what ! he cried , like a man astonished , have you loved me and I been so inconsiderate as to make myself unworthy of your love ? did my eyes never tell you what I looked for in yours ? I never had the boldness , he answered , to make any such construction of your looks . your fear was the effect of indifference , I said , still , no more of what is past . tell me now ; can you love me ? rather ask me , Ma&apos;m , he confessed , if all the affection of my soul can merit your love ? and whether the Earl of Leicester , whom you design to make the happiest man on earth , shall not carry the day from me . the Earl of Leicester , I explained hastily , was but a pretence to make you speak ; I told you then the thoughts I truly had of you . my trouble was not small , both in your absence and since your return ; but all is now forgotten . he answered me with some disorder which I imagined the effect of sudden joy . I thought it time to be no longer scrupulous , that it was in vain to have any reserve when I had said so much . I will not let you go under any uncertainty , I proceeded , but to convince you clearly of the truth of what I &apos;ve said take this ring , as the highest mark of my favour . keep it as a pledge of my love , which I charge you to preserve , and on that condition I promise never to deny you anything you shall desire when you shew it ; though it cost me my life ! his joy at receiving the ring was in appearance extraordinary and unparalleled , and attended with promises of as high a nature . he left for Ireland in a few days leaving me fully persuaded his thoughts were wholly taken up with me . but he had scarce advanced upon the rebels than he was charged with all the crimes that brought about his imprisonment , together with that of the Earl of Southampton . then it was I began to repent I had not given ear to the wholesome advice Cecil would have given me concerning the secret conduct of the Earl of Essex . in a word , while my thoughts were wholly employed to make his fortune he was plotting with the Earl of Tyrone to surprise and make me prisoner ! you know the rest : his obstinate resistance , his want of respect for my orders , his imprisoning my ministers , his murdering my soldiers , and his intolerable pride in all his misfortune . so ended the Queen &apos;s confession , which having called fresh to her mind all that had passed between her and Essex made her more troubled than ever . the Countess of Nottingham had listened with keen interest , for she , as well as the Queen , had been in love with the Earl of Essex ! but newly understanding the reason for his coldness it added infinitely to her former resentment . she had no mind to condemn the Queen &apos;s weakness knowing herself guilty of the like , nor was she inclined to speak in favour of a man who had grown so much the more odious to her as she had formerly loved him . she thought it sufficient to comfort the Queen with words that seemed to proceed only from loyalty , when in truth her thoughts were wholly bent for the ruin of an ungrateful lover , who , in her eyes deserved nothing but hatred . though the Earl of Essex did not fall for the Countess of Nottingham , yet another was her admirer , whose character did in a way make her amends . it was Secretary Cecil , who , amidst his great offices and the gravity that became them , discovered in the beauty , ingenuity , and personal charm of the Countess of Nottingham an attraction that made him capable of strong feelings for her . this was heightened by their mutual hatred of Essex , Cecil having always looked upon him as an invincible obstacle to his ambitious pretentions , whilst the Countess had against him all the rage of an aversion that usually succeeds rejected love . they were glad of the imprisonment of the Earl of Essex , but the favourable inclinations the Queen expressed alarmed them . the Countess had no sooner taken leave of the Queen than she gave Cecil an account of all she had learnt . having considered the consequences they concluded it necessary , while their sovereign pined secretly for the prisoner , that ways should be found , without their appearing conspicuous , to take away the mercy which love might well inspire her with . Cecil , for the first step , pressed the Queen to bring Essex to trial , and caused certain news of his death to be spread throughout England . Essex , meantime , was busied with thoughts of more weight than those of his life . he knew well enough the Queen loved him , also that he had deceived her , and that she might with a great deal of justice , not only reproach but condemn him . the Queen had not seen him since his departure for Ireland , but not having the power to give him up to his ill-fortune she resolved to go to his house , where he was prisoner , to reproach him as he deserved and endeavour if possible to find him innocent . it was not far from Whitehall to Essex House , and the Queen so arranged the matter that no notice was taken of the visit , having been introduced by her confidants . Essex was very surprised at the arrival of the Queen , and the languishing condition she was in made her weak in his presence . all was in his favour , the victory seemed easy . he addressed her with the utmost respect , but upon doing so she broke down , crying bitterly for some minutes . well , Robert , she began , after a pause , you see what I do for you , notwithstanding all the crimes I can reproach you with . I have come with a design to hear you , to see if you have anything to say to justify yourself . I have loved you too well , and wish it above all things ; but I would that heaven were pleased your justification might be realised even by the most precious thing in my power ! my greatest crime is that I thought myself too secure , Ma&apos;m , replied the Earl , desperately . had you rested there ! said the Queen , I should have been too well satisfied . but to believe yourself secure , was it necessary you should betray me ? and did you have need to use violence , to make yourself master of a fortune I was willing to share ? what reason had you to seek protection from the Kings of Scotland and Spain ? did any interest force you to correspond with Tyrone ? and was it for the safety of my person you designed to make me your prisoner , and his ? all you have done since to my subjects , against my orders ; are these the expressions of your respect ? is it by this murder and treason that you shew your devotion to me and the public ? or is all we have seen and heard of you but an illusion ? yes , Ma&apos;m , he said , those accusations of treason and evil design have run me upon the desperate resistance I made . you have been pleased to heap favours upon me , and I too proud of what I so little deserved flattered myself with the expectation of a thousand pleasures , which you had not forbid me to hope for . this let loose the envy and jealousy of others against my good fortune . they abused your majesty with misinformation and I had the misfortune to be assured you had ordered my arrest , although my innocence would have persuaded me to the contrary . I confess , I was enraged to see my enemies gloat over my downfall , being abandoned by your majesty and on the point of suffering , perhaps , a shameful death . I thought it neither good for my reputation , nor your majesty &apos;s honour , that I should die as a criminal . this forced me to those ends they reproach me with and the resolution I took to go out of England in hopes to confound my accusers . but I found all ways of escape closed , and must acknowledge that in so desperate a condition I took revenge on your ministers . they , Ma&apos;m , and only they , were the object of the rebellion I am charged with . my design was that those who had so industriously laboured to make me appear guilty should do me right in declaring my innocence , and permit me to lay it , and my life , at your majesty &apos;s feet . I never doubted that your majesty would have done me the honour of a fair hearing . and that by a clear discovery of the truth I should have certainly frustrated them . but their malice has had success : to see me a prisoner , hated by my sovereign , despised by the world , and made a sacrifice to their rage . and now , what remains , that I receive the sentence of death pronounced by them , and see Cobham , Cecil , Raleigh , and their fellows , share the favours you honoured me with ? be assured I do not hate you , said the Queen , interrupting him , but shall I believe you ? yet should I not believe ? can I give you up to your ill fate ? I shall never murmur against your majesty &apos;s orders , replied the Earl , but submit to them readily whatever they may be . the Earl of Essex knew the weak side of the Queen , and easily revived in her that love he had formerly inspired her with . no , she said , having paused a while , you shall not die . make use of your advantage , triumph over a heart whose inclinations you very well know . I will believe your intentions less criminal than they appear , but , Robert , I warn you by that love of which you have particular experience that you give me no cause to repent of it . trouble not yourself for your reputation and honour I will take care to repair it , and before two days be over I will restore you to the highest place you ever held . Essex , overcome with joy by the success of this meeting , affected the Queen so much that he restored her spirits to perfect tranquility . at parting she promised to call the council on the following day , and , in an ostentatious manner , declare him innocent . as soon as it was daylight , she sent for Cecil ; the Countess of Nottingham attended her . having told them in a few words of a great conflict between her justice and her mercy , she concluded for the latter , and ordered Cecil to summon the council that she might declare to them the design she had to set Essex at liberty , assuring him she had invincible reasons for doing so . this was a mortal blow to the ambitious Cecil and the Countess of Nottingham ; they looked at one another perplexed , as if they would have asked each other&apos;s advice on what course was to be taken . afterwards they spoke to the Queen in hopes to divert her , but she was inflexible ; Cecil was forced to order an extraordinary meeting of the council . but while the Earl of Essex &apos;s enemies thought his good fortune on the point of being reconciled to him chance laboured for them with unexpected success . as the Queen was going to council word was brought that the Countess of Rutland desired an audience . the Queen blushed as she remembered what was past , and looking on the request as unreasonable and unlucky she was minded to put off the Countess to another time . but considering that she never denied any person access , and that the Countess of Rutland was a Lady of the highest repute , she commanded her to be admitted . though her face was sad , her dress and gait very careless , yet her beauty was outstanding . moving forward she threw herself at the Queen &apos;s feet . Madam , she cried , I come to implore your majesty &apos;s goodness for the unfortunate Earl of Essex ! for the Earl of Essex ? 