan ! # Why don't you sit on the pouffe and let grandma sit there . # There's a place there ! # Shift up then ! # Oh well I ain't bothered ! # I'm afraid she was rude to us ! # We put up a lot with him ! # Not on # he won't ! # And put the miles on the clocks . # Yeah he'd have probably blown the bloody thing up ! # Well I rang you just in case you know I don't want yo how we need the money so I thought to myself Cornwall , twenty eight ? # I thought well that ain't worth it ! # But I'd rang the number # you see , well I put the phone down . # Well no . # Up and down # You could let they wouldn't let anyone put him in . # Well he's a liar ! # But do you know # now would Paragon garage not have a car in in the middle of the week ? # Well about he erm Rent-a-Van ? # He'd have them in . # And he reckoned he'd been there ? # He hadn't # got one ! # He don't want to come down to me cos I shall send him off ! # I shall say # Yes , so are you . # So she said . # No not yet , I've only just had my tea ! # Half of one . # Ken's got a bit more to do then ? # I should think he'll be glad when that's done won't he ? # Who's machine is it ? # You mean he's gotta pay for it ? # Does he hire it ? # Oh ! # Oh so yo , when you've finished you just take it back sort of thing ? # Oh I see . # What's Geoff eating ? # Oh Geoff , you've only just had your tea ! # No I can't eat one . # Ooh I can't eat one yet . # What's he doing ? # Jonathan mind ! # Don't open that one ! # Let grandma open which one she wants ! # What's grandma done with her nest of tables ? # Oh blimey ! # Grandma # Aha . # That's what I'd like . # Cor isn't Mr a weird looking ! # Oh ! # And went . # What have you given me that for ? # What have you done Jonathan ? # Let me take that off of there . # Who ? # No . # Yes . # You got my glass Jonathan ! # I said I was looking I said where's grandma , I put that ne table there is that alright ? # Well I thought what's grandma done with her nest of tables ? # So I was looking for , I didn't know where it was and I thought well # I think it looks nice like . # It's more homely . # Well on the phone you'd think he was business ex ec the way he talks ! # What does he do now then ? # Cor he isn't keen on this ! # No . # What do you say ? # We know how you feel ! # He always pays you though don't he Geoff ? # No problem at all . # In what one ? # Yeah she likes a glass of sherry don't she ? # Yeah . # I don't think a glass of sherry hurts them . # I should think you'll be tired tonight anyway Jonathan . # Well you wanna go # he's been going to bed too late ! # Well Jonathan # couldn't get to sleep last night . # He's got a # bit of co well I said he's come in ain't he ? # But you see he don't feel the cold ! # But I made him put his coat on . # He # He drinks it too quick . # Well that don't hurt does it . # Why , a couple of sherries isn't gonna # make or break you is it ? # They should help you to sleep really . # Not yet ! # What , you mean you # drink too much ? # Well that won't hurt you ! # Couple of glasses of sherry ! # Mm . # I always # find sherry burns my stomach ! # No I feel it here I do . # I had one yet , I'm gonna # I weren't gonna have one # cos I've only just had my tea # but I will try a little one . # Very nice . # Where is Blackie ? # aren't you gonna let her in ? # I said I've ruined this tracksuit haven't I ? # The kitchen door . # I know it is , I see you picked the # figures . # Did he ? # Well Geoff did buy me some sherry glasses he says oh , you give me two # like very similar to this . # Mm . # You make nice pastries , nice and light . # Mm . # No I said to Geoff well I hope he don't come back . # That bloke , I don't want him coming # You ought to you ought to say to him , I shall ring the police , you come round here any more ! # I don't want him , it worried me that he might come and bother your mother . # I know you can . # Well I tell you something if he ke , if he does start to hassle us I shall ring the police and I shall tell them ! # I shan't have no qualms about it , I shall say well he's hassling me and my mother-in-law and we can do without it ! # Ha ! # That's right . # Oh . # That's right . # Hello Blackie ! # Hello ! # Cor she's getting a fluffy coat isn't she , now ? # And you went after them ? # Well Geoff's nearly got a smack in the ear hole today ! # Well yesterday . # No , she hasn't drunk the first one yet ! # Yeah she is quite cold isn't she , on the phone ? # And he had # And you went and he didn't ? # Innit marvellous ! # Well I suppose yeah cos they could set on him on his own # he wouldn't stand a chance would he ? # They , they normally have a back up all the time don't they , policeman ? # They're never normally on their own are they ? # I gotta catch him ! # Well I said if you stand there long enough I said , you'll catch him ! # I sa # Yeah . # And then give theirself away don't they ? # They were flashing their lights . # What's the matter dear ? # You better ask grandma . # He wants another glass of sherry grandma . # What time ? # And that's all you have , you don't have # no more Jonathan ! # aren't you feeling very well Jonathan ? # He's got a bit of cold that's all . # I think he's had a busy day . # Perhaps getting a bit tired . # There you are that'll perk you up then . # What do you say ? # Well done . # Ooh you naughty boy ! # Yeah might as well yeah . # You'll soon finish that bottle ! # That's what I said ! # Oh I thought it had . # We'll have to make sure we get a bottle of sherry in for Christmas Geoff . # Well we usually # what do we usually drink ? # Sherry # whisky # Oh advocaat you like ? # Yeah . # Yeah and you wouldn't be , feel very well . # You won't have it if you're gonna drink it quick . # Did you have another one ? # Ooh crumbs ! # Well you can't you know # I know your car's getting # old but i i it yeah but it don't look erm # that rust . # But you get some , they're full of rust and it makes you wonder # how they keep on the road , don't it ? # Well you'd you'd think they wouldn't want them on the road cos if they had an accident the people would get killed , they'd just # crumble wouldn't they ? # Oh ? # when was that other one ? # He's a big old boy , John ! # Cor is he ! # Same age # virtually . # Well when he was so and it # What are you doing ? # Erm # when he was a little # baby , he was # such a puny sickly looking thing ! # But # cor his head and shoulders taller than you isn't he Jonathan ? # He is , he's he's a # lot bigger than me . # Ooh yeah ! # He weighs # How much no he's tall , lot ta bigger than that isn't he Geoff ? # He's a lot taller # than Jonathan , John is a big old # boy isn't he ? # How much does J erm John weigh ? # Nine and # Nine and a half stone ? # Well weighs ten and a half ! # Well I said I think that's far # too fat for young girls ! # Oh she's like a bull # elephant ! # See if her m # Well if her mums was to slim her # down now . # Well no she did go on a diet , she used to go and see a dietician # at the hospital . # Kerry # I think # she weighed nine and half didn't she ? # And she's what ? # Nine years old . # Do you # mind if I have a cigarette ? # I want an ashtray , go get us one . # No I know I ain't started it ! # I don't have to rush ! # No you're not having # any more of it ! # You shouldn't drink it quickly ! # That's wrong to drink all that ain't it ? # Yeah . # Well I'm hoping he's gonna go to bed not too late tonight . # ? # Mm . # That's right . # Where you going Jonathan ? # Cor ! # Well I te is it , you know how # cos I walked home with Liz tonight # cos , I had to go and pick Jonathan up didn't I ? # Cos it was getting dark and he hadn't got his light # on and I didn't I said to him I'll come and meet you a I said you can come to the hall cos that's ever so light through there # cos all them ,so oh and talking about that , I see the Manor House er you know the one on The Chase # I see that all lit up look at that , look nice ! # So I thought # cor blimey I could live in there ! # That looked really lovely ! # Oh yeah what was I saying erm # Oh yeah , so I walked with her . # Well her little granddaughter's a lovely little girl ! # But she's immaculately clean ! # Well I don't know what's happened to Kevin then ! # Cos that little girl's immaculate ! # No we're not playing that tonight # Jonathan , we've come down to sa talk . # Well sh # Well he can play with the bits . # We're not playing it , not # tonight ! # He said Lotto ! # Oh yeah I thought he'd put # That was your dad's . # The trailer . # You don't see that sort of thing now , parts # do you ? # And I suppose that's the in # Where ? # Where did you sit on the bus ? # Oh you didn't sit on the back seat then ? # Had # they ? # Yeah cos you # oh we used to have , when we used to go on the strawberry field # we used to have lu er # our lunch packed up in one # of them Oxo tins # didn't we ? # Well is she upset cos we're sitting on her seat ? # Yeah but they like to be close . # Yeah my cat # does . # But cat's do I think . # She can't hear you Jonathan . # She does look nice . # No , not yet ! # He # he knows he gets a meal when he comes up there . # We should . # Why ? # Oh ! # That's that # do you know that bloody ginger cat , I'm not kidding you # I feed that ever so well ! # And do you know that still getting on ! # Cor crikey ! # Checking it over . # She does look well though , don't she look lovely with a big glossy coat ? # Oh I don't think anybody would beat beat my cat's coat though . # A there isn't that about today . # She's gotta say v e t , cos # he don't like it ! # He don't like it . # Well he's had bad breath she calls him dragon's breath ! # He's had bad breath for a long while and she said his tee , cos she tried to clean his teeth with a toothbrush . # So he's having an anaesthetic today . # Mum well Susan took him this morning so he was to have it done early at eight # And mum was gonna pick him up dinner time cos he is so # frightened ! # And they don't like him there cos he makes too much noise . # Well they do , they like to get # rid of them . # Susan said well I'll try and get rid of him as quick as I can . # So I shall have to ring her tonight when I get home , see how she # got on with him . # Well I rang mum # but she weren't there so , whether and then I rang down Susan's , I thought they might be there but nobody answered the phone , so I thought well # But that's a shame when they don't like it isn't it ? # But Susan said last time he disrupted all the other cats and dogs ! # Said he ma he makes , she said he makes such a funny noise ! # But you see he don't like being caged i she said if you sit # him in the car he'll sit there . # But she said you put him in his box , and cover it up , he don't like it ! # Now Guzzy tries to get in the vans and that when I'm cleaning them . # I mean does . # It's ever so funny ! # But # ju I , I tell you something tha I reckon she's going through a mad state ! # Do you know did I tell you when she was asleep the other day ? # In the boiler cupboard on top of all the shoes ! # And then she'll sleep she won't sleep actually in the airing cupboard , she'll sleep so the door's wide open and she's half way across the la , and she sleeps you know # you know the toilet ? # She shapes her sor self round the toilet ! # When you want to go to the loo you've gotta put your # no you gotta put your legs over cos she wouldn't move out the way ! # And do you know , I di # I didn't tell you did I ? # The other day she sat near her water bo , well you know how they sit with all the their little paws in ? # she sat there right near her water bowl looking at it ! # And I thought whatever's she sitting there for ? # When I looked she ain't got not water ! # I said well she couldn't of told me any more could she ? # But she seems to plonk her body down anywhere don't she Geoff ? # Just plonks down ! # And she lays all on top of the all on top of the dressing ta and she's never done it before has she ? # She's on top of all my dressing table , she # she don't knock nothing off ! # Yeah ? # Yeah . # Did she really ? # Oh our cat's most peculiar ! # How long we had her ? # How long we had h , we had her when we had erm she was a kitten when had Guzzy when Guzzy was , weren't very well , and that was just before Guzzy weren't very well , cos she didn't really like her did she ? # So how old is she ? # Well yeah didn't we find her on that , I tell you # when it was when I had that little Renault Five because erm , she used to she used to get under the bonnet didn't she ? # When we used to go to school in the morning I used to have to lift the bonnet up to see if she # I've had her more than three years surely ? # Yeah . # Oh yeah . # Yeah cos # Yeah well didn't someone we found her didn't we ? # Yeah well # we found her . # bought her over # But she couldn't drink milk could she ? # What ? # Oh her eyes were all stuck up and that . # And we started to feed her didn't we ? # And we gradually bought the dish nearer the door and then she gradually come in didn't she ? # No Blackie got co , run over didn't he ? # She's got Louey now ! # Oh no Blackie got killed one night last year . # Ooh Carole was # absolutely devastated ! # Weren't she Geoff ? # Yeah , the night of her party . # Well she reckoned there was , cos they were , they had a lot company there # yeah and he went and she said well it that'd always been across that road # and erm # but the boys who have knocked him down come and told her didn't they ? # They went round Val's and Val said ooh no she said I think that's Caroles . # But they did pick him and tell her . # Well no , they went and picked him up didn't they ? # They told her though . # Mm . # Well there's a cat , I don't know who's black and white cat it is it comes from the council houses and that stands in the middle of the road ! # It lays down in the middle of the road ! # I thought ooh my God you get a fast car round here mate you won't # dicing with death ! # Yeah . # Yeah but he always seems to want some # Erm # Who's this , who did I # say got the Belmont at the weekend Geoff ? # ? # Yeah she did # ring me Miss . # So how much # did you charge them ? # Well you can't charge them too much for that or you'll # You'd better ring Ca Carl tonight , sort out that battery . # Well if he's there that is cos Joanne was bringing the car back . # Well I reckon he's # got a job on today # Chris his erm daughter's had her baby . # Yeah so he's a grandfather . # So he's a grandfather . # And yeah cos I said to her well what do we call you then ? # She said aunty she said I'm not gonna be called a grandmother ! # At twenty five ! # Twenty five . # Well I don't think so # Yeah well I think anybody does # if your hair's # untidy you feel unti # Well she had jeans and erm # sort of nice sort of boots on and a sweatshirt tucked in and a belt on she looked like a teenager really . # You're not having any more after that ! # Look grandma will be drinking that bottle ! # Well it isn't gonna take # very long . # No that's it , you don't have no more ! # What're you gonna do Saturday ? # You like doing those don't you ? # You'd drink , you'd think you wouldn't think a child would like sherry would you ? # Yeah I know . # He drinks it too quick Jonathan , as I said that ain't the drink you should drink # Dad don't dad don't drink any more does he Geoff ? # He used to have a bottle of whisky a week but he don't have any now he ain't had it for a long time has he ? # Well that gives him indigestion . # Oh ! # You got your Christmas cards yet grandma ? # Have you got them ? # You ought to get them out of Superking they're quite nice . # Down the bottom end there one they aren't ever so dear , one forty something . # Well I got mine from Superking I never ordered them did I ? # Mm . # He's drunk that ! # Now that's , no more don't ask for # No , cos you'll do # You'll be drunk ! # Ooh # Yeah . # Thursday . # Oh no , we've been out since then haven't we ? # Oh yeah that is , yeah that is right , a year ago yeah ! # No # Yeah well we , we haven't been out for one # since last year . # We haven't been out at all . # What ? # I wouldn't wha , where was that place in town we was looking at ? # Where we said that looked ever so nice ! # Four pou , that was only four pound something ! # We said we might go in . # Cos they do , me and Jonathan love lasagne we do , and they # do lasagne on there don't they ? # Must be ki quite good then . # Why don't you pull your jumper down Geoff ? # Good God ! # Do you know # Geoff's put all that weight back on he lost ? # Well he said , we didn't think he'd lost weight , that'd # he'd toned his muscles up . # She's had a real spruce up . # Jonathan don't ! # I know . # Yeah . # Where ? # Well Jonathan's going out , he's gonna the # So don't you fi do it at all ? # Bleeding hell ! # You're not going , can I have one of your ? # Mm my mum makes these . # Nice . # Well I shan't look forward to going home and washing up . # Well we said last night , we didn't think we was ever gonna get to bed ! # Why ? # They've froze his bank account ! # Mm yeah but I should think they're insured for that . # Well yeah . # Hey what are they doing ? # Mm . # Yeah well I said to Geoff , well I hope Geoff soon gets his money because he owes Geoff a lot of money at the moment ! # . I said well we need that really , this # this week ! # Well we're not heavily in arrears are we ? # We are in arrears but we're gonna be # Yeah it worked out what , about nine hundred pound innit ? # Well you see nine hundred pound that's only sort of your half yearly rent is it ? # So we we're not # Yeah we pay that for a year . # That's a bloody good job that is all it is ! # Cos I didn't know how we'd of managed if we'd had a big one ! # But he said to Geoff don't pay it off all in one lump sum # He told him not to do that , he said just pay when you got some and # pa , pay what you can so it gets it down # so you're catching up # but don't go and pay it all off . # You're mum's worried she hasn't paid any poll tax since August ! # She hasn't had a form or nothing ! # I said we'll worry about it when it comes ! # But she don't want to get what we've had , she's gotta pay it in advance # Jonathan ! # Put your feet down ! # Put your feet down ! # No you can't take your top off ! # Oh yeah . # Well Susan goes in there ! # Well look , leave it and when she pays hers , pay # yours ! # Yeah so we're gonna # ours in a fortnight # she'll take # my sister'll take yours as well . # She pays ours , she pays her own , so she wouldn't mi she's going there . # So leave it a fortnight and then we've gotta pay ours so then you can sort yours out . # Yeah , that's right . # You got then a little to draw on if you # need poll tax . # Yeah well you won't have brand new tyres will you ? # Just these blankets all over ! # Yeah . # Really ? # ! # They've been trained from early age haven't they ? # What ? # Yeah but yo to me , that's near enough teaching them children all that but to me , them children want to mix with other children . # Yeah but # I think it's wrong ! # Well don't , if that child doesn't want to do it , I think that's wrong to make her . # Well she hasn't ! # He said it's tha , that is what he said if you don't want to do it , you don't have to ! # Well she's got something # Well then how's she bloody done it ? # No . # I wouldn't want it , I like my evenings to relax ! # Mm . # Wednesday # Was she ? # Cor you'll make some money erm # in the next month then . # Cos they had shopping you see . # Money's not everything . # I'd like to have a little bit more but I # don't make , I don't , I wouldn't want to be # Well I always consider me and Geoff worked along , so far # so that's long enough for me , I think ! # I'd work a lot less if I could . # Mm . # Well yes , that's right . # Mm . # Oh no ! # Yeah . # Oh ! # Yeah . # Have you cleaned your brass grandma ? # Looks shiny ! # Mm . # Well I don't Geoff ! # I wouldn't ! # Well blow me ! # Well we've had a go well I think it was for erm some sort of I think was for multiple sclerosis # or something like that . # Anyway the tickets were twenty five pence each , so we all had one at work and you'd gotta guess # No , Jenny bought them . # You gotta guess the weight of this Christmas pudding that's a great big Christmas pudding , and they tell you how many j erm jars of this and how many tins of that and how many pounds of sugar and and you've gotta guess the weight . # And the first prize is two hundred and fifty pounds worth of carpet . # Well I don't think they'll know what'll it weigh until they weigh it . # You just # Mm . # I never did # get my things from Encyclopedia Brittanica did I ? # Con weren't it ! # Don't know I won third prize on the draw and I # never did get it . # I said well why don't you se she said well you've gotta come and pick the books , I said well I can't come all that way , I said it's hardly worth my while , I said why don't # you send me gift token ? # Yeah . # How much you gonna win ? # Well I hope you win it . # Spend it save it . # No you wouldn't save it all would you ? # A lot , wouldn't have a lot left ! # He's always wanted a . # Do you remember that time you and James and Marie had Julian's . # And nearly hit the police car # didn't they ? # But i # Who ? # What's the matter with him ? # And they nearly hit it . # No don't put them near the table ! # Oh good . # There's nothing worse than stomach ache # though # is there ? # No you mustn't do don't # isn't he he's eating hot bread isn't he ? # Geoff's # been trying to look for a bit of paper and I opened a book today and found it ! # What you done ? # Oh ey . # Well he lived like a millionaire an # lived like erm # lived like erm royalty and he'd got no money had he ? # I'm at work . # Just a minute ! # Can they ? # Ooh we better make sure we pay ours on time then . # Yeah that's a bit of a worry , the rent , isn't it # for you ? # There aren't many people say that nowadays # is there ? # No don't be silly ! # I bet she is . # He don't want to . # I don't like him Geoff ! # That dark haired one # I don't like him ! # Ooh no that's the dark one . # I'm not keen on him . # A biggish feller , with dark hair . # Well fairly tall , fairly sort of stocky build . # No . # Well this is her is it her brother , is ? # We only found that out the other day ! # A Pogey # Well that policem that police woman was telling us about Southall Road di # weren't she ? # She's ever # so nice , she lives in the village , she's erm what is she , Indian or something ? # or # Yes but # She lived in Walton Pier # In them bungalows , little bungalows . # Well she co and cor , do you know she'd got beautiful nails ! # Yeah I couldn't really help no , I thought to myself ooh my God , I put mine like that ! # But , she was extremely nice # weren't she Geoff ? # Get your shirt on . # Oh ! # Oh ! # I said to her # I said I don't mind this doing statement , I said , but I am not going to court ! # So she said well I'll put that on the thing , but she said if it goes to Crown Court you'll have to , I said well # they'll have to take me , I said but I'm not going . # Erm # No , who was that I'd gotta a statement about then ? # . # Yeah . # Well I said Geoff might have to go to that because he was driving Geoff's car , if I remember rightly ! # Without us knowing , weren't he ? # No ! # She did , and he drove it ! # Alan said another bugger ! # They're all at it ! # I said I ta # Well that's a funny thing # that's a funny thing on the phone when he said about paying I said a hundred a six pound complete so I said and don't give me a cheque cos I don't want one ! # Do you know where was he gonna pay the money from ? # If he ain't got it ! # He thought he was gonna have it on tip again I think . # Well we all see the other tenner but that don't make any difference , as long as we got the main . # Well what have # we gotta say if he comes to want to hire a car ? # No ? # No . # He won't get one off of me ! # I shall say to him you was rude to my mother-in-law and # that's it ! # But i , I don't think he can go to anybody else . # I think that's why he comes here cos nobody # else wants to entertain him . # Well he told me he nearly strangled him ! # No , Healey # No he said , I can't bear him , he said I nearly bloody strangled him ! # I thought to myself it's a pity someone didn't strangle you mate ! # They shouldn't really should they ? # Yeah you're wise to lock it really . # He's a rough and ready man isn't he ? # Mind you , your money's always there # and you know where you stand with him . # Who paid for that then Geoff ? # Good God , that's good innit ? # Who's his solicitor , I think we ought to get in contact with him ? # Yeah # that's what I was saying about Geoff's car really you know that chap taking it and righting off and we didn't got a penny for it , I ca , I can't see how that's right ! # Well that's it ! # Well erm # well I suppose their motto is , she had a C D ten on her driving licence , I suppose she shouldn't of had it in the first place so if she hadn't of had it , he wouldn't of got it ! # But that still ain't the point ! # Geoff did not # hire it to him ! # He hired it to her whether she'd got a C D ten # yeah but if she'd of had the accident they could of said no , she's got a C D ten on her driving licence , she shouldn't have been driving it ! # Well fair comment . # But he weren't even supposed to have it , so # that ma , I said to Geoff , to me ,you know , we'd like to get a solicitor on it but you see we # No ! # Oh well she # Well I tell you something , I think you ought to compile a letter together to somebody , and try and sort some it isn't gonna cost you nothing to write a letter ! # Well I don't know who ! # I just don't know what to think ! # I don't know who well I don't know whether you ought to write to the chief constable and explain the situation , all the # aggro we've had of and forms and then writing letters to him # and being lost and # Well that wouldn't of helped i # And somebody taking them ! # She di , she didn't ha # The car was at home . # And he took it . # Yeah but then he knew he had # No she left the keys in the house . # Yeah but you don't t , if you're not using the car # you don't carry a well a # And he picked it up # Well that's it , as far as I'm concerned , it's theft ! # And that is all # And he was convicted of theft ! # Well course it is ! # Well then yo , you should have rung her up and said did he break in the caravan ? # She should of said yes , and then we perhaps would of got paid out ! # Yeah but she'd kicked him out anyway , hadn't she ? # Well that's a pity she ain't said she had ! # Well I'd I'd I just cannot see how it's fair ! # Until you want paying out ! # Well that's a different sort of kettle of fish . # Well that's bloody right ,yo # Well I'd # Yeah . # Bloody hell ! # Ooh ! # With # With all this er # this forensic stuff and that , they can do anything . # Are we now ? # Right I'll get my coat on then . # Yeah mum's gotta wash up and pack the sandwiches . # You'll have him from Friday . # Well the I ain't gotta bother to bring him down Saturday morning ! # Dad bring you sometime Friday . # no # That's grandma's night out and that's # grandma's birthday . # Come on ! # No leave it , that's alright for a minute ! # Come on else you'll get your dad cross . # He's gonna do what ? # Come on ! # It's cold when you get in the car innit ? # I shouldn't bother with it . # That was lovely grandma # thank you . # Jonathan get your shirt on cos we're ready # to go ! # Did you really ? # You can see the little light look Jonathan . # Well you can turn it off now Geoff . # Ooh I'm cold ! # What's that mate ? # Well we'll see . # Well I don't , I wouldn't like to say would you Geoff ? # This is pretty this car innit ? # All them lights ! # That must cost a fortune to have them on ! # We'll be going into a warm house , that's one thing . # I don't find it very warm at your mum's , do you ? # Well you've got a bit of a cold . # Well you can't have not medicine because you've had erm # alcohol . # Oh I shouldn't say that , should I really ? # Well it wouldn't do you a lot of good with erm sherry . # I think she was pleased to see us . # I don't suppose they get a lot company do they ? # Not at all . # Oh I ain't bothered , I'm not watching telly anyway , I want to get the you two will have to help me out , when I get home . # Well dad can start packing his lunch up while I wash up if he likes . # Erm you can get # yourself to bed ! # Ooh no you can get in the bath ! # Ooh look he's got all his lights up ooh blimey they've got some lights ! # What is the time ? # Well not unless you want to get up in the morning and have a bath Jonathan , it's up to you . # But you mustn't hang about in the morning then , neither ! # I'll wake you up at quarter past seven , you can get straight in . # Dad did , yeah just before he went out today . # Well yeah that's right . # Well I don't know , it's fairly important Geoff . # Well not that's right . # You think of all the lights what are on all them electric bills ! # All the po the population , you'd think blimey there must be billions # of pounds spent on electricity mustn't there ? # Mind you can't mana well I suppose you could manage without it but that wouldn't be so easy would it ? # Well yeah . # Well I'm surprised people don't do that . # Well yeah . # Well no , that's right . # They never did sell that did they ? # I'm surprised Pete didn't try and get that . # Oh did they tell you what he was on about erm # i who's that firm at the side of him who's just gone # liquidation or whatever it is . # Yeah , he wants to buy that bit of land , he said I don't care if I have to mortgage myself up to the hills he said ! # Who's it to do with ? # Oh , I shall have to tell him then he a # Ahhh yeah , I shall have to tell him then . # Ahhh I shall have to tell him then , he said cos that'll come up for sale then . # Oh he wants to go to Russell then don't he ? # What was that just shot round that ? # Some boys with white trainers on , I thought it was a cat ! # Do you know poor old Nicky wanders about that bloody place , you don't know what to do with yourself ! # He had Jason's car today ! # Oh !cat's in the hall look . # Wait a minute Geoff ! # Yeah . # You'll have to have Marmite Geoff , in them . # Well I said what he ought to do tonight , is be going to bed and have an early because do you know every flipping # night he's been going to bed at ten , eleven o see that was quarter past ten last night before you went to # That's a good job I found now you said it was a letter head paper , well that ain't a letter head paper ! # Well I would of probably found that , if I'd known . # I'm gonna put out that blooming old stuff these old # bu bu . # Oh no I'm not ready . # Oh my knee , it feels like I've pulled it out of joint or something ! # Well mummy's going to bed too , and I'm tired . # I'm gonna read for a little while but I feel # like a . # I likes them all nice . # You what ? # Hey ! # lot to wash up ! # You what ? # Yeah . # Why ? # Why what was the matter with her ? # Why ? # Why ? # Why ? # What was you doing ? # Who was she nasty with then ? # Why what did yo well what was he doing ? # Well I should think she did , I'll if you'd have done that in my room the and filled my room up with # with a gas I shouldn't of been very pleased either would you Geoff ? # Old sofa weren't it ? # Was it some sulphur thing or something ? # Something like that , well # Well I don't think I would of been very pleased if you'd put a go in the room for an hour ! # Yeah well you shouldn't do things like that ! # Well no , well turn it off while dad's doing his books he # So you really had an enjoyable day yesterday . # Did you then ? # I fed erm er Ginger . # You don't ! # Bet you don't wake him a lot ! # You look tired today , are you ? # That's all that sherry you had last night I should think isn't it ? # Yeah I do , I think it's lovely , but you shouldn't of spent your money , I told you ! # Well we've got a little camel ain't we ? # What you bought us what , what you got once before when we out for the day . # Well it don't matter . # He won't le ,expect you to buy us anything , I gave you the money to spend on yourself you don't ha # Did he now ? # How much did he spend then ? # Blimey he did well ! # Yeah . # Oh yeah ? # But you shouldn't of spent your money , I told you it was for you , not for me ! # The thought is there , I know , that's very nice but your coat ? # Have you got your trousers done up ? # Pull your trousers up properly ! # Why don't you wear that belt ? # Why ? # Oh . # What have you got all over your jumper ? # Oh dear I didn't know that , well the other one's in the wash so you'll have to wear it won't you ? # I've only just got it in the washing machine . # That's yogurt I should think come here , see if I can get it off with a cloth . # Why ? # Well course it can , from yesterday ! # No I've got the other one in the washing machine you got dirty . # is there ? # Come here , let's help you on with it . # Oh . # Here are , don't try and walk around with them then . # Alright then , bye bye . # Did you have your lunch on the bus ? # Where did you have it then ? # And you went outside did you ? # Oh . # Didn't they ? # Oh alright then , bye ! # then . # Ooh Jonathan , what about your spellings ? # Yeah don't forget ! # Bye ! # Hey ? # What's today , Thursday . # Alright , bye ! # I don't think so . # No I don't think so , I think it's all fiction . # Well I don't know Jonathan . # I don't know much about the whole subject . # Does it ? # Fudge ? # He what ? # Oh I don't think . # I don't know whether I shall or not , but I'll they're completely full anyway . # Seven I think nearly finished seven . # Well I'm doing my best ! # Well you see I ain't seen many people today . # Yeah . # Yeah , till half past three . # Well I'm doing my best ! # I shall have to talk to myself Jonathan ! # No ! # No ! # They'll think # I'm cuckoo if I do that ! # What ? # Well do you want them to think your mother's cuckoo ? # Well I think so cos I have to write in the book , I have to put myself ! # I put myself . # Well who else is myself ? # If that isn't me ! # Well I know ! # Well I don't want to be a total idiot thank you ! # Well I know you wouldn't care ! # No ! # It's all about conversation Jonathan , you'd hardly have a conver # What ? # cat flap . # Did anybody get for not behaving ? # Who was that ? # Ooh crumbs ! # What sort of plays ? # Well I , it wouldn't worry you , you aren't gonna be there ! # What you mean , play time ? # Well that's hardly fair if you didn't do it ! # Who did it ? # Who do you think did it ? # Well I think the person's very selfish not to own up . # Who Jeremy # I wouldn't be surprised ! # Well that isn't very fair on the rest of you though is it ? # Matthew didn't do it . # hasn't he been very well ? # No . # I've no idea Jonathan I'm not looking . # well dad'll probably ha , he usually has a lot to say when he comes home from work he's been home and rushed out so I # He's had to go and get a battery # for the minibus . # I'll tell you what you can do on the freezer there's some cat food for the cat you can feed him that . # No not all of it ! # I don't know how that tin got left out there . # And then you can bring yourself a couple of pizzas in . # Yes you can , they're on the top , you reached them the other night . # Will you please try them ? # Oh go on Jonathan ! # Why does it hurt your belly ? # Well how do you think mum does , she isn't half much taller than you anyway ! # Yeah . # Stay in there Jonathan cos . # . # Pardon ? # Well I suppose I would have to . # I certainly wouldn't like it . # Can't smell in that . # Hurry up ! # No I ain't gonna talk to myself ! # I can't you berk , you're right outside the door ! # Well I'm not really keen on having a box of Lego on the dinner table . # Well I don't really think it's right do you ? # Well I don't ! # I hope dad's not gonna be too late # cos we was late home for tea last night weren't we ? # He's always late , that is true . # Oh God ! # There goes the phone . # No , that's alright . # Oh . # I want that pen . # All these people want cars , I can't understand it # normally they don't want this time of year . # Renault's out that's on there the cars he's got that # I know ,yo , I can't talk every five minutes of the day . # Is that all you think about is money Jonathan ? # No I could do with a lot more . # That is the more I think about it though . # What ? # I know it is . # I hope daddy will be # She's lucky then ! # The price isn't the point . # Well , I don't know where they get their money from ! # Well that , precisely . # Oh are they ? # Did she ? # She's a funny girl isn't she Jonathan ? # Cos she erm she's throws a wobbly quite often don't she ? # Is she like that in class ? # Is She ? # for doing it ? # I shouldn't think , she hates Mrs don't she ? # Yeah , I dunno why . # Why ? # Well Mrs only tells her off when she's naughty . # I know she's not the most popular person , but she is # right a lot of the time . # Well not all the time , nobody's right all the time , but she is a right she is right a lot of the time Jonathan because some of them children misbehave # terribly ! # Bangers ? # What was is then ? # Oh . # Want Ben you know Ben don't you ? # He fell over , Jonathan could you take that Lego box off my table ! # He fell over and his tooth went straight through his lip ! # We had to take him to hospital and he had three stitches in it . # Yeah Ben . # I don't know who took him . # It was ! # That isn't Lisa , that's erm # no , what's her name now ? # Nope I can't think of her name . # It isn't Lisa erm she's got blonde hair hasn't she ? # Oh , I can't think of her name now cos I got a mental block . # Well I don't know , he only comes part-time . # Gemma Gemma . # Gemma and Ben are brother and sister # What is it then ? # Well anyway , him then . # Did you know ? # Was a lot of blood . # How did he fall over ? # Woosh ! # What ? # He had a tooth , that went straight through his bottom lip . # Mrs said he was ever so good . # Well I think we better have our tea if daddy's here in a minute . # So get that Lego off the table and you tea . # Don't be silly Jonathan ! # You're not funny , that's ever so silly ! # No . # Now where's Fudge in or out ? # Is he ? # Was she still ? # You all going down Robert's tonight . # Alright . # I think tea will be virtually ready . # Well come on dad # if he comes . # I suppose I'll have to put his in the microwave , I can't keep messing about like this . # What ? # Well he did the other night didn't he ? # Walked in as I said it . # I know he did . # Come on now I want the Lego off the table please ! # Don't be so cheeky ! # I warned you the other night , me and you gonna fall out if you keep being cheeky . # Remember what erm two christmas cards today look ! # One from Mrs next door # You know , who used to be there ? # I said hello from the . # Hope life is treating you well . # We shall have to pop in one of these days and surprise you . # I've got a headache . # Meantime we wish you a very happy nineteen ninety two , our warmest wishes Carole and Ian P S Julian bought his own place two years ago . # That boy , their son , the young one . # And that one's from Michael and Nathan and Gareth . # You know Michael ? # Didn't they come down here , them two boys one night with their dad ? # To pick up a well they come here one afternoon to pick up a car . # Yeah that's right . # Yeah I think he goes to when you go . # I think so , I'm not quite sure . # I tell you who else goes when you go , erm # Dale . # Is it Dale ? # Dale . # Well I don't know his name ! # I # I don't know them all . # Who said that ? # People die and what ? # Well that ain't very nice ! # Well you'll singing # for the infants aren't you ? # Well that's gonna be in the church then , that # What . # No it isn't , it's the eighteenth . # Well it ain't the eighteenth next week cos the . # Well I don't think you are . # I don't think so . # Well it says on here look Jonathan , if you look ! # It says a Christmas service will be held in the oh no it isn't the juniors are now helping the infants with their nativity story on Wednesday the eighteenth of December this was originally a advertised , by me , at taking place at six thirty in Walton St . Peter Church , I'm afraid this was a mistake on my part , as in fact the performance is rather ten thirty on the da on that day at Walter St . Andrew Church . # This timing will enable even the youngest children to take part . # Mum'll go to that cos I like carols . # Well course you are going to it ! # Why ? # Can you get off # I'm ready ! # I'm ready Jonathan ! # Now quickly ! # Why ? # Well then why did you let me put all your things you have that side ? # Right , let's give you some chips . # Is that enough ? # What ? # That first what ? # Where ? # Yeah a lot of people have been there , I do agree . # Yes . # Yeah , Helen ,yes . # Ooh that ball isn't half noisy , I hate that ball ! # I think I'll t # please ! # Where's your manners just lately , you've lost them since you've been to school ! # How many do you want ? # Thank you . # Don't show your ignorance please ! # Well there is a please and thank you word ! # Oh dear ! # Up where ? # Oh no that's all I need ! # Yeah ? # Yeah well he's not home yet . # No . # Yeah he shouldn't be long before he's home but # Yeah . # Erm I can't tell you what time he'll be home really erm well say in the twenty minutes he's bound to be home cos he he's been home and then he's had to shoot out again , he's gone to get the battery so he won't be long . # Alright ? # Yeah yeah that'll be fine , yep , yeah . # Okay then yeah , bye ! # Silly git ! # say that about people mum's awful saying that ! # Ooh I forgot about that ! # Yeah well mum can't he looked alright . # Ooh ! # I burnt myself ! # I've done you one as well . # Oh well me and dad will have to have more each . # I don't think you'll like them anyway Jonathan . # That's what I thought I should think dad'll come home now that he's gone . # Erm # I bet he doesn't . # Well I'll leave I can't wait any longer , I'm hungry . # Mr went to the dentist this morning didn't he ? # Who did you have teaching you this morning then ? # Well part of the morning , who taught you this morning ? # I thought you said he went to the dentist ? # Which classroom was he in then ? # Oh he's gone back in his own classroom now has he ? # You need a lot of teachers don't you ? # What teacher do you like the best ? # Do you ? # Well you can't have it , you've eaten yours ! # Have it next time . # Did Kelly go on about her teeth ? # What ? # Oh ! # Why ? # No she went to the dentist instead , I mean the hospital . # Mm . # Have , enough of her Jonathan . # Is it ? # Yeah but she's diabetic . # Yeah but she's under anaesthetic . # But she has to cos she's a diabetic . # Mm just a sec . # Here's comes your dad . # I should think . # to his stuff . # They want it about eleven but I said , can you get down to get it ? # Because your dad won't be there , will he ? # I have a your dad can # And also that young chap's been here for the van . # It was a nice little feller . # or anything like that . # Dunno ! # Got jeans on him . # He had another boy with him might # I dunno . # Mm . # Yeah . # Where's your other half then ? # not needed , give me that half . # Oh I thought you was on about the pie . # They ain't got a lot of flavour have they ? # I've done all inside that van . # Just gotta wash the outside . # Yeah , cos it's Sun , Saturday . # Ooh crumbs ! # What are you gonna say to him ? # Well he's moving furniture as well . # Yeah but he must bring it back by nine ! # I forgot Mr was having it . # So your mum won't be able # to go shopping till nine then ? # Well they don't normally go till about nine anyway well they can't cos the post office don't open till do you want a coffee ? # Do you know I've been so busy , I done that van this morning , I've done my housework and two loads of washing been over Petes' did I tell you ? # rang you ? # Do you the pies ? # Make a change didn't it ? # I quite like them . # Not a lot of meat in them though is there ? # Them ones we got from . # Posted them letters did you ? # Where are they ? # Well I'd have done them myself ! # We ain't heard a word from Jimmy have we ? # Pardon ? # Why , what you gotta do ? # But to work this morning , I could of done it ! # I said take the bus . # Yeah but I could of when I got home ! # Now I've gotta do it in the dark ! # Well the hoover won't , except I had to scrub that mini that erm that van , it was so filthy ! # And now who ? # Jimmy did . # I wonder where he's getting his vehicles from this week ? # I thought you said they stopped the ? # Bloody ridiculous that man ! # So someone bought the bailiffs in for sixty two quid ! # Who's A T S ? # You don't owe them nothing do you , I hope ? # Precisely for that reason I should think ! # Oh . # So this is isn't what it's all about ? # Oh . # That's ridiculous innit ? # He's just being awkward by the sound of it . # Well why don't he use that bloke at St . Johns , who you use ? # Well that's a ridiculous thing to do ! # Well they say they're gonna put you into court , you get it paid don't you , before anything goes further ? # It will all depend how long has he owed them it . # Cor ! # My God ! # For sixty two pound , it must of cost them more than that ! # They obviously don't like him do they ? # Perhaps it's # Yeah but he's got his self a bad name now isn't he ? # It made me laugh when your mum kept on about him last night , about having all his hampers stolen . # Ridiculous innit ? # The blokes on the make isn't he ? # Who did pay the insurance ? # Well I should think so ,gonna get twenty two grand out of it ! # Cos he'd have taken them to court and said well he didn't even pay it , I did ! # Yeah but I don't think that's gonna be such an easy case to . # You know it looks to me # they think that it's all cut and dry , well they haven't got the then people will come round and investigate yet ! # Well I can't stop it cos the kettle's boiling ! # Don't be silly ! # Jonathan put that straight in the bin for mum , will you please ? # Yeah . # , they're going to Yarmouth . # that's where they're going cos he said they he's not actually for the itself # it's you know , for the workers , they're going out on a meal . # He is gonna pay his self . # Yeah . # Well I presume so . # He ought to have done it through the college got it cheaper . # He said this is nothing to do with the college . # Well I suppose he's , the man's got his reasons . # Yeah cos you gotta lay out money aren't you ? # Oh he said , when he's finished I don't whether he's not picking it up till later on . # Ooh and another that's what I wanted to tell you about well I don't think we can help him out . # Gentleman wanted a minibus # now , he talked rather nice erm with having four # I can't remember his name at all I can I can't think of it now . # Well what he wanted , he wanted a minibus from there to there and there well we can't can we ? # We can have one from there to there but he can't have one here . # Can he ? # Just a minute Jonathan , let mum because the college has got one there # Toby's got one there and got the other one there . # Well what time is Toby coming back ? # Well so he can't have that one then ? # And the Isle of Ely college is going out for a meal , so that won't be back , so he can't have that one , so we haven't got one ! # For Friday night , but he can have one sort of , first thing Saturday morning . # But otherwise we haven't got one . # erm , and that lady's gonna ring about the Fiesta # and then that young boy's gonna ring about the van . # But that means that won't get cleaned outside for Mr # Mr . # Well but it's very clean inside , I scrubbed it . # And polished it . # I wouldn't of thought he'd of worried too much about the outside . # Well it isn't that bad , it's only down the bottom anyway . # I did ! # Well that's gotta be back by nine in the morning . # As long as he's got that back in the yard by nine . # Well I did see him , he seemed alright but you see you can't tell what people are like ,yo you may think they have ni # nice personalities but he could now do a runner with our van couldn't they ? # I reckon that's what honky tonk was on the other night though . # I reckon he's in trouble . # So well , he could have the van well how much would you charge him for tonight ? # Yeah cos Mr 's got the Renault . # Oh in decent state he didn't last time I scrubbed well I wou # No . # Yeah well they sho I said I'd I was looking through this # and I was thinking cor we say we haven't been doing very well , but look at that week there ! # And then look it's not # too bad for this time of I bet we're doing better this year , this time of the year than we did last . # Well you see you do that minibus want cleaning up , that blue one or was that clean before we put it in the shed ? # Erm , I should imagine so . # Yes , she is . # Don't she like the column change ? # Oh God ! # Well you'll just have to explain to her , the other one # hasn't come back after you've # Well I don't know what time she's picking it up at actually . # I should imagine that's his number . # I hope he paid you this week then . # Well you with his money you can pay off them two bills . # Cos yo you don't put them through do you ? # His ? # Have you # put any on ? # Well then forget about this time , that won't hurt will it ? # We've been doing alright otherwise . # Pete was talking about his Roly he said June , he said he is such a character ! # So I said , is he ? # So he he's been up he's one of type of dogs , he said like a human you wouldn't know if he went in the house they wouldn't know whether he was coming out with a double barrelled shot gun to shoot yourself or # with a glass of sherry in his hand ! # He said he's # one of them types ! # Pete was hoping they ain't drunken no cider ! # He must have had four glasses while I was there . # I shouldn't talk about him cos that's not nice and he said , I said to him . # They must both drink . # They're not even afford it . # Whatever for this time ! # Well I thought he didn't go down there any more ? # She didn't ! # Well I suppose it does make him feel uncomfortable . # Yeah he said I've forgotten about it Blue's forgotten about it he said , but she won't let it rest he said he said it's Well she's a child , she's only a child Geoff that's # why . # She's like a spoilt child , she's gotta learn to # from there soon . # Well I suppose it probably wasn't tha , a complete pack of lies Geoff . # So you've gotta be the one who tells him . # Well I think he's right . # Jonathan ! # Well that's right . # Well that is right innit ? # But she's like a child really you gotta pity her really haven't you ? # But the point is , why should other people suffer her . # You know , they shouldn't have to should they ? # All that worrying ! # My best friend's lost his father and he said well I lay awake all last night thinking about it . # Well I thought # there's nothing you can laying awake . # Well oh he said it's at work and oh God ! # Well I wouldn't like to say he's paranoid but I said well that's like cos he said you must our house is filthy June ? # I didn't pass comment . # So I said well , that's like this Pete , you live the way you want to and I'll live the way I want to , I said it's immaterial to me . # Your paying me to keep it a bit tidy , I said and that's what I'm paid for , I said I ain't paid to pass an opinion whether it's clean or dirty he said you sound just like me June , I said oh do I ? # I said well I'm not bothered what other people do , I said they can # What ? # Well I nearly said that to him , but I thought ooh no ! # But , I thought to myself well that's up to him how he li , he , he lives his life . # I don't want my house looking like a tip ! # But i but he is bothered about it . # He said and that's Tricia , he said she he said when I used to live on my own with Simon # he said , and she used to come down he said she used to think I've got another woman ! # Li li whatever for ! # He said cos I used to keep the house tidy he said I've been the in the army June an he said I can I can run a household he said but we and then working the shifts I do he said and go up the horses and that he said I just don't get time to do it ! # He said well you know I , I iron mostly , most of the ironing , I said yeah I know you do . # Well well he said when he's not there she comes home she cooks them an evening meal but she's she she's she's got a p , he said she's gotta give some time to Harriet , that's not fair # if she don't , I said well that's true I said you can't and we're not gonna neglect , which they don't . # And then he said er by the time she's sorted out and washed up # and I thought , she don't wash up , she # leaves it for me ! # Erm it's tha then getting towards and she's gone down and done the horses he sh he said it's then getting to Harriet's bed time so she baths her all sorts her out and he said well she does work hard , he said and by the end of that she she won't be able to do anything else ! # Well I said I can understand that # I I said well I suppose it's I do and he said but you work hard June , I said I know but I said kno I said what I do , I can only have hour out there and an hour inside . # And I said I can sort of keep on top of mine , but I said I am up early . # He said well Trish isn't . # I said well I get up early . # If I'm doing like my jobs . # I said I'm , most morning I said sort of every other morning I'm ironing here at half five # I said because if I don't I can't pick up all this . # Cor he said , I wouldn't wanna iron that time of the morning ! # I said well I'm afraid if I don't , I said , I don't do it ! # I said and I do I said I can't bare piles and piles of ironing . # So he said well if you'd have come over this morning June you'd have fainted ! # So I said why ? # He said well there was # What're you gonna now then ? # Yep . # Yeah . # Yeah ,then . # Yeah . # Yep , come on then , get your shoes on ! # Yeah . # Here's your shoes . # Dunno ! # Oh ! # James who ? # He was fighting everybody yesterday ! # What was the matter with him ? # Did you give him his card ? # He isn't having a party did he ? # Oh I don't think he is at this rate na , Jonathan ! # That ain't tight enough mate . # Right do you wanna quickly do these up ? # Oh alright then , that's up to you . # Now look Jonathan ! # I'll put them in the deep part . # Now look you've got to give that ticket back to Mr otherwise you won't get a Christmas dinner ! # There it is in there , and there's ninety p , there's a pound coin in there and then I'll sort out about the dinner money with Mrs . # Alright ? # Go and what ? # Why ? # Oh blow him ! # Do you not wanna go to ? # Well this is for the Chris ins , # Well you can take that back now , as well . # That's on the twentieth of December in the evening time . # Well you can take that one back Monday . # Shall I wait and think about it ? # Go on then . # Be a good boy now Jo learn those ! # Alright , bye ! # Yeah see you ! #