I have joined the frustrated masses baying for the blood of Australia Post, which has now marred two special occasions for me in as many months.
Before I sound like an entitled whinger who does so much online shopping she's statistically guaranteed to lose every second package, let me clarify that I hate shopping like the plague. 
Trundling about at a shopping centre on the weekend is my own personal nightmare and that is why I went online for gifts for my second wedding anniversary and my brother's birthday. I would select what I wanted online and be guaranteed of its delivery post-haste. 
Ha! 
My husband is famous in the family for his creative gift-giving skills, which are frankly hard to match. But as our second (cotton) anniversary approached I thought for once I might thwart, or at least keep up with him. 
It's hard to find cute and romantic cotton gifts, by the way, that don't make you want to puke, like matching "Mr and Mrs" cushions. I finally forked out for something I thought personal and sweet.
Two weeks later, on our anniversary, I woke to his cotton-inspired treasure hunt, following threads of cotton about the house to unearth buried treasures of Peter Alexander.
I gave him a card and an apology. Of course he didn't mind but I felt terrible. 
The store sent a replacement, which arrived before the original did weeks later.
For my brother's birthday my sister and I ordered, eight days early, a parcel supposed to take five to six days. We thought it might be a day or two late and if so, no harm done - the celebration would take place after the day anyway. 
After a week, tracking advised the parcel was still in transit.
I knew that to avoid a rage-induced heart attack I'd better not try to ring Australia Post so I used their Facebook page, knowing they probably had people monitoring complaints there - their struggles of late have been well publicised. 
I leapt into the torrent of abuse and added mine, though I tried to be more polite than others. I'm aware Australia Post's problems are not the fault of the poor suckers vetting their social media accounts.
One assured me the parcel would probably be there in a day or two.
"If you need anything else down the line, be sure to let me know," he said cheerily.
More than a week later I have asked again and another staffer has apologised and told me the item should have been delivered long ago. They advised me to contact the seller. 
My sister and I have nothing to give our brother when we see him on Wednesday night. The seller has now sent a new parcel, so again a gift will be given weeks after the occasion has passed. I know in a way it's not a big deal, but I can't help but be upset. As a consumer you pay your money at the right time and you expect a consistent, dependable result. 
The seller - boutique Melbourne outfit, not a big chain able to absorb infinite losses - confided on the phone they had employed an extra person just to keep up with Australia Post problems. 
"They let us down every day," he told me.
"It's the bane of my existence."
A quick look at visitor posts to Australia Post's Facebook page shows nine complaints in the hour I spent writing this. Going back a little further it looks par for the course. And that's just on the Facebook page. 
When I told Australia Post I was considering avoiding ordering from any business using its services, I got this reply.
"I do understand your disappointment over your gifts not arriving in time (or at all) and why you would be reluctant to rely on our service again," Rhonda said.
"Although your recent experiences with our service have not been positive ones, I can assure you that the vast majority of the many millions of parcels we deliver each year arrive safely and on time. This is why so many businesses continue to use our parcel services.
"I hope that any future experiences you have with us are positive ones."
Me too guys, because on the third strike you'll be out! 
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