the Captain , however , forbade it . I honestly do think that a captain of one of H.M ships seldom finds himself criticized in an official document requiring his signature . Brock , as usual , ignored the impertinence - for the moment . on the other hand I find a cutting from a naval and military record of December 14th pasted into my diary which reads : sir - in your issue of the 30th ult there was a letter signed naval officer complaining that our main fleets spend too much time at sea and that on this account there is a grave discontent among the personnel . as an officer of more than a couple of years &apos; standing I have discovered none of these terrible grievances . in fact I am perfectly satisfied with my lot , and do not find my ship in the least stuffy , nor do I mind putting to sea in her . these views are shared by everyone I have spoken to . does naval officer want our fleets to lie alongside the home ports , Gibraltar or Malta , for nine months in the year ? it is not every naval officer who is afraid of battle exercises , or manning and arming ship , or of sea trips between nice places . if naval officer chooses to present one side of the case to the British public , surely the views of the majority may have a hearing also . N O . of course no one penetrated my anonymous signature . Brock would have been puzzled at such a letter coming from me ! it was about now that I took action against their lordships themselves in the matter of the yearly examination in French of junior officers afloat . my diary simply records : French exam . had hoped to do well but they asked what were the pronouns which correspond to the adjectives ce , cette , ces , son , nos , leurs . got furious with the question and wrote down ce , ces and cette are not adjectives ; son , nos and leurs are pronouns . so do n&apos;t expect much kudos . their lordships &apos; reply was in the shape of a &amp;pound;5 silver stop watch by S Smith &amp; Son , 9 the Strand , London , inscribed : Admiralty prize junior officers afloat , 1905 , French , Midn O M Frewen , R.N , an unusually gracious admission of defeat probably due to a printer &apos;s error . the watch , admittedly not worn continuously , fell into disrepair just fifty-two years later , and it seemed to me natural to go to the address printed on its face to ask the makers to overhaul it . by 1957 London traffic had become something of a nightmare to rural drivers so that my wife parked our little Morris car in the taxicab sanctuary of Charing Cross just for a moment while I walked west to no 9 - and found it not , not on the south side anyway , where stand the other low odd numbers . after much research , and in an indignation equal to that of Midn Frewen at his French exam , I crossed the road and demanded of a shop-owner opposite where were S Smith &amp; Son ? never been in the Strand , he answered . well , here &apos;s their address on the face of my watch , I retorted . well , I can only say that I &apos;ve been here twenty-five years and they &apos;ve never been here in my time closed the discussion , but not the enquiry : he kindly produced a London telephone directory which directed us to 179 Great Portland Street , W.1 , with more and worse traffic jams , including a succession of no entry streets negatively barring our car &apos;s access to the promised land . we eventually walked there and my watch - her speed she reneweth again . the taxi drivers at Charing Cross had also shown the courtesy one has come to expect of them . I had loved the idea of coming to sea , to cruise and see the world , but my diary entry in December 1905 reads : have now done 90 days - in Malta . ninety days &apos; detention was a stereotyped punishment for major offences by lower deck ratings . and we had another six weeks to come before again sailing the seas . 8 . feminine influence on senior officers . Christmas day , 1905 , was my first one in a ship , 1903 and 1904 having been spent on leave . I think my diary entry may be of interest for a typical account . it reads : turned out 7.30 . after breakfast read last days of Pompeii till divisions . Skipper had everybody aft and told them in a good short speech that the C.-in-C would have gone rounds had the ship not been in dockyard hands . then church . after church I had meant to take holy communion but , being ordered up there by the Commander , I got very angry and refused to go . then went round the mess decks , taking various savoury meats from various nicely decorated messes , notably the chief stokers &apos; . the Skipper and warrant officers then came into the gunroom . after lunch got into de Burgh &apos;s knickers , my blue jacket , brother Hugh &apos;s stockings , and brown boots . went ashore with Ritchie and de Burgh ; went up to Admiralty House and found Gibbs , who promptly offered me the loan of his riding-boots . wore them . went back to Calcara Steps and mounted . my G a most spirited one . he kept galloping away from the rest the whole way to St Paul &apos;s Bay , where we had tea , twenty-four of us ; the C.-in-C , his wife , nine officers and thirteen snotties . ( Hervey left his G behind and turned up in a carrotze . ) started back about 4.30 . had a splendid series of gallops and got back to Porta Reale about 5.30 . went to Admiralty House to return my boots and Gibbs made me eat unheard-of chunks of ripping cake . then came on board . had no dinner . could n&apos;t after Gibbs &apos; cake . feeling rather sore but very bucked up with the afternoon &apos;s work , though not exactly with things in general . dominant fed-upness of the day was that fool Commander stopping me going to second service . he might have known that any self-respecting Englishman would , in the first place , go ; and in the second place refuse to be ordered about on such subjects . and he thought he was doing right too , I suppose . all hands stood off after divisions . I was indeed so indignant over being ordered to holy communion that I actually entered it in my official journal for the naval instructor &apos;s and Captain &apos;s signatures . holy Joe sent for me and said that if I did not erase it he would have to draw the Captain &apos;s attention to it , so this I did . whether as a Chaplain he considered the incident reflected on the Commander , or whether as my naval instructor he considered that it reflected on me for disobedience of orders , I never knew . my journal also says of my ride , no casualties , although I was nearly thrown onto a donkey-cart and was repeatedly not under control . Mr Hervey came in a carrotze , being unable to persuade his pony to keep up with the rest . ( tactfully put . ) a very enjoyable afternoon , but it made me very stiff for two or three days after . my journal for December 31st states aggressively : nothing of note happened until 11.55 p.m when I was turned out rather forcibly and after witnessing Mr Bennett strike 16 bells , drank punch in the wardroom . owing , however , to the Captain &apos;s not caring for noise and singing we turned in again about 12.30 . thus ended the year 1905 . to be fair to poor Osmond de B Brock , who did n&apos;t attend the traditional ceremony of striking 16 bells , my diary records that we went and struck about 32 bells , i.e no ceremony but just a cacophony on the ship &apos;s bell , and in the wardroom the demure noise and singing is described sang auld lang syne . then Chichester as junior snottie attempted Clementine and I helped him through it . however , at the third verse the Skipper got agribulgent , so we desisted and went and kicked up hell and the sleepers in the chest flat . at last slept and lay in till 7.30 . then worried Hardy by singing in the bathroom . the Captain responded to the aggression in my journal , which he inspected and initialled on Tuesday , by sending for me on Thursday to tell me the sketch I had put in was not good enough for such a good journal as mine and would I improve it before going ashore . in fact , stopped my leave . I submitted my improvements the following Tuesday and the old devil is n&apos;t satisfied yet ! but let me have my leave back . I was also in trouble now with Gathorne-Hardy , who ordered me to report myself , dressed , to him every morning , for not being out of the chest-flat by 7.45 . I turned out next morning at 5.30 to attend the daily hands fall in , dressed and woke the distinguished senior lieutenant and made my report by 6.15 , which was not well received . news now came through that Mamma and sister Clare were going to arrive on the 18th . I searched Valletta for rooms and , with a good deal of trouble , finally managed to secure them in the Royal Hotel in Strada Mercanti , not the best quarter of the city but the best I could do . but Sir George Warrender , Bart , Captain of H.M.S Carnarvon , had also been on the lookout and found them grander ones at the Lord Nelson , in Floriana . and with their arrival the scallywag snottie was thrown back to his first few days at sea and became the popular midshipman of the bulwark , to be received by admirals , captains ( except him of the bulwark ) , wardroom officers , and even by the rifle brigade , then stationed at Pieta , whose major , Tom Hollond , had been the Duke of Connaught &apos;s A.D.C at Clare &apos;s coming-out season in Dublin in 1903 , when the Duke was Commander-in-Chief . my diary for the 18th records : turned out 7.30 and dressed in plain clothes . during breakfast got a signal from C.-in-C ( cruising in H.M.S Surprise , the C.-in-C. &apos;s yacht in those gracious days ) asking when my people were coming . told him , and then went ashore . at 9.20 the General Chanzy arrived , and chartering a nice dghaisa , I followed them up harbour . Bennett turned up with a signal from the Admiral saying his barge and carriage were at Ma &apos;s disposal . found the carriage awaiting us at the custom House and drove to the Lord Nelson , and I had my second breakfast . then Lula ( Tom Hollond &apos;s most charming wife ) and Sir George looked in on us . at 4.30 we three went to Lula &apos;s and wandered round the garden till Acheson turned up , when Clare and he wandered round together and Ma and I kept out of the way . after tea Ma and Clare returned to their hotel and I to the ship . made an evolution of dressing , hurling the innards of my sea-chest far and wide , and ended up with a flying leap across the schoolplace table in the middle of dinner to provide myself with a gold stud . then repaired to Sir George &apos;s and we had a good dinner - in fact I ate too much . we then went on to the opera , using no 13 box ( Charlie B. &apos;s ) . the opera was Rigoletto . all the &amp;eacute;lite were there . Gibbs turned up with a message from the C.-in-C and I introduced him . Clare went into ecstasies over him and Ma thought him so nice and good looking . gather I am not a screaming success , especially with Mother . they stripped me of my white waistcoat to send it to the wash , and lectured me on the need of sucking up to my superiors , with the usual result . then returned on board 12.35 and turned in . next morning , a Friday , asked the Commander for leave till Feb 5th . he said he would see the Captain about it , but did not expect I would get it . then seizing my fast-waning courage in both hands and a tooth , asked could I go ashore now . he said if Parsoon agreed , I could . Parsoon disagreed , so I did . found Ma in her chemise and Clare in her bed . 